June 22, 2005
(ML #3542, GN 1139)
FD/MM/FM April 2005
ML #3239:13–46, GN 841
13. (Dad: ) One of the God-given responsibilities of parents is to raise their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. When the Lord gives you a child, He's also giving you the responsibility to mold that life into a vessel for Him. You're His hands, His feet‚ His eyes, His love, His care, and even His firm hand of correction.
14. All throughout history men have admitted the need for discipline. King Solomon said that "He that spareth the rod, hateth his son. But he that loveth him, chasteneth him promptly." He also said, "The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame." And echoing these words of wisdom from King Solomon is the old English saying that if you spare the rod, you spoil the child. There's also another verse that says, "Train up a child in the way he should go‚ and when he is old he will not depart from it."
15. Well, in order to train a child, there has to be some form of parental authority exerted in the form of a disciplinary standard. The parents are supposed to rule the house of God, but all too often it seems like the children are ruling the house through their disrespectfulness, their rowdy behavior, and their wild, unruly spirits.
Children Are a Lot Like Horses!
16. Some of our kids are getting to be like wild horses. You parents just can't seem to keep them under control! You're letting them get away with all kinds of atrocious behavior in some cases. Kids have a lot of energy and they will run wild and create havoc if you don't firmly hold on to the reins and steer them in the right direction.
17. Children are a lot like horses. They can be stubborn‚ but at the same time, if they're gentled with a lot of love and care they will become obedient to your slightest bidding. You've got to train children, just like horses, from a very young age. If you start lovingly and gently teaching and training them, just like a horse, it won't be necessary to apply the bit.
18. Just like a horse that has been gentled‚ you'll be able to ride that creature with only a bridle and you won't have to apply the bit. With a horse that is yielded and obedient, you just have to use the reins to tug slightly on the bridle to the right or to the left, and then they'll go in that direction.
19. With an obedient horse, you barely have to touch their sides with your feet and they'll begin moving; you barely have to pull the reins and they'll come to an abrupt halt.
20. Whereas with a horse that is unruly and hasn't been trained from the beginning, just like a child that hasn't been trained or disciplined, you have to put the bit in and often have to use a lot more force to get them to obey and do what you ask. You have to pull pretty hard on the reins to one side to get them to go where you want. You have to really dig your heels into their sides and kick them in order to make them go. You have to pull real hard when you want them to stop.
21. As you're walking along with this unruly horse, they often decide to do their own thing, or turn to eat grass or bushes on the side of the road. These horses that haven't been trained as well are much more difficult to harness and control. So as you can see, horses are a lot like children.
Start Training Early with Good Discipline and Boundaries!
22. If you start training children from the very beginning, then they'll grow to love and respect you, and during their young formative years they will rarely stray from the straight and narrow, and it will usually only require a slight tug on the reins of the bridle to get them back in line. However, once they start making their own choices‚ and the Lord starts holding them partially accountable for those choices‚ it's a whole different ballgame.
23. The foundation of good discipline and boundaries you've given them certainly helps, but they also have to make the choices for good and for the Lord. Often when they're in the process of that, they can give you a pretty hard time, but all through that time you have to remain firm and loving, steady, and very prayerful as to how the Lord would have you handle things.
24. In any case, training children right from the very beginning saves a whole lot of heartache later on, and even if and when you do encounter difficulties‚ you've given them a solid foundation of fear of the Lord, and a healthy respect for the ways of living and the laws of life, which will help both them and you and make things a whole lot easier. Whereas some of our Family kids nowadays are like wild, unruly, untamed horses that are just running wild‚ because they're not being trained and held in as they should be! You parents have just got to take control of the reins and pull them in and teach and train them!
25. Some of our kids are so unruly, you wouldn't know the difference between Family children and those who aren't in the Family! Some of our children are like miniature Rambos, and they sound like walking televisions. Beloved, these things ought not so to be!
26. If you parents can't rule your own spirits, your own children, then how are you ever going to be able to control your own house, much less rule anyone else? Having loving discipline and taking control of your kids is not impossible. It is possible to lovingly teach and train your children, yet at the same time remain firm and solid in your convictions.
Standards and Consequences!
27. The worst thing for kids is not knowing what the standard is and not knowing what's expected of them. If they know that they'll be punished for breaking a certain rule, then you can be sure they'll try to avoid breaking it. Of course, sometimes temptation will get the most of them and they will break that rule you've set down anyway. That's where the punishment comes in, and that acts as a deterrent to keep them from breaking the rule again. They're a lot less likely to ever break that rule again than they are to break one which has no consequences or punishment.
28. However, if there are never any consequences, the wildness of the children comes out. They try to test you and see how much they can get away with. Kids hate to be nagged, just like you hate to be nagged, and pretty soon they don't even listen to you anymore. If you want to keep your kids under control, then you'd better set down some guidelines and rules and also some punishments for breaking the laws of your Home and family.
29. What ever happened to good old-fashioned discipline? The parents are the head of the family, and the children are supposed to obey those that have the rule over them and submit themselves to their parents.
30. But there is a catch; you parents have to watch for their souls. You've got to watch out for their souls and make sure they're growing and progressing in the right direction, because you're going to have to give account before the Lord one of these days. When you come before the Lord on that day, will you be able to do it with joy? Or will you be covered in grief, knowing that you didn't teach and train your children and rule your house with loving discipline?
31. If children know what's expected of them‚ they'll usually keep within those bounds. But if there are no bounds, then the wildfire just spreads. The longer you leave the forest fire of your children's behavior unattended‚ the further it will grow and spread and the more it will destroy!
32. If you don't put out the fires of unruly behavior, disrespect, disobedience, and unloving behavior as soon as they start creeping in, then you're going to have quite a brush fire to fight one of these days! You may not be able to salvage all of the trees; you may not be able to salvage your children's lives for the Lord.
33. I believe in giving children a lot of love, but I also believe in laying down the law and making it easy for them to be good. By having rules and guidelines and putting a bit of a bite with your bark, you'll be making things easier for your children. You'll be ensuring their future happiness and, most importantly, you'll be making their life and future service for the Lord simpler and more problem-free. There is so much in the Word about discipline, but it seems that some of you parents are overlooking most of that good counsel about the care of your children.
34. It may be a fight to help your kids get back on track and steer them in the right direction if they've been used to ruling the house and doing as they please. But the sooner you pull in the reins and help them to stay on the right track, the better. The longer you put it off, the harder it will become, and the greater the personal loss will be to you and your family!
Check Your Own Heart First!
35. If your kids are in a sad state‚ then I'd suggest you ask the Lord what you, as their parents, can do to rectify the situation. When your children have problems, you need to look at your own heart and see what areas you need to work on and improve in. You need to see what areas of their care and discipline you're slacking off in. You need to see what areas in your personal life you aren't following closely in.
36. Usually when people excuse others, it's because they want others to excuse them. This can often be the case when the discipline of the children is left to disintegrate in the wind. Perhaps the parents aren't obeying in a certain area of their lives, and so they excuse their children and don't feel that they can crack down on them and their bad behavior.
37. The first step to having the faith and conviction to bring your children back to the standard of the Word is to check your own hearts and see whether you're following the Word as closely as you should be. Once you've determined that you're following closely and doing your best for the Lord, loving Him with all of your heart and hearing from Him in prophecy about your lives and the lives of your children, then you can go about helping your children and drawing them closer to the standard of the Word.
