Open Letter from Bithia Sherman
January 1, 1994
"And all things are of God, Who hath reconciled us to Himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation" (2Co.5:18).
Dear Friends,
I would like to share with you the story of how the Lord completely changed my life. Many of you know me and those of you who do not have most likely heard of me. My name is Bithia and I have been an activist against the Family for the past several years. I was quite involved with exposing the Family through the media, through legal means and with many officials working towards persecuting the Family.
I was personally responsible for giving counsel to those who went to Japan and Argentina to persecute the Family in those countries. I provided testimony to the French police which resulted in the raids on the Family homes in France as well as the imprisonment of Family members. I provided counsel and direction on how to best distribute the stolen video tapes in order to cause the most damage. I instigated local officials to investigate the local home in my area. I worked with Cult Awareness Network (CAN) officials, social workers, sociologists and psychologists in their research and papers written against the Family. I frequently worked with the media, including newspaper and TV, willingly supplying inflammatory stories and details of my personal life and that of my children, in hopes of incriminating the Family. As you can see, I was quite involved in my endeavors to discredit, defame and ultimately destroy the Family.
I felt these endeavors were justified and righteous in God's eyes and I used my pain and bitterness as a platform to formulate my crusade. By my words and actions I had hoped to deliver the "innocent" from the clutches of the group.
Through the many events that have occurred this past year, none would have a significant enough impact to alter my behavior and actions. My children repeatedly begged me to stop. I witnessed the media exploiting myself as well as other ex-members. I became aware of how my own actions cast loved ones into prison.
None of these events were enough to stop my crusade. For a lack of words to explain my change, it was as though I experienced a supernatural awakening and I came to the realization that my endeavors were counter-productive. I discerned that my campaign to save the children and those that I supposed were being abused in the group was, in fact, actually hurting the very children I had hoped to help.
With a heavy heart I approached the Family and asked if they would like to negotiate a truce. The historic day arrived. We had agreed to meet in a neutral arena. Apprehensions and uncertainties were felt amongst all involved. Each was suspecting the other to have recorded the conversation. Regardless of being apprehensive, uncertain and suspicious, there was a deeper desire for a change to occur and for truth to prevail. How to accomplish that was yet to be determined.
It would be hard to describe all that transpired during that first 4 hour meeting. I found the Family members that I met to be warm, understanding, compassionate and receptive. I was expecting to be condemned and rejected for all the damage and suffering I had caused the group. To the contrary, they were very open and forgiving which made me further re-evaluate my former actions.
This meeting was the first of many meetings and visits to the Family communities. They invited me to see their homes and meet the children and young people. I was given free access to speak with anyone that I wished. I was completely amazed at their openness and willingness to answer my questions. I asked deep thought-provoking questions; to my surprise I received straight-forward honest answers.
I was expecting the typical "How to answer the Media" response to my questions. What I received were fresh unprepared answers that spoke to my heart and helped to resolve some of my many painful past Family experiences. I also discovered that the Family of 1993 is far different than the Family I left in 1984. It was a healthy change that I was unprepared for. I found the Family members that I met to be sincere, willing to humbly acknowledge their mistakes, and open to my suggestions. I also found that there truly is no child abuse or FFing going on in the Family, and things are quite different from what I imagined them to be. I have discovered the Teens to be refreshingly free thinkers, having the freedom to make decisions regarding their lives.
For my part, I felt that the Family needed to understand the pain and loss that many former members and relatives experience being separated from their loved ones. They were very open to my views and we began to work together to bring about a very important change that they acknowledged was needed. From there they asked me for my counsel and help in reuniting broken families and repairing estranged relationships. It is wonderful to see broken hearts and families mended. It is rewarding to see the walls torn down. Now I have found a much better way to facilitate changes. It has been a rewarding pursuit to transform "media to mediation", to turn my destructive angry sword into a plowshare that now brings healing and reconciliation.
I would like to invite you to share in my experiences and work together towards a restoration of wounded lives and spirits. It is an open door to any that possess the desire to walk through and the benefits are wondrous to behold. For too long the walls of bitterness and misunderstanding have separated us from loved ones. I can only encourage you that what I have experienced is genuine and producing wonderful results, contrary to that of my former actions. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions or I can possibly be of assistance.
Love and prayers,
Bithia
Copyright (c) 1998 by The Family