Maria #392DO/TS 31334/97

1. (Mama hugs everyone as they come in:) This is just in case I don't get a chance to hug and kiss you afterwards! I'm glad you moved the chairs closer. Isn't this nice, being closer together than we were at the last meeting?

2. (Pointing to picture of Jesus leaning on the chair next to her:) See, even if Peter's gone‚ I always have one Husband left Who can stay with me all the time! That's why I've put this chair here with Jesus' picture on it, so you can visualize what's really happening in the spirit, and so I can be more conscious of it, too. Jesus told me He was going to be sitting beside me, so I thought it would be nice to have a chair for Him too! And having His picture here helps you guys to more easily visualize Him. He's sitting right here, and He's holding my hand.

3. How are you all? (Family: Fine!) I'm sure happy! This is fun‚ isn't it? I hope you don't mind having this meeting. You're not too tired or anything, are you? (Family: No!) Anyone else that I missed hugging? (One of the boys comes up for a second hug.) You get what you ask for, ha! Well, it's faith that wins the reward. "Give to him that asketh of thee!" Is everybody here? Nobody's sick or feeling bad? No headaches or backaches or anything? Praise the Lord!

4. How would you like to sing a few little songs? We don't need the guitars. We'll just sing a few little simple choruses on faith and believing. It seems like I sing the same songs on faith every time‚ don't I? So if you don't know'm by heart yet, you soon will! You may think I sound like a broken record, but I always need lots of faith, so I like to sing about it—and I figure you do, too!

5. (Prays:) We thank You, Lord, that we can have this sweet fellowship together. Thank You most of all that You're here. You're right beside us, and You love to be with us. You are always in our midst, and not just symbolically or theoretically, but You're really here! You're just as real and just as much here as any of us! It's just that we can't see You and feel You in the physical. But we certainly can see You with our spirits, and feel You in the spirit, and we know that You're here.

6. Bless this evening, Jesus. Make it a good evening‚ a happy evening‚ a fun evening—just exactly the way You want it to be. Help our faith to grow through all these things You're giving us. You're giving us more Word all the time so that our faith can grow by hearing Your Word. It's a daily continuing process so that our faith in You and what You're doing will grow.

7. Thank You, Lord‚ for Your wonderful promises! Thank You that we can always claim them, and that You're always ready to answer and deliver on them. Bless these songs now, in Jesus' name.

(Everyone sings the following choruses:)

* God Can Do Anything But Fail

* Let Go and Let God Have His Way

* Keep on Believing, Jesus Is Here

* Jesus Never Fails

* Only Believe

* Faith in God Can Move a Mighty Mountain

Singing Songs in Tongues—And Interpretation!

8. Those are beautiful songs‚ aren't they? Really beautiful. Sometimes I walk outside, either in the early morning or evening, taking my quiet time, and I want to express my feelings in song to the Lord. But it's difficult to remember enough songs on the subject that I want to sing about, and I sort of run out of songs. Either I can't remember enough on the subject, or sometimes it's just that there aren't any that really express exactly what I want to say to the Lord.

9. I get a little frustrated when I can't think of a song that exactly fits the feelings that I have. I know we have an awful lot of songs, and if I could remember them‚ they would probably be sufficient. Some of the songs I do remember are able to express my feelings pretty well, but sometimes I need something more. So the Lord said, "Sing to Me in tongues," and I started singing in tongues. I've done that before, just singing songs to the Lord in tongues. Do any of you do that? (Three people raise their hands.)

10. I kept thinking "Well‚ I know that the Lord knows what I'm saying, and that's the most important thing, but I wish I knew what I was saying as well!" I was happy because I knew that it was making Him happy, because He was hearing the love from my heart; but I wished I could get the words, too, to know what I was saying to Him. And guess what I found out when we prayed? He said that He could give the interpretation!—Although I think that's somewhere in the future for me.

11. But maybe we can have some fun tonight with me showing you how I sing in tongues, and you getting the interpretation for me! Do you want to try it? He said that singing in tongues is like making love to Him, so we can have a big lovemaking session right now! It's like getting naked before Him and yielding ourselves to Him—not thinking about our words‚ but just saying to Him whatever He wants us to say, we don't know what—until afterwards, when you are going to get the interpretation, God willing! This is the first time we'll be doing this, but I'm sure the Lord will make it really special.

12. Of you three who sing to the Lord in tongues, have you ever gotten an interpretation? (Family: No.) Well, there's always a first time! I remember one time hearing a group of Christians singing in tongues all together, each on their own, sort of a choral chanting to the Lord. You wouldn't have thought that it could be so beautiful, but it was. I wonder if I could demonstrate how they were doing it. (Mama sings in tongues in a chant–like tune.) Everybody was singing like that together. (Family: Did they all sing the same melody?) No, they all sang differently, however they wanted to sing, and it was really beautiful! I won't make you do it, though, don't worry! Ha! I think I told you in one of the Letters how Peter and I were singing in tongues together, but there wasn't much melody to it. It's not like an actual song.

13. But what I'm talking about doing here is singing actual melodies to the Lord—not known songs, but songs that the Lord gives us. The Lord said that when we do that, it's singing to Him a new creation, a totally new song that has never been sung before! Here's the message He gave us about it. (Listens to her dictaphone and repeats to all: )

14. (Jesus speaking:) Singing songs in tongues is for the edification of your spirit‚ and they can only be interpreted through the power of My Spirit. It is fresh‚ new inspiration with each song in tongues, for each time it is a new creation of My Spirit, and it is a song that you have never heard before. It whisks you away into the spiritual realm where your mind and your tongue and your thoughts are focused on Me and My Spirit. It can be very uplifting and inspiring.

15. When you sing in tongues unto Me, it is a yielding of your tongue and your mind and your heart to Me. It is lovemaking with Me in the spirit. For you know not what you are saying; you just yield and do it by faith. It is sweet lovemaking to Me as you open your mouth and lift up your voice to Me in the spirit and let those precious tongues roll from your mouth to Mine. It can be so beautiful and such a thrill to your spirit!