38. It can be done, folks! Having well-mannered, well–behaved, sweet, respectful, dedicated kids can be achieved. If you're staying close to the Lord and hearing from Him each step of the way and for each of your children, if you're following the Word closely, if you're keeping a uniform standard, if you're showing your kids lots of love and care, then you're bound to succeed. It all boils down to taking your responsibility as a parent seriously.
Are You a Faithful Keeper of the Jewels?
39. Just think, the Lord's entrusted some precious jewels into your care! Maybe you have one, maybe you have 14. It doesn't really matter how many. Are you being a faithful keeper of the jewels? Are you shining them and buffing them and cleaning them and keeping them safe in your care? Or are you allowing them to get dirty, chipped, broken or cloudy?
40. The jewels are your responsibility because the Master Jeweler has given them into your care. Are you going to keep them safely under the shadow of your care? Are you going to shine them and make them even more beautiful? Or are you going to shirk your responsibility, cast your jewels before the swine, and allow them to get dirty and lose their worth?
41. I know that as faithful caretakers of the jewels, you will want to do all you can to keep the children that the Lord has given you with all diligence. You will want to do all you can to keep them happy, inspired‚ close to Jesus and full of His love. Then when you get to Heaven‚ you'll be able to present your showcase before the Master Jeweler, and He'll say, "Well done, thou good and faithful servant! You have been faithful to keep these jewels with all diligence! Enter thou into the joy of the Lord."
42. When you get to Heaven, you'll be able to present your children before their Heavenly Father and He'll say, "Well done, My good and faithful parents! You have been faithful to care for and love these, My children, that I have placed in your care. You were faithful to lovingly keep them on the straight and narrow way, and you raised them up as stars that will shine forever and ever. Each of your children will be as a star in your crown forever and ever. Enter thou into the joy of your Lord!"
43. Won't that be well worth it, to hear those words "well done" when you get to Heaven? Hearing that "well done" will make it worth it all! Every sacrifice will vanish into oblivion! Every trial will diminish and be forgotten! Every burden you had to carry in the care of your children will disappear with the joy that you'll feel on that day!
44. So keep your children diligently. Know the state of your flock and look well to your herds. Hold their reins securely, and lovingly lead them in the right direction. It won't be long now, and each of your children will be greatly used in the years to come—on this Earth and in Heaven and the world Beyond.
45. All of the training that you pour into them will not be wasted. Each and every talk time, each and every time of prayer, each and every time in the Word will count unto you as righteousness and will count unto them as valuable training for the future.
46. Children are our future. They are my vision of the future, my hope—and most of all, they're the Lord's children. He's counting on you to train them so that He can use them for His glory. Please don't fail Him or shirk your God-given responsibility to care for, love and discipline these, the jewels of the future! (End of message.)
ML #3274:1-14, 20-22, 51-54, 60-68, 194-210, GN 878
1. (Mama:) I love you very much! A few months ago you received three GNs about our children's behavior and the Lord's admonition to "hold on to the reins," which I pray were a blessing for you. As I was praying more about the topic, I felt the need to share with you more of the messages we've received from the Lord about the need to discipline, and specifically why we discipline, and the importance of beginning to train your children at a young age. I was especially concerned for you young parents, as we've heard and seen that many of you have a hard time disciplining your children for a variety of reasons.
2. I want to clarify right from the beginning that discipline means training your children—training them to lead a disciplined life, and eventually to discipline themselves. If discipline is something that you only do "to" children, the end result will be that as soon as they get out from under your control, they go wild. But if you discipline them in the sense that you teach them and train them to lead disciplined lives, then the end result is that eventually they're able to discipline themselves for the most part.
3. So in these messages from Jesus where He talks about the need for discipline, He's not just talking about correction or the consequences for unacceptable behavior—although that is a very important part of it. He's talking about the training that your little ones need, the step-by-step teaching, the instruction, the boundaries and guidelines, the good sample and the consistency.
4. The dictionary definition of discipline is: "1. To train by instruction and practice, especially to teach self-control to. 2. To teach to obey rules or accept authority. 3. To punish in order to gain control or enforce obedience." So while correction is a necessary part of teaching and training your children, it's only one small part—although it can be one of the most difficult parts. Here's a little message from Jesus, where He defines what discipline is.
5. (Jesus speaking:) The word "discipline" means different things to different people, and in truth there are several definitions. I have combined these‚ and in these messages when I refer to "discipline" or tell you of the need for discipline‚ I mean all of these things:
6. Loving‚ gentle training and teaching; clear definitions between right and wrong; boundaries set up for your child's good, and yes, correction or consequences when those boundaries are crossed; good samples set forth for your children of abiding by the rules for living life; and most of all, a firm foundation of My Word and My unconditional love for them to hold them steady through life.
7. All of this is part of My definition of discipline. It's much more than correction or punishment—although that has its place, and many times is the most difficult part for parents. Discipline must involve loving correction if it is to be well rounded and effective, but the gentle training and teaching, boundaries and consequences must be present as well. (End of message from Jesus.)
Reasons Why Some Don't Discipline
8. (Mama:) Those of you who are parents or who have carried shepherding responsibilities can probably relate to what I'm talking about when I say that it's very difficult sometimes to mete out correction. It hurts‚ and often you'd almost do anything to not have to talk to the person or administer the correction to the child‚ because you know that it's going to temporarily hurt them, they're going to cry, and it's going to be very difficult. You love them and you don't want to see them hurt. You wish with all your heart that there was some way to get around it, that they could learn the lesson some easier way.
9. But because you do love them, you know from the Word that discipline is good for us—it "yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to them who are exercised by it," and it will actually keep them from being hurt much worse later. Discipline is never easy at the time—for the parent or the child—but in the long run it bears good fruit.
10. I know there are a variety of reasons why some of you have a hard time disciplining your children, or struggle with that area of their training. The Lord also understands that there are many factors that have hindered you from having full faith to commit to lovingly disciplining your children. But He also gives the solution, right here in this next message.
11. (Jesus speaking:) I know there are many things that contribute to the problem of some of the little ones not getting the training and correction that they need. There are many reasons why some of you don't have a desire to discipline, and there are yet other reasons why some of you who do have the desire to lovingly discipline don't follow through with it.
1) Some of you have had bad experiences and memories of the past. Maybe you felt you were over-disciplined as a child, or you suffered some discipline that you felt was unfair‚ and you're trying to avoid doing the same thing with your children.
2) Some of you have more passive personalities and try to stay away from confrontations with your children.
3)You've seen some of your peers, or other children‚ who you know received consistent or strict discipline all their lives turn out to be very wild or even rotten–apple teens. You feel that's a backlash from the discipline they received, and you're trying to avoid the same thing happening with your kids.
4)You don't feel qualified to discipline your kids or that you'll be able to be consistent, so you wonder why you should even bother.
5)You don't want to go to the extreme with your kids, so you've opted not to discipline much at all.
6)You may not have much time with your children each day‚ and you don't want to make them unhappy and upset during that time by disciplining them. You want to enjoy them and you want them to enjoy you, and you feel that discipline ruins a happy parent-child relationship.
7)You try so hard to be "understanding" of your child that you wind up excusing them for nearly everything they do, rather than understanding them but still teaching them what is and what is not acceptable behavior.
