THE BENEFITS OF A HANDICAP!      10/92
--Handle with Care!      DO 2832

         1. Praise the Lord! Thank You Jesus! Hallelujah! I've told you before of many of my sicknesses and injuries, such as the hole in my head due to an auto accident when I was nine; and before that, when I was only five, the gas explosion which blinded me, and would have made me permanently blind had it not been for prayer. And I had many other injuries which were serious and could have left me permanently disabled if it had not been for the Lord. The Devil was trying to get me from my earliest years through to some of my latest, but I have survived them all, thank the Lord, and thanks to your prayers, and only a few have left me permanently semi-disabled.
         2. My sense of hearing has been very keen, and I can identify even the faintest sounds, such as the nibbling of a little mouse or the scratching of a bird on the roof, or a distant sound.--Except that I was partially deafened in my right ear due to an accident which occurred when I was 14 at the Miami Air show, to which we teenage boys went for all the excitement and thrill of the air races.
         3. I made the mistake of deciding to pay the fare and fly upside-down in a flight trainer, at which time my right ear suddenly seemed like it burst, and I developed an aneurism (a permanent swelling of an artery or vein) in the blood vessel there, which is a swollen, balloonlike problem. This seemed to damage my right ear in some way. I don't know whether it was the eardrum or what. But it did seem to hinder my hearing in my right ear so that I became partially hearing-impaired, partially deaf in that ear, and have been ever since. But as a result, my left ear became even more keen.--For which I'm very thankful, because that's on the side that Mama talks to me when she lies with me in bed, and I'm very able to hear her faintest whisper, praise the Lord!

Sudden Deafness!

         4. --That is, I was, until this morning when I woke up, and was suddenly deaf in my left ear!--A disability which came as quite a shock! I've had a little trouble with that ear off and on in recent years because it developed a considerable amount of wax, which would sometimes briefly impair my hearing until I got it cleaned out with a tissue and my left little finger. But it had never been so completely stopped up as it was this morning. So I was rather startled and suddenly wondering what it would be like to be so deaf--partially deaf in my right ear and almost totally deaf in my left!
         5. I began listening for the usual sounds that I'm familiar with, to see which I could hear and which I couldn't. Internal sounds were still quite clear, such as the grinding and cracking of my teeth and burping and movements of gas or air in my throat, and I even scratched my head to see if I could still hear that. And due to the cranial bone conduction, I could still clearly hear that. I later found out that I could still clearly hear my own voice as well, which I'm now hearing as I talk to you. But distant sounds were quite faint.
         6. The sounds of neighbors or passing automobiles seemed to fade away completely. I even thought the refrigerator had gone off, but by putting my ear close to it, I could still hear it purring. But even other nearby sounds seemed quite faint, such as the sounds that I love to hear, like the chirping of the birds and the whispering of the wind. These old familiar pleasant and enjoyable sounds that I love seemed to be gone entirely, and I began to wonder what it was going to be like to be almost totally deaf.
         7. I wondered how Mama and I were going to get along with her almost totally blind and me almost totally deaf! I've found that Mama's blindness has caused her to develop much keener hearing, so perhaps my deafness would improve my other senses. Thank God I could still talk and hear the sound of my voice, and I was thankful that physical deafness would not interfere with the sound of the Lord's voice in my heart and mind. I could still hear from Him clearly, thank the Lord!
         8. In some ways it was a blessing! I thought it could be a blessing, because there are lots of things that I'd just as soon not hear, and that I don't like to hear.--Such as the sounds of this wicked world and its noisy music and its very annoying vehicular traffic. All this seemed now distant and far away and only faint, thank the Lord.
         9. I thought, well, deafness is not too bad! At least there are a lot of things you don't have to hear any more, thank the Lord. As the famous poet Wordsworth once wrote, "The world is too much with us," and its noises and noise pollution are certainly entirely too much with us. For those of us who have very good and keen hearing, it's often very annoying.
         10. So I thought, as I sat up to write my log, that there are worse things than being deaf, and if I had to, I could live with it. I hadn't told Mama yet. She was still asleep because it was quite early in the morning, about five o'clock, so I just went about my early morning writing and studying, and experimenting with my newfound disability, trying to learn what I could hear and what I could not. The Lord seemed to give me perfect peace about it and helped me not to worry, and I could see how I could live with it if I had to, as you can with many types of disabilities, without them necessarily interfering with your work and your service for the Lord.
         11. I think it was a test to see how I would take it and whether I would get upset about it and worry about it, or whether I would calmly receive it and do the best I could with it until the Lord did otherwise. And of course, due to your prayers and so many people praying for me, how could I have anything very long that would prevent me from doing my work for the Lord! So it wasn't very long afterwards that suddenly my left ear popped open and I could hear clearly again!