16. Of course I can give you the interpretation‚ My queen. I can tell you what the words are. I can tell you what the tongues mean. It's like receiving prophecy: You let your tongue speak and I give the message. It may take some practice and some getting used to and some learning, but I can give the interpretation and it will be so beautiful and so inspiring. It may not be for everyone, because it's a total yielding. It's like stripping naked before Me and letting Me fuck you in the spirit. Not everyone will feel the same height of inspiration or ecstasy, because much depends on their yieldedness. (End of message from Jesus)

17. (Mama:) Of course, every song sounds a little like some other song, you can't get away from that‚ but it's your song to the Lord that's just for Him alone. It's a real sweet part of our lovemaking to Jesus. It's not the only way that we make love to Him, but it's a special part of it. I'm going to show you how I do it, because I think when you have your own private devotions, you might like to sing like this too. Somebody overheard me singing in tongues the other night as I was walking back and forth. I hope I didn't disturb anyone. I've been singing to the Lord like this a lot lately.

18. At first I thought, "Is this doing me much good? Since I can't understand it‚ is this really a good use of my time? Does the Lord really like this?" That was when I had somebody pray about it, and the Lord said He really does like it, and for those who have enough faith‚ He can even give them the interpretation.

19. Anyway, I'm just going to sing now. It's a song, but it's in tongues, so you're not going to be able to understand it unless you get the interpretation. I'm going to stop after the song, and if somebody gets the interpretation you can give it, okay? (Somebody is laughing.) Are you getting it already? Ha! I suppose you could get it before I even sing it, because the Lord can do things like that! But I'll go ahead and sing it first, and then I'm going to stop, and you can give the interpretation, okay? I didn't hear any response‚ ha!

20. Sometimes I'm off key and sometimes I'm on key‚ but I just sing to the Lord! He says to make a joyful noise unto Him, whether it's off key or on key (Psa.98:4; 33:3).—Like the little boy who just said his ABC's and the Lord understood what he meant. (See Good Thots 2, page 1037‚ #15.)

21. I'm just going to do it because it's the humble thing to do, for one thing. I always have to keep in mind doing the humble thing! In some ways, just coming to talk to you is a humbling thing! But in addition, I tried to think of all the other things that would be the most humbling for me. I thought that maybe we could have a "Mama do the humble thing" night‚ when I can do all the things that would be the most humbling for me, just to make sure I stay humble! You probably don't think I have a lot of pride, but if you're real shy like I am, that's pride, pure and simple. I'm trying to get over it‚ so Lord, please help me.

22. It's nice to sort of make a fool of yourself if you want to stay humble! I don't know if singing in tongues, not knowing what I'm singing and doing it for the first time here, is gonna make a fool of me or not! Dad said, "Honey‚ people are really going to know you've changed! I remember when we were in meetings and I would try to get you to say something, and you didn't want to say a word, you were so shy." Well, the Lord's helping me, thank You Jesus! Besides, I had a couple of people pray for me that I wouldn't be proud tonight.

23. You can say almost anything to the Lord—anything that makes Him happy—whatever you do that is praising Him and loving Him and worshiping Him! You can quote Scriptures to Him‚ or sing songs to Him that you already know, or sing in tongues, or pray in tongues, or listen to the "Loving Jesus" tapes, or read the little booklet of love words to Jesus (To Jesus With Love), anything like that. The Lord's given us such a wonderful variety of materials, and also showed us so much about how we can make Him happy.

24. (Mama sings in tongues.) Does anybody have the interpretation?

(Family:)

I love You, my King of kings!

Your Spirit has flooded my soul!

Your sun and Your warmth

Have filled me with glory‚

More than has been told!

(Family:)

The heavens declare the glory of God,

And so does my soul!

25. This is so good! Let's keep doing this! (Mama sings another song in tongues.)

(Family:)

Your love for me is like a spring of

Water that never runs dry,

But is always flowing, flowing, flowing on me!

Your love for me is like the sunshine—

Always warm, always beaming‚ beaming, beaming on me!

Your love for me is everlasting and above all!

26. (Mama: ) We praise You, Lord! It's so beautiful! It's so sweet, Jesus. I can do this all night if you guys can! It's wonderful! Just think of these beautiful things the Lord can give! I suppose He could just give the interpretation without even singing the songs‚ if you ask Him. But since they're song words, it probably comes a lot easier if you actually sing the song. Isn't this wonderful? Isn't it exciting? These are such beautiful things! I want to keep getting these things from the Lord, so if nobody minds, I think I'll keep singing! At least I know the Lord likes it, and I hope you do, too! (Mama sings in tongues again.)

(Family:)

I lift up my arms to You,

My Lover‚ my Husband, my Friend.

I give You my kisses, my lips, my smile‚

I give You everything!

How can I hold back from You,

Who have given me Your all?

(Family:)

The heavens declare the glory of God,

And so does my soul!

(Mama sings again in tongues.)

(Family: )

My heart bursts forth with happiness;

My spirit is set free!

As You give me Your love,

I give my all to Thee.

You take my heart into Your hands,

I give to You my all.

My heart bursts with happiness,

I come gladly when I hear You call!

You fill my spirit with rejoicing,

I long for Your tender touch!

Of You, my Lover‚ my Savior, my Husband,

I can never get enough!

You enthrall me and fill me,

And I give myself wholly to Thee!

27. (Mama:) Thank You Jesus! We do! We give ourselves wholly to You! Thank You for these beautiful Words, Lord, that not only edify our spirits‚ but our minds and our hearts as well. Thank You so much, Lord. Let's do one more! I want to collect these so I can use'm in my quiet time. They're so good! Once I get started, it's hard for me to stop!

28. Many of you have gotten words of love and praise to the Lord in prophecy, but this is another step, to get the interpretation of actual songs in tongues! I think this is what the Lord is trying to get our musicians to do. He's basically telling them to do the same thing as we're doing here tonight, although because He's given them the gift of tunes for the Family, they're probably going to come out a lot differently than ours! Ha! But they can get'm just like this, singing in tongues and getting the interpretation. On the other hand, they might just open their mouths and the Lord might give them the interpretation simultaneously with the melody, bypassing the tongues.

29. That's what the Lord means by cascading the songs down! Look how many songs we just got! We probably can't use'm for anything except our own devotions, but at least it's a little token of what the Lord can do!—And it's really wonderful‚ isn't it? The Lord could certainly give the melody and the words at the same time. If you have the faith‚ you can just sing the tune the first time and get the words along with it!