8)You don't know if discipline even works. You wonder if the kids will eventually learn the same lessons on their own, without the hard work of your trying to teach it to them. Maybe you haven't personally seen the good results of loving, consistent discipline, or the negative results of a lack of it. You lack the motivation to persevere with your own children because you're unsure if it's even worth it or the right thing to do. You'll begin to see it as your young ones grow and go through battles‚ but for many of you it's not yet to the point where you see clearly that many of the battles your children experience are due to a lack of discipline—consistent, loving, fair and gentle guidance and training.
9)You haven't been able to agree with your mate or with the other members of the Home about the discipline standard for the kids, so you haven't established rules and guidelines to go by.
10)Discipline is a lot of work and you're just very busy; you haven't given it the priority it should have. Also, when you're with your kids, you're often very tired and don't feel up to disciplining them.
11)You feel horrible when you have to discipline your child or make them cry, and you try to avoid it at all costs.
12)You've seen bad samples of people using discipline to unleash their frustrations on a child‚ or disciplining only when they're angry. To you it seems like the more patient and loving thing to do is to let things pass and not discipline.
13)In order to discipline fairly, the children have to be challenged and happy and busy—not bored or left on their own. Otherwise it's unfair to them to expect them to behave if they're not motivated and overseen. Your Home is trying to get on its feet in some areas and the kids have not been as high a priority as other matters, so they don't receive the supervision and "quality care" that they need to stay busy and be happy. You want to start "when you can get organized," but that just keeps being put off.
14)Some of you lack discipline in your own lives.
15)Some parents have a very hard time accepting or believing that their children are misbehaving and need correction or discipline, regardless of what others try to point out or mention.
16)The fear of court cases and persecution makes it difficult to know how to discipline your kids without feeling like you might be putting yourself in danger of losing them.
17)The worldly climate of the day is that it's not politically correct to discipline, especially any kind of fair and loving corporal punishment, and so you've adopted the mindset that disciplining and correcting your kids is a thing of the past, that the "modern" way is to let your children make their own decisions and learn for themselves as they do what they please.
18)Maybe you're not so familiar with the Word on the subject, and you feel that part of the new day is taking more of the "understanding approach" with your children, rather than clear guidelines‚ consequences, and consistent discipline. After all, "love is the most important thing," you reason, so discipline gets put off or neglected, even though it's a part of love.
12. All these are contributing factors, yet the solution is very simple. You must simply decide to believe My Word, and I will help you to overcome the past and any mindsets that hold you back. You must simply decide, "Yes, I believe the Lord's Word. I believe that our Family standard about discipline is right. I believe that no matter what I see or cannot see, I must ask the Lord what my child needs specifically and follow through on it in accordance with the standard of the Word, for the good of my child."
13. You, My dear parents, must get on board in this area and make the decision. Read up on it in My Word if you feel weak in faith. (See the accompanying list of references, "What the Word has to say about discipline and training.") Part of the reason you lack the faith is because you're weak in the Word in this area. Ask for prayer; ask Me to help you see it clearly, to give you the burden. It seems like such a big task to you, and it's true‚ it is. But once you make the decision and commitment before Me, I can help you much more with the training of your children. You won't have to always be wondering, "What do I do now? Should I discipline or not?" because I will be there speaking to you in your heart, showing you what to say, how to speak to your little one, how to express your love in the form of discipline‚ for this is an important part of love.
14. When you make this decision to accept your role as a parent, a teacher, a trainer of your children‚ then I am able to give you My full anointing for the task. You have Heavenly helpers at your beck and call, waiting to fill in for you, to strengthen you, to anoint you and be through you all that you must be. You don't have to be perfect or the perfect parent—just avail yourself of the help of Heaven! (End of message.)
20. (Mama: ) The fact of the matter is, children need discipline—the Bible says so. They not only need it in order to grow up to be productive and useful members of society—whether in the Family or not—but they need it in order to be happy and secure in their relationship with you, their parents. We in the Family aren't the only ones who believe that either—there are plenty of experts in the field of child education and development who will tell you the same thing—that children need and want their boundaries to be defined, and that they're much more happy and secure when they receive loving discipline from their parents and caretakers if they cross those boundaries.
21. You've probably heard how Dad referred to Dr. Spock, a famous pediatrician and well-known author of childcare books who died a few years ago, and how he ruined a whole generation of children through advising the "permissive" approach—that children will automatically learn what's right and wrong and set their own limits and boundaries without any guidance. (See ML #606:70,71.)
22. Well, 30 years after his book was first published, Dr. Spock had second thoughts. In 1974, when he was 70, he called for a return to the more disciplined practices of his own childhood and apologized to parents who had, upon his instruction, raised a generation of "balky, pesky and bratty" children. "This is a cruel deprivation that we professionals (he named child psychiatrists, psychologists, teachers, social workers and "pediatricians like myself" as guilty) have imposed on fathers and mothers," he wrote in a Redbook magazine column. In other words, children do need discipline.
51. (Jesus: ) The cornerstone of parenting and teaching your children about Me and My Word is laid with consistent discipline. They must learn to respect and obey you, their parent‚ if they are going to later respect and obey Me, their Heavenly Father. If they don't learn that you mean what you say, how will they know that when I ask them to do something, I mean it and expect them to do it? If they don't learn from you in the small things that when they behave unlovingly they reap sorrowful consequences‚ how will they know later in life that to love is to be blessed, and to be unloving is to invite sadness and heartache?
52. These are simple, basic lessons of the spirit, which they learn day by day with you‚ their parents. They either learn the right way or they're given a false sense of reality if you don't teach them. These are not things that are learned in a day, or in one or two incidents; they're slowly absorbed through everyday life, through your sample‚ and through your instruction to them and following through and teaching them to heed that instruction, and that is all part of the loving discipline that I'm asking you to give My little ones.
53. You are My hands, My gentle parents. I've given you great natural love for your children—not so that you would withhold the loving staff of correction and instruction, but so that you would administer it gently and with love, even as I do to you. To withhold it is not love, but rather permissiveness. Permissiveness might win you temporary favor with your children, but in the long run, as they grow and begin to search for their boundaries, you'll find that they're much more secure and happy and bonded with you, their parent, if you've laid down guidelines for them and are teaching them to live within those guidelines.
54. This is your job and ministry as a parent: To be My hands‚ My eyes, My lips, My love, and to lovingly guide your children as I guide you. (End of message.)
60. (Jesus:) Discipline starts early. Some children have more submissive and obedient personalities, and others more active and boisterous personalities. But the guidelines you set and the discipline you give them as very young children, before they go into the "terrible twos," will last a lifetime and have a great deal to do with shaping their character and even their future obedience and submissiveness to My will. If they're permitted to do as they please when young, this can oftentimes carry over into adulthood with weaknesses of selfishness, unyieldedness and disobedience.
61. You must realize that you're not just working with a child, but that you are forming an adult. You are helping them to grow and mature just as I am helping you to grow and mature. Your child is to you what you are to Me. You are little children in My sight, and although I do sometimes give you much leeway, I also have certain boundaries and give you safeguards and correction. This is the sample you should follow when raising your own children—giving them unconditional love, but at the same time giving them the rules and discipline standards to grow by. Otherwise they grow in body but not in spirit.
62. It is through hearing and obeying My Word that they will grow—and they learn that through learning obedience from you. If they are allowed to do as they please, their spirits do not learn maturity‚ love, obedience, faithfulness, which are cornerstones of a loving life. And so it is, that without loving consistent discipline, their spirits do not grow as they should.