A Lesson in Not Fearing a Disability!

         12. So all in all, though it was a rather frustrating experience at first, all's well that ends well, and everything that happens to the Lord's children is for the best and for the good of that child to teach us a lesson. "All things work together for good to them who love the Lord" (Rom.8:28). I'm now well and strong with good eyesight, fairly good hearing, excellent sense of smell and taste and feeling, and very physically active, strong and well, thank the Lord, and thanks to your prayers.
         13. And I had a good lesson in not fearing a disability and even being willing to accept it, if necessary, if it would help my hearing the Lord. Like with Mama's eyes, if it would improve my service for the Lord, it would be worth it! Mama has actually dictated more Letters than when her sight was unimpaired. She was too busy then reading and absorbing all the problems of the whole earth to spend much time giving forth or writing you about your problems and their solutions, and giving words of encouragement and inspiration.

Benefits of a Handicap!

         14. So there are benefits to a handicap in some ways. I'm sure the Lord will not allow you to be afflicted more than you're able to bear, or in a way that will keep you from bearing fruit. Praise the Lord! Even my eating handicap has proven a blessing in disguise. I don't crave food so much any more or have to spend so much time eating it and digesting it, and I'm in just as good or better health than ever before. And He has used Mama's blindness to cause her to work even harder.
         15. So there are often benefits to some handicaps, thank the Lord, and the Lord never allows anything to happen to you except that which is for your good and your testing and training and learning and to your advantage, as I've written in several Letters on "The Advantage of a Handicap" long ago.--And it might be well for you to read those once again after this one. (See "Handicapped?--It Can Be a Blessing!" ML #830; "The Advantage of a Handicap!" ML #1111; and "The Advantage of a Handicap--#2!" ML #1937.)
         16. So cheer up! If you've suffered an illness, an accident or an injury or some difficulty that the Devil has tried to discourage you with and make you feel like, "Well, it's all over now! I can't do anything now, I'm not much use to anybody and I guess I'll have to suffer this for the rest of my life unless the Lord miraculously heals me!"--Cheer up! Look up! Rev up and revere the Lord and respect and honor Him and have faith and belief in Him that you can be healed or overcome it, one or the other, whatever's best for you.
         17. The Apostle Paul suffered a thorn in the flesh for many years, perhaps even until his death. And from what he wrote, it sounds like it was poor eyesight. (See Gal.4:13-15.) But whatever it was, he said it was a "messenger of Satan" sent and allowed by the Lord to help keep him humble, and it certainly did the trick! (2Cor.12:7-9).
         18. So, do you need a handicap? Do you need some kind of trial or test or difficulty to teach you some lesson so that you might learn to be a better servant of the Lord? If so, rejoice and be glad in it and thank the Lord for it, and trust Him that He will not give you more than you can bear, but will soon deliver you if it's good for you to be delivered. Praise the Lord!
         19. So "Keep your eyes on Jesus! Do not watch the waves! Keep your eyes on Jesus, it's faith in Him that saves! Keep your eyes on Jesus, His promises avail! Keep your eyes on Jesus, His Word will never fail!" Thank You Lord! And keep on keeping on for Jesus no matter what! Amen? Praise the Lord? Hallelujah? Thank You Jesus? Can you praise Him and thank Him even for your trials and testings and tribulations?--Trusting that they'll do you good and make you stronger and a better witness for the Lord? Thank You Lord!
         20. God bless you! We know that whatever happens to you as God's child is good for you, and "all things work together for good to them that love the Lord," and will make you a better servant of the Lord and a better witness for Him, and a stronger soldier for the fight! Praise the Lord! God bless you and keep you! We pray for you and we love you, and will forever, thank the Lord! So until next time, keep going for the Lord no matter what! In Jesus' name, amen!--Do you?



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