30. (Family: Interpretation of tongues is one of the gifts of the Spirit‚ so maybe that's something we should pray for.) Yes, that's what we're doing in this case. Thank You Jesus! Give it to us, Lord. We thank You for the wonderful marvels of Your spirit world and how You're so ready to have us expand our horizons and vision. You want us to keep pushing forward and keep reaching out further and keep partaking of these wonderful things, because You love us and You want us to be able to revel in Your wonderful gifts and the wonderful things You have for us. (Sings again in tongues.)

(Family:)

I delight to do Thy will, My Husband, my Love!

I delight and thrill to Your touches of love—

To open my body, my heart,

And my mouth for You,

To receive and to give Your Words.

31. (Mama:) Yes, Lord, we delight in this! It's such a wonderful thing. We thank You, Jesus, so much. That's beautiful, Jesus! We do delight in this. We delight in You. You're our Delight, our Treasure, our wonderful Love Who delights in us and delights in pouring all these wonderful gifts and treasures down upon us!

32. Thank you for stepping out and getting those interpretations! Wasn't that beautiful? (Family: The singing really made a difference in being able to get the interpretation so easily. I felt moved when you were singing. Sometimes when I get prophecies, it's almost like I feel it welling up in my stomach and I feel like I've got to give it. Those are the kind when I really feel most inspired, so to speak. It's always the Lord, but sometimes you feel more compelled, or like you're really getting more moved in the spirit, and that's the way I felt when you were singing.)

33. There are dynamics in the spirit world, and when we're doing something like that—which is really, like the Lord said‚ making love to Him in the spirit—then I'm sure He blesses that. Like what He said about having prophecy in a group. He says that the drawing power, the vacuum of everybody getting together and pulling, is very great. There are some dynamics of His realm that kick into effect, apparently, and make some things stronger or easier if you follow a certain direction or do certain things.

34. (Family: I was thinking ahead of time, "I'll never get anything," and I was sort of hoping I wouldn't because I didn't want to say anything! Ha! But then as soon as you started singing, I just felt sort of gripped, like‚ "Yes, you need to say this!" And it was so beautiful, it really was like lovemaking.) (Family: It was neat you sang more than once. I started getting the interpretation the very first time. Then I thought, "Well, I'll just wait a few seconds and see if somebody else goes first." Then someone else went and I thought, "Oh, good, I don't have to do it, this cup is passed from me." But then when you said you'd do it again, I thought, "Okay, I'll do it this time!") (Several people mentioned later that they had gotten different interpretations to the songs than were actually given publicly, and they were wondering what the reason was for this. It was simply because the Lord was giving different verses to the song.)

Mama's Guessing Game!

35. Well, I've got something else very special to tell you tonight! Now, don't worry‚ it's nothing bad or that you need to be afraid about. Sometimes people's first response—when hearing that someone wants to tell them something—is fear, and they automatically think it's going to be bad news. It's our natural inclination to wonder, "Is it going to be something bad? Something difficult to take?" Well, don't forget, a lot of news is good! Isn't it sad that the Enemy gets in like that and makes us immediately have a negative reaction instead of a positive one? So, "Cheer up, ye saints of God, there's nothing to worry about; nothing to make you feel afraid, nothing to make you doubt!" This is good news, and you'll like it! And you don't have to do anything about it except just sit here and enjoy it!

36. I'm going to let you in on a little secret! It's about me‚ and I don't think it's going to make you feel bad in any way or make you have to do anything that's going to be hard for you. It doesn't directly affect you. But because you're all my loves, I want to let you in on it, and I want to tell you right away! Can anybody guess who doesn't have any idea? Well, you've got to have an idea if you're going to guess!—Ha!—But what I mean is, somebody who hasn't already heard about it somehow. Sometimes you guys hear little things that are floating around. I resolved that I wouldn't play a guessing game tonight‚ but I just love'm! I'm always doing it with people, I don't know why. I'm sorry. Maybe that's the teacher in me coming out. Or maybe it's Dad in me coming out!

37. Okay, who wants to guess? No, it's not that I'm pregnant or gonna have a baby. And no, I'm not going to go on a trip to meet up with Peter (who was visiting Japan and Thailand at the time). That would be good news for me if I was, but maybe not so good for you, and this is good news for all of us! Do I hear some whispers in the back row? Isn't anyone going to come up with anything? Is someone gonna try? (Family: Maybe you could give clues, or act out a charade.)

38. Well, it has something to do with humility. (Family: Are you gonna do a striptease for us?) I thought about that! When I was thinking about what would be the most humble things I could do, I thought of that. But that wouldn't be as bad as dancing after I did the striptease! Of course, I had the singing in tongues, I got through that one. And you guys got the interpretation, so we were in it together; I didn't have to do it all by myself. Any more guesses? (Family: Does it have to do with making love? Making love in front of everybody certainly would fall under the category of humility!) Ha, ha! Well, I hadn't thought of that, but yes, that would certainly be doing the humble thing! But that's not it. If that were it, then I wouldn't want to be partial, so since we're all adults present, you'd have to join in. We'd have to united love-up here, and that would affect you. Ha! I said it's not going to affect you directly and personally.

39. (Family: Does it have something to do with something for the Family? Are you going to make a tape or a video for the Family?) That was a good guess. Well, it is going to affect them, because anything that affects me affects the Family. So yes, it will affect everybody. It's not a tape or a video, though. (Family: Are you going to go on a vacation?) No, because that wouldn't be happy news for you. I mean, it would be in a way, but maybe you wouldn't be so happy about me going away. Come on now! You girls and boys are usually quite creative in thinking up things! (Family: It's like news, right?) You're always the news hound, ha! I'm sure you'll want to put this in the Grapevine!

40. (Family: Did you get a prophecy?) You must have prayed and asked the Lord to show you the answer! Yes, you're right on track! This is the news I want to tell you: The Lord is giving me the gift! And I underline "giving"! This guessing game paid off! Somebody finally guessed it! (All cheering and clapping!) (Family: It's funny, because while you were singing, I was thinking‚ "What's the difference between this and prophecy?" When you come out with new songs like that, it's like having the gift of prophecy!) Yes‚ it is. But I wasn't the one getting the interpretation. I considered trying, but since I've tried earlier without much success, I decided to let you be the ones to get the interpretation this time.