63. Children learn and understand more than most people realize. They can also sense and feel things more than people realize because they're fresher from Heaven with a channel that doesn't have as much static yet, and in some ways are more sensitive to things around them or things that are going to happen. They can learn important principles at a very young age. Although they may not understand them in words, they understand the idea or the feeling.
64. They understand love, sharing, giving, correction, and many other things. They don't have to wait until they're six or seven years old, but they can begin to understand those concepts very young if they are taught, and sometimes to start later than two or three can be starting too late.
65. Of course‚ all these things have to be tempered with a lot of love and reassurance at the same time. You shouldn't give correction without giving love during and after the correction, or set guidelines without explanations, just as I don't do that with you.
66. When your child is young, that's the time for them to grow in these areas of giving and learning to be obedient, and learning that they're not always able to do what they want all the time whenever they want, throwing fits if they don't get their way. If they learn that lesson early on, it will serve them well throughout life.
67. You shouldn't be discouraged or disappointed in your children when they misbehave and need some training, correction and discipline, or see it as a sign that you've failed or that they're ruined for life. They won't be perfect, just as you are not perfect, and they will likely need lots of guidance, and loving, consistent discipline through their growing years as they learn these lessons. It's part of life, part of growing and maturing, and one of the ways that you as a parent help to teach them about life is through the loving discipline you give them when they need it.
68. Seek Me for your child, and ask Me about their behavior, and I will show you how to present these lessons lovingly and in a way that will be the easiest for them to understand and grow by. Every child is different‚ and every child has special needs. So if you want to be the best parent possible and want to learn to discipline your children with the most love and fairness, ask Me about each situation, and I will help you find the key. (End of message.)
194. (Jesus:) Today is the day! Today is the day to begin anew—to call out to Me for My help and wisdom, and for the love and faithfulness to be consistent with the care and discipline of My little lambs. I know you don't have the strength within you. I know it's exhausting, draining, and you feel as if it sucks the very life out of you at times—and it does! Virtue goes out of you when you pour out, pouring into someone else. Even I felt it when I gave and gave and gave, and felt I had no more to give. I had to rise early and seek My Father for the strength and grace and love that I needed to carry on.
195. So it is with disciplining children. It's a day in, day out responsibility—something that never takes a day off, never goes away, and is always with you. This is one of the main reasons why so few choose to discipline the way they're supposed to—because it's so much hard work, and once you start, if you stop and then try to start again, you find that you've lost much ground and have to backtrack.
196. Disciplining is one of a parent's greatest responsibilities, a large part of love‚ and it is My hand in the child's life. My love is largely manifest to them in the form of consistent, loving, gentle and fair discipline. If they're treated harshly, roughly, too strictly, inconsistently, or not given clear boundaries, it reflects directly on Me and how they perceive My love for them. They learn to love and know Me through the training which they're given from their parents, and a large part of that training comes from the way the parents handle the discipline.
197. So you see, it's very important! It's how they will come to know Me, My ways‚ and My love. If they're lovingly shown the right path and experience the consequences when they disobey, they'll learn the important principle that I cannot bless disobedience. If they're treated with love and fairness, they'll come to appreciate My justice and how I reward people according to their works. If they experience mercy, love, and understanding, they'll also feel My mercy, My love, and will be freer to express themselves‚ knowing that I always understand. If they have clear boundaries set, they'll come to be secure in My love and My ways, knowing the right from the wrong, and learning to do the loving thing.
198. These are all foundation stones in their training, and there's no other way that they can learn them at this young age, save through loving care and discipline, which you must give them. Yes, if they do not receive discipline as children, then I must discipline them when they're older, and they may in time learn the same lessons and come around to the same conclusions. But oh, how much easier it is for them to learn now, when they're young, moldable, and eager to absorb and take in! Now their values in life are being formed, the morals which they will stand by, and the foundation of their love for Me and their fear of Me.
199. If these things are lacking when they're grown, then for all that I want to use them I have no foundation. This is the time of building that foundation—stone upon stone‚ day by day. It's a tiresome job, a wearying job‚ and one that requires much love, patience, and wisdom. I know that you don't have that in yourself, but I have it here for you if you'll receive it.
200. Many parents look at the daunting task before them and they feel they'll not be able to finish it, so they don't even try. They're discouraged before they even begin, for they know that they don't have the strength within them. Yes‚ I know that you do not, but I've made it that way so that you might call out to Me on a regular basis to receive new insight, new wisdom, new strength, and most of all, an infilling of My love for this very important task. It's not something that can be accomplished in your own strength; it's the molding and shaping of a life, and only I have the wisdom and the knowledge of what's best for the precious little one.
201. Many things may change as their little hearts change. Many different things may be needed as they make decisions and grow and progress. Continuing with one set plan or method will not work, and will only harm in the end. That's why I've made it so that you must cry out to Me for My wisdom, My strength, and My love. For I know that you must have new direction and leading on a regular basis‚ in order to meet the changing needs of your child.
202. My loves, I know the task seems daunting, but I need you to do it. It's part of your responsibility as parents to be My hands, My eyes, My love, My care in your child's life. Without loving and consistent discipline, a large part of the foundation is missing‚ and in the days to come the building will be unsteady.
203. You may look at your little one now and think: "But it's so much more difficult to try and make them do the right thing. It's much easier for me to bend to their wishes than try to get them to bend to mine. Maybe I'm just being selfish by trying to get them to follow a schedule. Maybe I'm being too harsh when I enforce a rule. They cry and make a big scene, and sometimes are grumpy for the rest of the morning. Maybe it's just unnecessary and I should just live with it and wait till they're older before trying to get them to obey. Right now they need their childhood and their freedom, and I don't want to take that away from them."
204. My dear ones‚ you're not taking away any of their happiness by giving them loving discipline. To the contrary, you're building a foundation for security, love, and the great happiness of knowing My will and following it. So instead of depriving them of something, you're giving them a great gift. You're showing them how to live life to the full by My rules of love. In the end, that will bring the greatest happiness! You're preparing them to receive Me—My will, My law of loving and Godly living. This is a foundation stone for life, and without it, they'll have to learn the hard way and life will be much more painful.
205. You might say, "But how is teaching them to pick up their blocks or come when I call them going to prepare them for life? When they're older, they won't even remember these small things, and when they're older they'll be able to learn easily, for they'll understand more clearly."
206. This is not so, My dear parents. For though they may not remember these tiny instances, these little instances are molding and shaping your little one's character now‚ and they are preparation for the next grade. If they're not taught these lessons now, the lessons are much more difficult in the next class—and yet more difficult in the next‚ and the next‚ and the next. When the child is full grown, if he still hasn't learned them, then the stakes are very high and the price is much unhappiness and hurt—for both him and others.
207. So though it may be much labor for you now, it's a labor of love—for it is in love for your child that you teach them about life and how to live lovingly. It is My love for them, manifested in the form of loving discipline and training which you give them. Please be My love for your little one. Don't let it slide, feeling that it will hurt them or deprive them, or that it's too much work for you, or that you don't know how to complete it because you don't have the wisdom, and so you don't begin at all. I will help you, teach you, and instruct you through My Word.
208. I'll be your strength when you're weak, your help when you're tired. I'll do the work that you can't do—that of working in the heart of your little ones and guiding them from within. But I can't do that without your help. We must be a team, you and I, to train our little ones aright. I have great need of them in the days to come, and that preparation on Earth began at the day of their birth, and continues today. So let's follow the plan, let's have a good balance, and see what love can do!
209. This is not to say that there must be many rules, or very strict and unbending rules, or harsh correction. That is just as damaging as no discipline at all‚ for it will make them rebel. But there must be clear boundaries set out, and there must be consequences if the child crosses those boundaries. The key for you, My darling parents‚ is to remember that this is a great part of love, and that it's a very necessary part of your child's preparation for the days to come.
210. Thank you for your willingness to be My hands, My eyes, My love for them. I love them dearly‚ and will love them through you. I love you! (End of message.)
ML #3388:44-74, 83-118, GN 984
44. (Jesus:) Essentially, the root of the problem [why parents don't discipline] is compromise and lethargy. And unfortunately, just as compromise has seeped into many areas of people's spiritual lives and walk with Me, so it has been the hole in the dike which allowed the Enemy's lies, worldly attitudes and mindsets to seep into the very important area of rearing and raising children within My Endtime Family.
45. Many Family members have allowed their minds, eyes and ears to be infected with the Enemy's propaganda, attitudes and mindsets when it comes to raising children. Many parents have looked more to current worldly leanings, writings, theories, teachings and philosophies on raising children than to My Word, teachings and standard. They've listened more to worldly counselors, and even System relatives and parents, than to My voice, My written Word, My elders and My veteran parents, from whom they could learn much.
46. The evil demon of lethargy has lulled many into a sleepy stupor when it comes to child training, causing them to be short-sighted in vision; weak, indecisive, wishy–washy, lacking the strength to train the children aright, and specifically to discipline their children when needed. Because of lethargy, many lack the strength and the perseverance to follow through when it comes to discipline.
47. Raising children requires hard work, much sacrifice, unconditional love, long hours‚ prayer, seeking Me, talking and reasoning with children, explaining My principles and values to them, and pouring into them. A key factor in training and raising children is consistency of training and discipline in order for your efforts to be rewarded. Lethargy and its companion, laziness, have stolen the strength of consistency in discipline from many parents. Their desire and vision to follow through with consistent discipline has slowly ebbed away.
48. Because the parents' sample has been weakened and watered down through compromise—and they know it—they lack the faith to be firm with their own children. Little disobediences are the by-product of compromise and lethargy, and have become the "cigars" in the way of the parents' connection with Me. [See ML #604:1-3.] These "cigars" of disobedience have caused the parents to waver and lack faith to uphold My standard when it comes time to discipline their own children, for they know they're not hitting the mark in many areas of their own lives.
49. They haven't looked to Me for the answers‚ nor to the written Word on the subject of child training, but they've looked more readily to the standard of the world and the many unhealthy worldly attitudes on raising children, which the Enemy fosters and feeds the masses.
50. No longer have they separated themselves in this way from the world, but have allowed their minds and hearts to be swayed in the wrong direction—toward leniency and a fuzzy, undefined form of discipline and standard. They've chosen to walk down the broad road the world has paved for child-rearing; the road that has no clearly defined borders or boundaries; the road that leads away from godliness and Christian behavior, and instead toward waywardness, "anything goes," the "let kids be kids" mindset‚ "let them be, they'll learn eventually," unruliness, lack of self–control, unhappiness, and eventual destruction. This is the road the Devil is paving very carefully for the children of the world, for slowly he seeks to secure them soundly as his—children who have no morals and no standards, and whose parents have no control, power or authority over them.
51. The Enemy has duped the world into believing that discipline—and especially any form of physical discipline like moderate reasonable spanking or even swatting—is detrimental and harmful in every way to the child's mental and emotional growth. This is a very powerful damaging lie, which has now become firmly entrenched in the world, and unfortunately, many of the young parents within the Family have also fallen for this lie. The Enemy has made the parents of the world afraid to discipline their children. They don't want to alienate their kids‚ nor do they want to suffer some trumped-up charges down the road, due to misunderstandings or false reports. Since they don't know what else to do, they have chosen to do nothing‚ but to simply hope for the best as they let their children go their own way.
52. You know, however, that a child left to himself brings his mother and father shame. What might look like the easy, non-confrontational path eventually becomes a bitter road full of heartbreak and regret. You, the children of David, have much more understanding and insight than the poor floundering parents in the world. You are without excuse. For you know the wise and loving boundaries of discipline, and you have at your disposal godly counsel on how to teach your children to obey, without breaking their spirits or driving them away in rebellion.
53. Unfortunately, however, many of you parents have not taken advantage of the wisdom and insight available, but you have allowed compromise and lethargy to pull you away from the godly standard, and you have become more and more like the lost, confused, wavering parents of the world. As a result‚ many of the children of the Family are looking more and more like children of the world. (End of message.)
54. (Mama: ) I doubt that this message is a surprise to many of you. Here again we see one of the many sad fruits of lethargy and compromise; it has stolen the strength of consistency in discipline from many of you parents. But that didn't happen from one day to the next. The Lord says it has "slowly ebbed away." Little by little you got off track.
55. I know you want to do what's right. Of course you love your children. But this lethargic, lazy parenting that you've now become so accustomed to that you hardly even recognize it‚ crept in slowly, one little compromise at a time. This is something worthy of serious reflection and prayer. Think back. Do you remember the times when the Lord's still, small voice was trying to get through to you, trying to motivate you to spend the time necessary to correct a problem, right a wrong attitude, or teach a lesson to your kids? But you blew it off, convinced yourself that it wasn't important, or that you could do it tomorrow, and gradually you didn't hear those checks anymore. That's what the Lord means when He says your desire and vision to follow through with consistent discipline has slowly ebbed away.
56. Another very key point that I know is hard for you moms and dads to hear is that part of your lack of faith to be firm with your kids is because your own lives are so compromised. You know how much kids hate hypocrisy, so you have felt you couldn't uphold the standard with your kids when you are guilty of many of the same sins. Are you allowing too much worldly influence in your life in the form of TV, sports, books, alcohol, Internet browsing, etc.? Have you become too lazy to get out witnessing like you know you should? Have you quit getting your daily Word time? Do you fail to exercise your gift of prophecy or take your prayer vigils? Do you eat a lot of junk food, and not exercise? If that describes your lifestyle, then it's no wonder you don't have the faith and conviction to expect your kids to uphold the standard in the Word.
57. If you're not deep in the Word, really close to the Lord yourselves, but instead have become deeply entrenched in the System, then you can be sure you're getting a lot of ungodly input on child-rearing. The System is full of propaganda that screams‚ "Don't discipline your kids." That's the way of the world—total independence, no boundaries‚ just let kids have their way. Unless you've actively fought to put on the Lord's mind in this area, to keep your attitudes in line with the Word, you can be sure you have strayed and been weakened by the world! You can't just passively sit back and expect that you'll have the right reactions. You have to fight to be right with the Lord and cleansed from the System. You have to be aggressive and take initiative to be doers of the Word! You have to work to be in the world but not of it! And if you haven't actively, aggressively, determinedly, seriously and desperately kept your mind clean through the Word‚ then the chances are very great that you're polluted by System propaganda.