41. The Lord said that I could get it, but He indicated that it's probably going to take me some time and a lot of practice. He wasn't talking to you guys‚ because you've already practiced; He was talking to me. I've been practicing a little, but it's definitely practicing, and it doesn't seem to come out as well as it does with you. I could have tried tonight, but I thought I'd probably get stuck, and I really wanted to hear the beautiful full-fledged interpretations!

Baby Gifts and Adult Gifts!

42. The Lord said that my gift of prophecy is a baby gift!—But I've got it, thank You Jesus! I got over the hump‚ thank the Lord! But, see, He made that distinction that some people He gives baby gifts to, and sometimes they'll stay baby gifts for a long time, depending on a variety of things. He called mine a baby gift, in contrast to an adult gift. With other people He bypasses the baby stage and gives them an overnight adult gift that is more complete and refined. A lot of you have gotten it that way.

43. Others of you have gotten a baby gift, where you start out by giving verses or just little sentences of comfort or encouragement, maybe MO quotes, and then little by little you get more over a period of time. Who got their gifts like that? Some of you have. But more of you seem to have gotten an adult gift, with the Lord giving you a more complete, full gift of prophecy pretty much overnight‚ or within a very short period.

44. But the Lord said He was giving me my gift as a baby gift. I think one of the reasons is that He wants to keep me humble. He told me He was giving it to me this way so that I can be more of an encouragement to the Family in taking the little steps, going step by step, because that's the way a lot of them are going.

45. You can get pretty discouraged when you hear other people all of a sudden getting a fully developed gift, and you're still getting little verses! Not that there's anything wrong with getting verses, but you do compare; it's just a fact of life. You compare your verses or little phrases or a few little sentences to their long, flowing prophecies, and it causes a lot of people to just give up! For one thing, they read all these beautiful full prophecies in the GNs, and they think, "My goodness, I'm never gonna get a gift like that!" Or they hear one or two very seasoned prophets in their Home, or even people who just got the gift but have a very beautiful, well–developed gift, and they think, "Oh‚ something must be wrong with me. What's the use of trying?"

46. The Lord said that the way He's given this to me will be an encouragement to others. I told the Lord that maybe I should wait until I was more practiced and it was more flowing and complete and full. It would be much nicer to tell everybody then, and it wouldn't be near as humbling. But the Lord said that it was going to be more of an encouragement to everybody now, when I'm experiencing taking the same little steps as many of them are. This way they'll be able to learn right along with me and they can feel that they have some hope. If I'm starting out really small, maybe they can do the same; and if I'm going to keep going and practicing my gift, then they should do the same.

47. I'm going to be sharing with you the whole story of how the Lord gave me this gift in a GN that's already written, and I think you'll find it very interesting. The Lord gave me quite a bit of encouragement when I was down in the depths of despair and wondering, "Why should I try? I have all these wonderfully developed, seasoned channels, so why do I have to do it?" So I explained a little bit about it and put it all together in a GN, and this is what we want to read to you! We probably won't have time to read it tonight, but maybe you could read it tomorrow, partly at devotions and then some in the evening‚ and then finish it up the next day at devotions. Would you mind doing that? (Family: No!)

48. The Lord told me to practice, and I've been practicing every day! Sometimes I get something and sometimes I don't. Most of the time I do, but usually they're very short. Sometimes I'm encouraged and sometimes I'm discouraged. Sometimes I'm up and sometimes I'm down. Sometimes I wonder the classic question, "Are these really Your Words of prophecy, Lord, or is this my own mind thinking these thoughts? Or not exactly my own thoughts, but my mind thinking Your thoughts and not getting Your direct Words in prophecy?" I've heard this same story lots of times from lots of you; it's very familiar! (Everyone laughs.) That's probably the one I hear the most! It's natural.

49. Isn't it nice that I now have the same battles as so many of you? (Family: Yes!) And the Lord keeps encouraging me that, "No, they're not your own thoughts, or even My thoughts, but they're My Words." But then some of them don't say very much, just a sentence or two, and I wonder, "Is this a prophecy?" And there's the big comparison battle, comparing with you. You have such beautiful gifts, and here I am just starting out. Oh dear! Anyway, I shouldn't be thinking that. I should be thinking, "Wow, this is tremendous! I finally got it! This is something to really celebrate and thank the Lord for!"

50. The Lord said to celebrate! He said "You don't have to go down there thinking, 'This is a big burden.'" And even though I do get a little discouraged sometimes, it's still really good news and it's wonderful‚ and it's a precious, precious gift from Jesus. If it came easily and I didn't have to really work at it—work at it in the way of practicing and taking the time to get desperate with the Lord—then I wouldn't have all these questions, and I wouldn't be asking them, and I wouldn't be getting answers‚ both for myself and the entire Family! You see? So that's another reason for it happening like this.

51. It seems like the Lord's always allowed things to be a little difficult for me at first. Remember how I used to tell you it was so hard for me to dictate letters? Well‚ the Lord's done a real miracle, and now when I finally get down to doing it, the Lord really helps me! One of the secretaries said, "Mama, these letters are almost one-take!" It was so difficult for me before, and I had to make so many changes and edits on things‚ but now it just really flows! It's wonderful!

52. I need to give the Lord more glory and I need to tell the Family about that! I told them how hard it was for so long, but now I need to testify of the miracles the Lord has done, and how it's not so hard any more to dictate GNs and letters and things like that. It's very hard getting started, but once I get started, the Lord helps me and does it!

53. I usually have to work at things for a while and hold on by faith‚ and I have to really fight. I usually think I'm not much of a fighter, but when I look back on some things, then I see that I really did have to fight. Anything in life that's difficult, if you keep persevering, the Lord does eventually bring you through and make it easier for you. If you keep holding on and keep fighting and just keep trusting Him, it's going to be easier. Like Dad says, the Devil will give up if you don't give in, because he sees that he can't win!

54. So it's been a little difficult receiving this wonderful gift. But anything that's worth this much, you can understand why it might be a battle getting it! Sometimes I'm elated; sometimes I'm discouraged. But that's good, and that keeps me going to the Lord and asking for further clarifications. I expect it's going to be a fight for a while, but at least I'm over the hump because I've actually started. Like the saying goes, "Well begun is half done!"

55. I hope you're happy to hear this news, and that you'll pray for me! The last couple of days I've had sort of a slump and I haven't been getting much‚ but like the Lord said another time when He was encouraging me, "If it come, it come; if it don't come, it don't come! So why worry about it?"

The Lord Said to Celebrate!

56. So guess what we're going to do tonight? (Family: Celebrate!) Celebrate, that's right. Before the meeting, I asked someone to hear from the Lord for me. I said, "Lord, can You just say something to me in prophecy? Anything! I don't care, just something!" And here's what He said:

57. (Jesus speaking: ) Working backstage behind the scenes is so comfortable, behind the stage pulling the cords, alone in your darkness. How well you know how things work, which cord to pull for what curtain, the routine of how things work, and the comfort of the darkness, unseen and out of sight and secure.

58. I understand the dread, the nervousness to step out on the stage, to walk through the curtains as they open, to be in the lights, to be the focus, to be alone on stage, to perform. I understand the fear of the first time‚ the butterflies, the uncertainty, the emptiness in the stomach, the self-consciousness, the uncomfortableness. But this will be only momentary and it will pass‚ for I will help you.

59. As you proceed, the anointing will come, the crown will descend, the words will come, and the fear will flee. Do not be afraid, for I am your Husband, and you are not alone. We are together on stage, side by side. You are not alone. I have My arm around you. I am right there beside you every moment and will hold you the whole time. I will be encouraging you‚ speaking to you, squeezing your hand‚ smiling at you, kissing you, helping you every moment. I will comfort you and give you all the words you will need. You'll be surprised! And then afterwards we will celebrate! You'll be so happy! And then we'll go have a nice love-up as your reward and I'll make love to you real big, My sweet and wonderful wife!

60. I'm so proud of you! I adore you! You make Me so happy! This is a very important occasion for Me, as well as for you. It makes Me so happy to be able to work so closely together in this way with you‚ hand in hand as Husband and wife in such unity and harmony and oneness. This has been My dream. Thank you for saying yes and being so yielded. I will help you and make it easy. You have no idea how much joy this brings Me. I love you, My sweet and precious darling. (End of message from Jesus.)

61. (Mama:) I thought that was really sweet! I've got to hurry up and get through with this so I can have my date with Jesus! Of course, it's not that I don't like to be with you; I really do!

62. I was asking you what we're going to do tonight, and you said celebrate! And we are celebrating, that's true. But specifically, how are we going to celebrate? Any ideas? (Family: Praise and thank the Lord?) Yes, we're going to do that. (Family: Sing?) We did sing. I'd like to sing more, but we probably have other things to do. (Family: Say love words to Jesus?) Well, yes, maybe. I think we did, though. Those song words said such beautiful things, I just loved them! (Family: We could all have a date with Jesus, too?) Well, we could do that, but that's not what I had in mind. (Family: Dance?) I didn't have that in mind either. I guess all those are things we could do, but since I talked for so long, I don't think we will. (Family: Listen to some prophecies?) (Family: That you got?) Well, I was still back on the "listen to some prophecies" and was trying to think what I was going to say in answer to that, ha!

63. Yes, we're going to listen to a prophecy‚ Lord willing; and yes, Lord willing, that I got! When I asked the Lord about coming down here to have this meeting with you and read the GN, He said that I only needed to attend the first part of the meeting. He said that, yes, it would be nice to fellowship with you, and then I should leave and the Letter could be read to you. Because of my eyes, I couldn't read the Letter to you, and someone else would have to.

64. And while I was thinking about meeting with you, it started coming to me that maybe the Lord was going to want me to give a public prophecy. After all, I ask you guys to get prophecies all the time, don't I? (Family: Yes.) And you poor guys‚ sometimes you haven't gotten anything and you've sat there for a long time trying to get something—not in a public meeting but on your own. And then you come back and say, "Mama, I didn't get anything." And what do I say? (Family: Go back and try again!) Ha! Well, you always do finally get something, don't you? So that can either be discouraging or encouraging for me, I'm not sure which right now!

65. But I thought, "Well, Lord, I really don't think I should ask everybody to do things that I'm not willing to do. Getting those prophecies sometimes puts them through pretty big trials, and I should be willing to do the same thing myself." Some of you poor guys have had some pretty big trials, especially giving your first prophecies in a public meeting. Your hearts are pounding and you're almost ready to run out of the room! You can hardly get the words out and your hands are clammy and you're sweating and your stomach's churning and in knots and you're feeling nauseous. Well, maybe it hasn't been that bad, but some of you have had some pretty big trials! So I thought‚ "What I put these poor people through! I shouldn't be asking them to do all these things that I'm not willing to do."

66. It's a matter of faith. You never know what's there or what's going to come. Of course, I could say, "Well, you all have better-developed gifts than I do." But you probably had some greater pressure, too! You had me asking you to get something! So whether it was in private or in public, it was difficult for you.

67. So I thought, "Lord, I don't know about this‚ but I have a sneaking suspicion that this is maybe what You want me to do! And this isn't my favorite thing to do either, Lord. I'm not even doing too well at getting it in private, so how am I going to get it in public?"

68. I told Peter on the phone the other day about what the Lord has done in giving me this gift of prophecy, and he said, "Oh, when I get back we can do it together!" I said "Oooooh! That would be sooo humbling!" I was thinking of that today, and I thought, "Oh, no! If I felt that bad about doing it with Peter, how can I come down and do it in public in front of everybody?" Sometimes I don't even have the faith to get something when I ask—or at least I don't know if it's really a prophecy, and I don't know what's going to happen.

69. Well, I of course asked the Lord about it—through one of you more seasoned channels. I figured if I got the Word on it‚ then I wouldn't weasel out of it; whereas there is a good possibility that I would if I didn't! See, I use prophecy to force myself to do things a lot of times. When I'm reluctant to do something‚ I ask the Lord, and I know that if He tells me to do it‚ then I'll do it, there's no question. Otherwise I can wiggle out of things by thinking, "Oh, I don't really know. Those are just my thoughts‚" so I can get out of it. That's one reason why I always ask the Lord about things, especially when it has to do with something that I think I might be needing to do. Because I know that if the Lord says it, then I have to do it. That settles it! It's a nice persuader.