58. The Devil is on the attack! He's not sitting around, passively letting things develop on their own. He has gone to war to destroy the youth of today, and he is especially interested in our kids! He wants to make you afraid to discipline your kids. He wants you to think it's a thing of the past to expect obedience, respect and adherence to the boundaries you and your Home set. Don't you see? He wants you to be just like all the hopeless, lost, mixed-up parents of the world! That's exactly what he's doing! And in many cases, he's succeeding!
59. If you haven't recognized his attacks and taken definite steps to fight back, then at this point in time you're losing the battle, whether you realize it or not! Quit being dead in the spirit and oblivious to the Enemy's plan. Wake up! I know you love your kids, but do you act like it? Don't let the evil spirit of lethargy blind you to the spiritual warfare. Fight back! Get serious with the Lord! Get rid of the compromises in your own life, put on the Lord's mind, and be a doer of the Word, so you can expect your children to obey and respect you and do the right things.
60. Here is more insight on the root of our parenting problems.
61. (Jesus: ) Problem parents suffer from a variety of problems‚ which can be attributed to the spirit of lethargy and its influence, although there is also more to it than that.
62. One major problem is that some have harbored doubts and have not believed My Words of instruction—My Words in the Bible, My Words through David, and My Words through recent prophecies regarding the training of your children and the importance of discipline. Some have given My Word and My standard mental acceptance, but haven't really followed through on living and behaving as I have instructed. Others, who are further astray, have made conscious decisions that they would not discipline their children, or at least not in such–and-such a manner, or that they wouldn't be as strict as their parents were, or as others who they disagreed with were. Some parents do claim to believe in discipline, but their idea of what constitutes discipline is amiss, and also, they may or may not really believe that the bad fruits of not disciplining are as serious as they've been made out to be.
63. This is a serious foundation problem—a problem of disbelief, of lack of faith in My Word, and lack of obedience to it. This is a problem that is very difficult to correct—although, of course, possible—because it requires a complete change in mindset and attitude on the part of the parents. It requires them to mentally and physically accept something that they've been resisting, struggling with, simply ignoring, or actually rejecting for many years—My standard and viewpoint on discipline. Many have distorted or incorrect ideas of what discipline means, or of what the right standard is, and when you start off on a misguided foundation, everything goes downhill from there.
64. The other major factor that has affected many is laziness, leading to self-indulgence, as well as indulgence toward their children. It takes a lot of diligent effort and faithful follow-up to discipline and train children properly, and that's a lot of work, as any parent or anyone who has cared for children knows! It's so much easier, or so it seems, to start to let things slide, to not ride herd on the kids, to ease up, to slack off, and sadly, many have taken this "easier" route.
65. You could compare it to the way many in the Family have looked at follow-up in witnessing: It has been promoted in the Word for years as a good thing, an important thing‚ even an essential thing, but look at how many people have not given it the time and attention it needed! It's taken months, or rather years now, of giving the call, promoting the tools, pushing the vision, and now it's happening in most places, but for many it was a big change of mindset. Was it because nobody knew follow-up was important? No. Was it because nobody wanted to do the right thing? No. It was mainly because it just seemed like so much work‚ so much trouble, and if it wasn't absolutely essential to the immediate day-to-day running of a Home and work, many opted to just not do it, or rather, to not really fully dive into it and immerse themselves in it, but to do as little as possible.
66. That's the way many people have gone about disciplining their children too. They know they have to have some standard, and will correct their kids on the majors or if they get way out of hand, but they're not really building a proper foundation; they're not giving the solid, Word-based training and consistent oversight and shepherding that is needed.
67. There are other related major problems too, such as parents who do discipline their children, but don't teach them self-control and self-discipline, and don't give them enough godly background and insight into what's right and wrong. These are children or teens who will behave themselves if with a strict adult, but when left to themselves or placed in a new situation will run riot and wreak havoc, because they're only obeying to please that adult, or out of fear of punishment, rather than out of love for Me or fear of Me. This fear of Me, which goes hand in hand with a personal relationship with Me, is an essential building block and foundation stone of good training and discipline that, sadly, many Family parents have neglected to train their children in.
68. It comes down to parents not including Me enough in their lives and in the lives of their children. If they were as close to Me as they should be, as filled with My Word as they should be, as believing of My Words as they should be, as full of faith and conviction as they should be, putting on My mind as they should be, then they would pass this on to their children through their teaching‚ and even through their very spirits and attitudes and daily lifestyles.
69. Another problem which is fairly widespread is parents who are not investing the time with their children to teach and train them and love them and give them the attention that they need, and so of course they lack the conviction to discipline their children, because they know they're not meeting their needs. Children need consistent love, teaching, training, input and care. Discipline is only one aspect of that. So those parents who are not making their children one of their primary focal points, who aren't willing to sacrifice and work hard to invest the time in teaching and giving their children the attention and quality time that they need, are generally very weak and compromised in the area of discipline as well. (End of message.)
70. (Mama:) Many parents don't discipline their kids because they don't believe in the standard put forth in the Word—the Bible and the Letters. Some parents say they believe, and they don't actively or consciously reject the Word, but they don't follow through, they don't live the Word‚ so that makes the Word of little effect. A mental acceptance or passive belief isn't enough if there isn't obedience to the Word. Others have made conscious decisions to not do what the Word says, primarily because they don't necessarily believe the counsel in the Word is the best way‚ and they want to do things differently. I'm sure it's no surprise to you that this is a common practice of many second-generation parents. They openly declare, "I will never discipline my child the way my parents (or teachers) disciplined me."
71. I'm not going to say that all you SGAs were disciplined well. Maybe some of your parents, teachers or shepherds were terrible disciplinarians. Maybe they were harsh and unrealistic. Some probably had problems with anger or they lost control. That is wrong.
72. But that's not what we're talking about here. Peter and I don't expect today's parents to follow bad samples of the past. That would be ridiculous. But to reject the godly counsel of the Word just because some people didn't apply it right is also ridiculous.
73. I'm not asking you SGA moms and dads to be harsh or unloving in your discipline. Maybe some of you were raised in that way and you've vowed you'd never be that way with your kids. But what you may not realize is that in trying so hard to not be like your parents or like Auntie so-and-so or Uncle so-and-so‚ you're becoming like the System! You've gone too far in your quest to do it your way; you've not only turned your back on past child discipline methods that you feel were wrong, which very well might have been wrong, but you've turned your back on the Word. You've thrown the proverbial baby out with the bathwater. So now your indulgent‚ too lenient, inconsistent approach to child-rearing lacks absolutes and solid boundaries. I'm sorry to say this, but if you keep that up, you'll eventually see the fruit of it in sad, rebellious, incorrigible children.
74. I ask you to please count the cost. Look ahead, into the future. Think of your kids when they're teenagers. The little fits and tantrums that you're ignoring today will turn into arguments, hatred, and even crime. Remember what the previous message said‚ because that's where you're headed: "…down the broad road the world has paved for child-rearing; the road that has no clearly defined borders or boundaries; the road that leads away from godliness and Christian behavior, and instead toward waywardness, 'anything goes,' the 'let kids be kids' mindset, 'let them be, they'll learn eventually‚' unruliness, lack of self-control, unhappiness, and eventual destruction. This is the road the Devil is paving very carefully for the children of the world, for slowly he seeks to secure them soundly as his—children who have no morals and no standards, and whose parents have no control, power or authority over them."