70. So, guess what? I asked the Lord if I should give a public prophecy, and guess what He said? (Family: You could get one in private and read it?) (Family: That it was your choice?) Yes, both of those things! He gave me the option of asking for a message beforehand that I could read to you. That was really sweet of Him, wasn't it? However, I want to do the things that I ask you to do, and since you usually don't get to get your prophecies beforehand and come and read them, I thought that I shouldn't either! It's okay sometimes, and I let one of the girls do it the other day, and that gave her the faith to give one on the spot—her first public prophecy! But in my case tonight, I felt that I should set the sample.

71. You guys have done so well! I really admire you! I admired you a lot before, but I admire you even more now! (Everybody laughing!) I know what you must go through, because I know what it's like to sit up here or do anything publicly. I've always been so shy, so I don't have to give prophecy to understand how difficult it is! For me, giving these meetings is almost as difficult as giving a prophecy.

72. Okay, now back to asking the Lord if I needed to get a prophecy here in front of all of you! The first thing He said was, "I'm not going to require it of you." Did I breathe a sigh of relief? Of course not! The Lord knows how to give me a resounding "yes" without saying it directly. All He has to do is tell me it's not a requirement! Because when He says that‚ He's saying that even though He's not insisting on it or demanding it, He would like it. At least that's the way it always seems to me. And if that wasn't clear enough, He went on to say, "Even though I'm not requiring this of you, I think you'll want to do it, My love!" That sure was clear enough, wasn't it? Ha! Here's what He said:

73. (Jesus speaking:) You have taken so many big steps of faith, My love, and I do not ask that you perform in public and receive My voice of prophecy unless you would also like to take that step of faith.

74. It is enough that you share the good news with them and deliver the message publicly through the reading of the GN. That is the purpose of the meeting—to share with your precious Family members that I have blessed you with My gift of prophecy, and that you are practicing and learning step by step. So I do not require or feel that you must make a public manifestation of My gift of prophecy unless you desire to do so.

75. If you prefer, you could read or have someone else read a message which I have given you ahead of time. I can give you a message ahead of time which you can then read and deliver in a public meeting. I want to make it as easy as I can for you, My love, and that is why I am telling you that it is not a requirement that you receive a prophecy at your first meeting with the Family.

76. But I have a feeling that you will want to receive a message from Me publicly to encourage people's faith and to set an example for others. And if you do choose to do so, My love, I will be right there and I will make it easy. I will make it flow more quickly and more easily. I will not let you down and I will not fail you‚ but I will quicken the words to your ears and your heart that you may hear them clearly and deliver them more easily. I will shine through you, My queen‚ in front of the people, that they may see it is a miracle of My hand and it is truly a gift of prophecy.

77. If you choose to do so, I will deliver a message that will glorify Me and My anointing upon you. So fear not, My darling, for if you choose to prophesy in front of the people, My anointing will fall upon you and the message will be delivered and you will not fail. They will see and feel My Spirit and they will know that it is I Who spoke to them. (End of message from Jesus.)

78. So the Lord said, "I think you'll want to do this, My love." So I said, "Lord, yes, of course I want to do it‚ if You want me to! Might as well be real positive about it! I do want to do it, Lord. I'll just do it! It doesn't even matter if You want me to just sit here and get nothing, like some people have, because that'll be humbling for me, and that'll be good for me—very good for me! Or even if You want to just give me a sentence or two, I'll be happy."

79. The Lord said He would help me and He would fulfill His promises, but we can't second-guess the Lord and know exactly how He's going to fulfill them. The Lord indicated that I could wait until I had a little more faith to give a public prophecy, when it would be easier. But I thought, why am I trying to make it easier for myself, when, again‚ I need to show you guys that I'm willing to do what I've asked you to do. So I don't really want to take the easy way out.

80. I just want you to know right now that the Lord has done a very big miracle—and I'm not just talking about the big miracle of giving me this gift of prophecy. That certainly is a big miracle, but a miracle equally as big is the fact that right now I don't have any nervousness! I don't have any knots in my stomach. I'm not worried about anything, so I don't want you to be worried either. This is going to be a demo‚ and we're just going to see what happens. I already did my praying beforehand and I got my go-ahead and my promises, and we're just going to have a little demo—like when Peter came down with his computer that time!

81. For the sake of those of you who weren't here at the time, he came down to show everybody his "dictater." He has a dictation program that has a little microphone, and you dictate to it and it types your letter on the computer for you. He wanted to show everybody what it would do. Somebody tell them what happened. (Family: It wasn't very obedient!) (Family: Every time he said "Lord‚" it came out as "boy." Or he'd try to say, "I love you," and it would say "HCS JETTs"—the weirdest words you could possibly imagine. Not even close!) And he tried and tried, didn't he? He came back to the room and said, "Oh, it was a disaster." (Family: It was so much fun!) He said "It was just what I needed. I really needed that to keep me humble."

82. So I thought about that, and I thought if Peter could come down here and give a demonstration and have it turn out like that, and he praises the Lord for it and says, "Well, it just kept me humble," then I could come and give a demonstration too! I don't think it's going to turn out quite so garbled, though—if anything comes out! (Everyone laughing!) So I'm going to do like everybody else has to do and face my fears. But I shouldn't have any, because when you know the Lord wants you to do something and He's promised to help you—however it is He's going to help you—you shouldn't worry about it!

83. When you're on the spot, He says to turn around and put Him on the spot! So‚ Jesus, whatever You want, I'll be happy with it. (Family: You're such a good sample.) Well, you guys have been a very good sample to me‚ and I've seen your sample for months and months. So I figure if you can do it, I should be able to. We all really have an effect on each other, and we encourage each other; and you certainly encourage me in so many ways. Anyway, that's what we're going to do in a minute. I'm making such a big deal of it! We could have gotten the whole prophecy session over if we'd had you all doing the prophesying! It could have already been done!

84. But I'd like to give you a little break first so you can get up and stretch and mill around. Maybe you think I'm the one that needs it, not you! (All laughing!) Maybe you're not feeling tired or bored or like going to sleep, but why don't you just get up and stretch and walk around for a few minutes. Okay? How long have we been here? (Family: An hour and 15 minutes.) Okay, let's have a little break, because if you're tired at all, it'll help you. I love you all! Isn't this fun? (Family: Yes!) (Everyone takes a stretch break.)

Mama's Demo!

85. (After everyone is back from the break:) What a miracle that I'm not even nervous! Before the meeting I really prayed, and I asked a couple of people to pray for me. I happened to be talking to one of the girls, and I said, "Can you hear from the Lord for me about the meeting tonight?" Were you surprised? You didn't really realize what you were praying for! I asked her if she could get something for me. She was going to go on her get-out, but she said, "Oh, I'd be happy to." I said, "I don't want to take your get-out time, but if you can do it in about 10 minutes, really quick‚ then go ahead and do it." I said, "Pray for my humility and against my pride, and that I'll be relaxed and won't be nervous"—and the Lord's really done it!

86. The Lord is gradually helping me to be more relaxed in my meetings, and especially now when I'm going to do a public performance! It's the Lord that's got to do it, right? If you have the gift of prophecy and you wait and He doesn't give you anything‚ well, He doesn't give you anything! Or maybe He doesn't want to give you anything at a certain time. Usually He gives something, but sometimes He doesn't. But whatever happens, we don't have to be nervous about it. Just like me getting up here and giving these meetings—it's got to be the Lord. The Lord has to give the message through me every time I do it. It's a little like prophecy, but because I'm now more comfortable with it and I've done it so long‚ it's easier. I still pray desperately beforehand! And maybe after a while, giving direct prophecy will be just as easy too. I pray it will be.

87. Did you all get a little stretch and a break? Is everybody here now? Okay, well, don't be nervous! (Everyone laughing.) You'll be more nervous than I am, what do you want to bet? You'll be praying, "Oh‚ Lord, help Mama to get it!" Well, if it come‚ it come; if it don't, it don't! I've had practice with that in the last few days. Sometimes it comes‚ sometimes it doesn't.

88. So normally when you're ready to get a prophecy, what do you do first? (Family: Pray.) (Family: Praise the Lord.) (Family: Speak in tongues.) (Family: Sing a song.) We've done all those things. I've been doing it all day, ha! What else? (Family: Review what your question is.) I don't know what the question is. I don't have any question. I don't even know what I'm supposed to be doing or saying! (Family: Ask the Lord to clear our minds.) (Family: And keep us from distractions.) (Family: Give us concentration.) (Family: Good clear channels.) (Family: Faith.) Okay, let's go around, and somebody pray for each one of those things you just mentioned, or anything else you can think of. Whoever said it can just pray it in a one-sentence prayer.

89. (Family: Do clear Mama's mind, Lord, and give her a strong, clear channel.) (Family: We pray against any distractions, any disturbances in the spirit world, or any here in this world; against any noises that would distract her.) (Family: Give her faith to create a vacuum and to give what You pour down.) (Family: We pray for the recorder to record properly without any complications.) (Family: Give her a strong connection with You.) (Family: We pray the message would be just what You want. Give Mama real faith and a trusting spirit to reach out and receive it. We pray against any of her own thoughts coming in, that she'll have good concentration and reach up and receive Your precious seeds.)

90. Amen, please do it, Jesus! I pray against pride‚ Lord, because nobody else wanted to say that for me. I ask You to help me not to be concerned about anybody or what they're thinking, or what else is going on, but to keep my mind stayed on You. I've already prayed this‚ but help me be right in every area of my life—right with You and pressing forward and being on the attack and doing what You want me to do and being cleared of any distractions of things that wouldn't be what You want them to be. Help me and give me a pure heart toward You.

91. Thank You, Jesus, for being my wonderful Husband, my wonderful Love, the One that I adore! I love You so much, I can't tell You how much, Lord! Words fail me to express how much You mean to me! You mean everything to me! I thank You for the wonderful gift of Your love most of all‚ just for loving me and giving me the things that You have; for taking me and picking me up in Your arms, just a little beggar girl, and making me a queen. Thank You for taking me into Your arms and into Your bed and giving me all the love that You could shower upon me. Thank You Jesus!

92. I love Your loving! I love Your caresses and kisses! I receive You, Your Words and Your seeds. I love them, Jesus. I love You to explode in me! I love it! It's wonderful‚ and I thank You for it. It's so exciting! It's the most marvelous thing to merge with You, to become one with You like that, and to feel Your love. I need You and I want You, my Darling. Give me Your Words now, whatever You have to say, whatever You want, Jesus. I'm just open to You‚ receptive and yielded to You, to do whatever You want to with me, and say whatever You want to say through me. (Tongues.) If somebody gets the first words, or a phrase, please go ahead and give it.

93. (Family, Jesus speaking:) Listen, My children, and you shall hear the pure, sweet Words of love from your Husband, your Lover, your King and Savior.

94. (Mama continuing with Jesus speaking: ) For I give them unto you out of My love for you—My precious honey Words from My lips‚ that will fill you and thrill you and cause you to sing and dance and love with Me and with each other. I delight in you‚ My children. I treasure your looks of love, your words of love, your expressions of love to Me. I'm excited by your excitement! I'm moved by your movement toward Me.

95. I love you with an everlasting love that knows no bounds, knows no limits! You are Mine and I will do anything for you. I will give and give and give whatever you wish‚ whatever you ask, because you please Me so greatly; you love Me so fervently; you hug Me in the spirit so ardently; you want Me so desperately!

96. I need you. I want you. You belong to Me! I need you as much as you need Me, and I am here for you. If you could only see how much I am here! If you could only feel how much I am with you, and realize how it delights Me to sit beside you, to walk beside you, to lie beside you in the bed of love!

97. I want to become more and more real to you as the days go by. I want you to know Me in a way that you have not yet known Me. There is more, My children! There is much more to experience. You are just starting out. You are just tasting of My love in small measure. So continue to reach out! Continue to go forward! Do not let your fears and your concerns hold you back.

98. I want to give you the freedom that you long for. I will give it to you if you will just cry out to Me‚ if you will just come close to Me, stay close to Me, and love Me as your One and Only. There are marvelous things to experience, that your mind cannot fathom as yet‚ that you cannot conceive of! But I will reveal them to you by My Spirit as time goes by. (End of message from Jesus.)