83. (Mama:) To expose the wrong attitudes among some of you SGA parents is not a popular subject, and you're probably not liking this very much. But it's serious, and as much as I don't want to upset or embarrass you, it's my responsibility to show you the error of your ways. I suppose it looks like I'm picking on you‚ when you probably know of many FGA parents who are also delinquent. Yes, that's true. I know of many too. I would venture to say, however, that much of the FGA problem is rooted in laziness, the second major problem the Lord brought out in the message you read earlier. It's not that they have necessarily rejected the Word. Well, some probably have, but it's not nearly as widespread with the FGAs as the SGAs. A majority of FGAs know the Word, both the Letters and the Bible, and they do believe‚ but they have become weary in well doing, especially those who have had many children.
84. I have heard that many FGA parents look more like grandparents now—indulgent and spoiling their children. They operate very differently than when their first kids were little. But as I said‚ I believe this is largely due to laziness, or because they're afraid that if they discipline their teenagers or set a strict standard of behavior for them, they will be unhappy and will decide to leave the Family. This too is a serious problem, and the result is the same—undisciplined, bratty, spoiled kids, sometimes rotten apples! But it's much easier to correct these problems than a lack of faith in the foundation of the Word, because when you have rejected the Word, as the Lord pointed out, you have to have a complete change in mindset and attitude. You have to accept something that you've been resisting, struggling with, ignoring or actually rejecting—the Lord's standard on discipline.
85. Because this takes such a huge step of faith‚ I asked the Lord for more on this. Faith cometh by hearing the Word. I didn't figure one little prophecy would be enough to convince you of the need to think and act differently, especially if you're one of the many people who have a great respect for the teachers, lecturers and gurus of the world. If you've been taking in their doctrines and studying their methods, then it will take some definite effort to be washed with the Word and to put on the Lord's mind on this matter.
86. It's up to you if you choose to believe what the Lord has to say. I can't make you believe it and change. But I want to warn you through the next two prophecies of what problems you will likely face in the future if you continue to refuse to give your children the consistent, loving, firm discipline they need.
87. These messages are directed to you younger parents. Please call on the keys for openness to this counsel, and know that I'm sharing these things with you because I love you and your children. Later there are more messages that apply equally to the FGAs, and the principles of these messages can be applied to all parents‚ regardless of age.
nThe minutes are ticking by ...
88. (Jesus:) The Enemy has come into the SGA ranks of My Family with a great deception and trickery‚ and that is in the area of raising and disciplining their children. He has gone to great lengths to parade the mistakes, failings, and shortcomings of their parents in their minds. He has taken care to blow up the negative and to flaunt in the SGAs' minds the fears and worries that they have about their children, under the guise of advising them to raise their children differently than their parents did. He has woven this together with their own battles as children and young teenagers, and has brought to mind the times when they felt hurt‚ mistreated, or overlooked. He has spun a very subtle and gentle yarn of untruth and distortion, which has swayed many SGAs toward a lenient, laid-back, overly tolerant viewpoint concerning the discipline of their children.
89. I look upon this leniency and this attitude with great sadness. My sadness comes from knowing that the path these SGAs are choosing to walk down in the training and discipline of their children will result in their children being unhappy, discontent‚ and difficult to satisfy and please. The SGA parents, in turn, will also find themselves at the destination of frustration, impatience, and sadness for not having trained their children aright. They will have to stand by and watch their children make their own choices without having a firm foundation to base their decisions on. They will not have the ability to guide their children‚ because their children will have lost respect for them and for their counsel. As they grow up, they will be determined to have things their own way, to be independent, to place themselves above the counsel of others, the good of the work and others, and most importantly, above My will and leading in their lives.
90. I'm not concerned with whether you SGAs choose to train and discipline your children like your parents did—that is not the point. The first generation as a whole did the best they could with their children. They poured the love, time, care, and attention they had into you SGAs and older teens. They also gave you all the Word and spiritual training they could. They gave their all for you, and though there were some lacks, they loved you. You can't deny that. They made mistakes; they failed in some areas. But you should know that every parent fails in some area, and I'm sorry to tell you that you SGAs who are parents are also failing in some areas. You're failing your children in not giving them the boundaries and the true love that they need in the form of discipline.
91. When children are young, it's the most important time to teach and train them. At the same time, however‚ when they are so young and still so influenced by normal young, childish behavior, it's also the most difficult time to see the consequences of lack of discipline. It's easy to excuse bad behavior by saying your child is just having a hard day, or is tired or grumpy, or is just being foolish and is unable to get full control of him or her self.
92. Young parents, the minutes are ticking by. Your children are being molded every day. The moldable clay of their little lives is hardening, and pretty soon you won't be able to change it. Sure, you will be able to bend a little here, and move an arm or leg this way or that way, but the overall character of your child and his or her foundation is now being set in the stone of their life. Once that is set, it's quite difficult to change. As a parent, your duty is to shape the clay of your child's heart, mind, and life‚ and show them how to dedicate themselves to Me and others. You are meant to show them how to live a godly life, how to discipline themselves, how to walk circumspectly.
93. I know that you don't like to be put in a box and told to conform to the way your parents did it. That's not what I'm telling you. My instruction to you is that you must get desperate to raise and train your children with love and godly discipline as I instruct you to in the Word. Forget about any mistakes your parents may have made. Can you trust Me? Can you trust your children to Me? I'm the One Who gave them to you in the first place. I'm the One you need to receive your instructions from. I'm the One you should be following when it comes to modeling your parenting and discipline skills.
94. How much have you sought Me about your children and their behavior problems? How much have you asked for My counsel? Have you been open to Me pointing out the weak areas in your parenting and discipline standard? Many of you have closed yourself off to outside help from the FGAs and other parents because you don't want to submit to someone else's idea of how you should train and raise your children. Well, it's leading you down the wrong path, and your children that you love so dearly are the primary ones who are going to suffer throughout their lives because of your decision to do it your way.
95. The instruction, counsel, and standard are all in the Word. You don't have to hear it from someone else if you'd just take the time to pick up the GNs and the older Word and study it. Then hear from Me about how to apply it to your own kids, and what tailor-made instruction and application they need, and then you'd be set! But right now many of you are shunning the Word on the subject, lumping it all together with the FGAs and the older parents who want to give you some counsel on how to train your kids. You figure that they're your kids, so you should be able to make the decisions that concern their lives and training, and you don't want anyone else to meddle or get involved, because they might mess things up and screw up your kids!
96. Well, I have news for you—they are My kids, and they're on loan to you! So if you plan to raise them as Christians, in the fear of Me and with godly admonition, then please listen to Me and heed My counsel and instruction about how to do it—which at times includes heeding the counsel of shepherds and other wise counselors who are My voice to you.
97. There is no perfect parent in the world‚ and while I know that you have the best of intentions, you will be missing the mark if you continue down the path of leniency and over-tolerance. If you aren't willing to discipline your children‚ then you're heading down the wrong road. And I'm not talking about harsh discipline—I'm talking about godly instruction and correction.
98. Will you think about it, please? Check your heart to see how much of My instruction and counsel to you about disciplining and training your children you have pushed aside and neglected or even rejected altogether. Please let go of the Enemy's ploy that's causing you to weaken your convictions and compromise in this area of raising your children to be solid Christians‚ disciples, and witnesses. Let go of how your parents raised you. Stop dwelling on the mistakes they made. Determine and decide today that you're going to raise your children the way I want you to.