99. (Mama and all praise the Lord!) Praise the Lord! Well‚ the Lord did it! (Everyone clapping and cheering.) (Family: That's quite some baby gift!) (Family: If that's a baby gift, what do I have?) It is a baby gift. I was thinking about babies, and when you have a baby‚ you don't say, "Oh, it's just a baby, it's not grown up yet." We don't belittle the baby because it's a baby, but we're patient and we say, "It's a wonderful baby!" In some ways we don't even want it to grow up; we don't want the responsibility. (Family: That's a pretty big baby!) (Family: It's at least a 10–pounder!) (Family: I think you had twins!) Well, let me tell you, that was a special anointing—the miracle He promised He'd do if I would step out by faith and ask for His Words. My other ones haven't exactly been like this!

100. I needed a starter to prime the pump, and it came to me that I should ask somebody else to get the first phrase or sentence. (Three other people say they were getting a similar starting phrase.) Wow, thank You Jesus! Well‚ we shouldn't be surprised. It's quite fascinating!

101. That was beautiful! I think I cut it short, but it was a demo, after all! (Family: There were some neat things in there.) (Family: That was pretty heavy.) (Family: We have lots to anticipate in the future.) Even the singing in tongues and interpretation is another thing the Lord's showing us that's so beautiful.

102. (Family: Can I ask a question? How do you do that with the tongues? Is it a known melody and you just sing in tongues to that melody?) No, the Lord gives you a different melody than you've ever heard before. However, if you're just getting started and it's easier to do it to songs you already know, you can do that. But they're not songs that I know. It's just that the Lord is making it up as I go.

103. Some time back, whenever I would sing in tongues‚ the melodies sounded Hawaiian, and that's what I sang for the longest time. I thought it was just me and that I was making it up. I kept thinking‚ "Lord, I want to break out of this. It must be just me and I'm stuck in a rut." But now when I try to sing the Hawaiian tunes‚ I can't even think of them! I can't even think how I did it before or how I sang it at all. I can't get anything that sounds even faintly Hawaiian! When I get tired of one style, I just ask the Lord for another one, sort of like starting out by faith, but in a different kind of style, from slow to fast. It's really fun. Any other questions?

104. (Family: I have a question about your tongues. I hope it's okay to ask this.) You can ask it. You might have to end up asking the Lord, though!—And I'm not going to get the prophecy‚ ha! Well, I won't be definite about that, but I don't think so. (Family: When Dad spoke in tongues‚ the Lord showed him that it was some old Romany language. The tongues that you speak in are very distinct, and I just wondered if Dad ever said anything to you about where he thought they were from? To me it sounded sort of Hebrew or Arabic. I just wondered if Dad had ever said anything about it.)

105. I don't think so, but I think my tongues are changing. I don't think they're exactly the same as they used to be. They're different now‚ to some extent at least. (Family: A new anointing!) (Family: It says in the Bible you can have "tongues of men and of angels," so it might not even be a tongue that's on the Earth!) I guess that's one we'll have to ask the Lord about and see if He wants to tell us.

106. (Family: Thank you for coming and sharing all that!) (Family: This was a night to remember—a landmark.) (Family: It took lots of faith to do the humble thing.) I'm so proud, it's a miracle that I can be humble. It really is a big miracle that I didn't get nervous; I didn't have any butterflies or anything! That's a real milestone. (Family: Peter's gonna be so proud of you.) He said, "I'm gonna call you tomorrow to see what happened." (Family: You can say, "I'm just getting ready for when you come home.")

107. Okay, what time is it now? (Family: 10:15.) That's sort of late. Would you rather break up now and read the first part of the Letter tomorrow at devotions when you'll be more alert? (Family: Yes.) Okay, happy reading! Then if you don't mind reading some tomorrow night too, and then maybe the next day you can finish it up. Then, if it's all right with everybody‚ you can break up at the end and hear from the Lord. You can just do it privately or in two's, however you want to do it. Don't worry, no public prayer and prophecy this time—you can do it in private. We don't like to get stuck in ruts!—Plus‚ it will take a lot less time if you do it privately.

108. See, we don't always have to have public prophecy sessions. It's nice, and there are advantages, for sure‚ and the Lord always blesses unity and everybody pulling together in the spirit. But even when you do it in private, you'll all be doing it around the same time, and I think the Lord will bless it. That way it'll take less time, and you won't have to be put on the spot, except in your room.

109. So if that's all right, I really would appreciate it if you'd ask the Lord what He wants to say for the Family, and for me too. I still need encouragement! But I don't need that much encouragement right now, because the Lord has already given me so much. So you can get something for the Family, for all the people like me who are just starting out‚ or maybe haven't even started yet. In these types of meetings the Lord just gives what He wants to give; we don't usually ask specific questions. But if you have specific questions that pertain to the subject, you could ask those, since you'll be doing it privately. Would somebody like to close in prayer?

110. (Family: Lord, we thank You so much for Mama's faith, her obedience‚ and her yieldedness to You, Jesus, in doing what You've asked her to do. She's such a good sample for all of us, and for the whole Family. We thank You for answering prayer, that she wasn't nervous and didn't have butterflies. And we thank You, Jesus, for the beautiful Words You gave through her—such a beautiful message of love. We thank You for how You spoil us with such an abundant amount of love and Words and treasures.

111. (Please help everyone to have good dreams and sweet sleep tonight. We pray that as we read the GN together, we'll be fed by it and it can be a real encouragement. Thank You for Mama's sample. We also pray for Peter and the team that is away. Give them strength and give Peter the anointing he needs for these meetings he's holding. Keep their health; help them not to get sick in any way. Continue to keep Peter's heart strong and healthy. Thank You for this time of fellowship‚ to be together and love You and praise You. Thank You for Your love for us and how You manifest it in so many ways. In Your Name we pray, amen.)

112. (Mama: ) Thank You, Jesus, for being here. Thank You for sitting beside me and holding my hand. He said He'd hold my hand! That was a lot of fun! The Lord said He'd make it enjoyable. He said, "Believe it or not, it'll be enjoyable!" He knows me, it's a little hard for me to believe things sometimes, so He said‚ "Believe it or not!" (Family: That's a fulfilled prophecy!) (Mama gets up and kisses Jesus' picture.)

Copyright (c) 1998 by The Family