99. Can you give not only your own life to Me, but also your children's lives and training? They are the hope of the future, and the only way they will become that hope is if they are trained aright, according to My Word, My counsel, My standard. (End of message.)
100. (Mama:) Please note where the Lord says that the most important time to train your kids is when they're young. You might excuse their problems now or think you'll tune into them later, when things "get serious," but it doesn't work that way. They're developing habits, personalities, and character now! They're building their relationship with the Lord now! Please don't let foolishness, shallowness‚ laziness or lethargy cause you to miss taking advantage of this most important time in your children's lives.
nDiscipline is part of love!
101. (Jesus: ) It saddens Me to hear of the second generation adopting this attitude of not wanting to raise their children the way their parents raised them. And then to use it as an excuse for not disciplining their kids is even more disheartening. I'm actually proud of the way your parents raised you SGAs! Granted, there were mistakes made. No one is perfect, and your parents are no exception. But they did their best to impart to you My love and a foundation in My Word and godly principles. This is one of the foundation stones of your faith, and one of the main reasons that you're here today, storing up rewards in Heaven, and doing the most important and well-paying job in the world!
102. I'm also proud of each one of you of the second generation who are still here and serving Me. You have hung on through a lot, and you have received a wealth of training and wisdom that is beyond your years. So when I look at you, I see success! And a good part of that success is attributed to your parents and the way they raised you. They raised you according to My Biblical principles and in My nurture and admonition. They raised you according to My teachings—the Word, the standard.
103. Not only is this sort of attitude a direct hit at your parents and all the hard work, time, love, and sacrifice they poured into raising you, but it's a direct hit at My Word, My godly principles, and David's teachings.—Not to mention all the written Word the Family has received over the years on the subject of childcare and raising children in My nurture and admonition. It hurts Me when I hear this. It's a slap in My face and in the face of all My first-generation parents, many of whom gave up much and sacrificed much to raise you, sometimes in adverse conditions on poor mission fields.
104. Granted‚ some parents were stricter than others, but they did the best they could, knowing they were raising disciples‚ and for the most part did their best to pour into you the training and Word that had been poured into them. Training and discipline were part of their lives‚ and they knew from the standard of My Word and Biblical principles that it was part of their duty to train you, My gifts to them, in the way that you should go.
105. Now the following may come as a shock to some of you—especially those of you who have decided to embrace the worldly attitudes of leniency and very little discipline—but it's better to err on the side of being too strict than not strict enough. Many people of all ages testify to this—that even if they felt their parents were too strict with them and it was hard on them in some ways, still, they acknowledge the long-term fruit it has borne in their lives as opposed to leniency and indulgence.
106. The repercussions of being too lenient and indulgent are far more hazardous to your children's spiritual and emotional development than being too strict, especially nowadays when the line between right and wrong behavior is slowly becoming hazier and more undefined with each passing year. This is all part of the Enemy's plan to pull the next generations into the gray zone of muddied and confused morals, values, and behavior, to draw them away from Me, away from light, away from the truth.
107. Correction and discipline are part of My love to all My children—young and old. Those I love‚ I rebuke and chasten. Those who are My children I purge, strengthen, guide, and instruct. If I do this in your lives to draw you closer to Me, to strengthen you, to purge you, to make you more fruitful, should you do any less with your children? Should you extend them any less love and care than I extend to you? Do you place yourselves and your carnal wisdom and reasoning above Me and My ways and what I know to be the best for you and your children, whom I have created?
108. Just as it is a manifestation of My love and care in your life that I correct you and provide you with clear boundaries, clear do's and don'ts, so I expect you to do the same with your little ones. You're failing Me if you don't, and you're failing your children if you don't supply them with this very important side of love—correction and discipline. They need the security of knowing their boundaries‚ for a child left to his own devices will bring his parents shame.
109. So to you‚ My second-generation parents, and to parents of all ages, I say, "I expect it of you!" If I guide and instruct you in the way you should go, how much more should you do the same for your children, who know not the way on their own?
110. I ask you, where did this attitude of leniency and not giving children the discipline they need come from? It certainly didn't come from My Word, and it didn't come from David's teachings. You have allowed the Enemy to seduce you into believing more in the vain babblings and wisdom of the current clime of the world and man than in Me and My godly standards and teachings.
111. If you continue to cleave to the worldly standards and teachings on raising children and fail to give your children the discipline and training they need, then I promise you that your sorrow, troubles, and problems will be many. You will not see your children stand beside you as part of My Endtime army. You will have lost them to the world. Lost, because you failed to show them the way. Lost, because you failed to give them the loving discipline they needed.
112. How many of you will weep in latter years for what you failed to give your children in this way, all because the teachings of the world appealed to you more, because they cost you less, they required less of you as a parent. But, oh‚ the sad path it set the feet of your children upon. (End of message.)
113. (Mama:) These messages are very straightforward. I know you young people don't need me to spoon-feed this to you by pointing out the important warnings and explanations. The choice is up to you. You can choose to receive this Word, believe that it's of the Lord, and change, or you can choose to reject it and continue on as you are. This is a personal decision between you and the Lord.
114. But I do urge you to please study this and ponder what the Lord is saying. Really think about it. Look at your children and think about their future. What do you want for them? What kind of teenagers and young adults do you want them to become? What kind of future do you hope they'll have? Do your children respect you? Will they continue to respect you? When your children look at you, what do they see? Will you have to watch your children make their choices later in life without having a firm foundation in the Word, in yieldedness and the fear of the Lord? What is the moldable clay of your little children's character becoming‚ minute by minute? Will your children suffer because of your sins?
115. This is a question of your own obedience to the Lord and the Word. You, as Christians, will be held accountable by the Lord for the way you discipline your children, and you won't be able to blame anyone else. It's up to you.
116. This isn't about your parents, or some mean auntie or uncle of the past, or the problems with past Victor Camps, or anything else that has caused you to turn against the Word. This is about your personal obedience to the Lord and the Word. Later down the road, if your children are unhappy, discontent, and difficult to satisfy, if they don't respect you, if they always want things their own way, and they place themselves above the Lord's will and leading in their lives, then it won't be your parents' fault or some FGA's fault. You will be held accountable for your lacks, for your disobedience to the Lord.
117. While your children will eventually be held responsible for the decisions they make when they reach the age of adult accountability, you are responsible to prepare them for that time, to make it as easy as possible for them to give their lives to the Lord in full surrender by giving them the training and discipline they need and deserve‚ and by being the right sample to them of having the Lord first in your lives, putting on the Lord's mind‚ and being doers of the Word. While parents are not held responsible for the decisions their adult children make, that doesn't mean you have no responsibility to train your children up until that point. Of course you parents are responsible, and the Lord holds you responsible for your part of the child-training process. Then when your children reach adulthood, the full responsibility of the child's decisions passes to his or her shoulders. But until that time, the Lord holds you parents responsible.
118. The Lord says that the Enemy has spun a very subtle and gentle yarn of untruth and distortion. You might not even recognize such a web, or it might seem perfectly legitimate to you. But I beg you to call on the power of the keys and pray desperately that you can put on the Lord's mind on this matter by letting the Word establish your thoughts. Rebuke the evil spirit of Pan that might be influencing your thoughts and deceiving you. Do this even if you think you're right‚ even if you don't believe what the Lord said in these messages. Still, have the love and conviction to at least go to the Lord in desperation and openness‚ and let Him speak to you.
Copyright © 2005 by The Family International