the grapevine
(Issue #20; June 1, 1997)
The Grapevine consists of news and views from Family members, and is not intended to reflect WS policy.
Copyright 1997 by The Family
The Grapevine
PO Box 4938
Orange, CA 92863 USA
e-mail: grape@ibm.net
kidbits
* Ben Christian, born to Becky Numbers. -- Australia
* Twins Christina Maria and Adriana Teresa, born to Ruthie and David. -- Taiwan
* Tina Chiemi, born to Faith and Jonathan. -- Japan
* Yurika Marianella, born to Faith and Tommy. -- Japan
* Brian Knight, 7thchild, born to Jewel and Philip on March 23rd. -- Canada
* Patrick Nicolas, born to Patience and Jonathan. -- Hungary
* Baby girl (no name given), born to Joan and James. -- Denmark
* Kaden Shane, 1st child, born to Liefke. -- USA
* Cathy Sherice, 1st child, born to Naomi and Simon. -- Europe
tidbits
* New disciple! Ivan Polecki (25, Russian). -- Russia
* Peter BigHeart and Esther Love were betrothed on April 10th, at a fun and meaningful ceremony at home with our catacombers present. Peter and Esther took the previous evening off to hold vigil with the Lord, while the rest of us heard from the Lord for them as a wedding present. We had a "pyramid of love" wedding cake and a delicious Kazak style lamb meal, along with a talent night and dancing to celebrate! The Lord also supplied a free three-day stay for them at a hotel in Chimbulak, the world famous ski resort above Almaty. -- Matthew, Marie, Yana and Peter, Kazakhstan
world news
Encyclopedia Britannica (CD version) entry on The Family
Family of Love -- Formerly CHILDREN OF GOD, or TEENS FOR CHRIST: Religious group, generally considered to be part of the Jesus Movement, begun by David Berg, an itinerant preacher, in 1968. Originally called Teens for Christ, the group originated in California, U.S., and attracted alienated middle-class youth.
The original members, who were renamed Children of God by a journalist, began to wander through several other states, and as the movement gained followers, it spread to countries worldwide. Berg, who became known as Moses, withdrew from the day-to-day operations of the group in the early 1970s. He continued to communicate with members through "Mo letters," some of which were collected and published. In the early 1980s the group was renamed Family of Love.
Members of the group, which practices a form of charismatic Christianity, generally live in communal colonies. Its ministry includes youth-oriented nightclubs, musical groups, street theatre, speaking in tongues (glossolalia), and aggressive proselytizing. Many of its practices, especially with regard to recruitment of new members, have been severely criticized. Groups of parents claimed that their children were hypnotized and brainwashed by the movement.
Collage of responses to our Family WEB Site!
-- from Trust and Arrow (LAMB Home), USA
Peru - I am 26, an economist and director/general manager of a magazine. Some members of your community in Lima gave me some literature about your group. I would like to know how to become a member of your community. -- Lucien
Australia - I am a student at Sydney University. I chose your religion to study because I knew nothing about it, except the fuss in the papers a few years ago when your children were removed. I have read your WEB pages, and am incredulous at what you have done, and the message you have. I really like what your founder said: that there is a need for change. -- Helen
USA - I have read about the Children of God and The Family and would like to know if you still exist in a commune setting in the United States. Are you actively searching for new members? I am a Christian, looking to give more to Christ. I come to you with an open mind and an open heart. -- Marc
Latin America - It is a joy to have met you again after so many years. I have never forgotten the happiest moments of my life that I shared with you. The Word we received in the Family remains unerasable. Please tell me where I can get the lit in Spanish. --Jeremy
UK - I know God wants me to join the Family and it is something that I have thought a lot about. I don't know where to look; I feel lost. PLEASE respond to my message! Your WEB site has spoken to me. I await your reply. -- Nick
Germany - I found the inspirational readings in the Daily Might [on the WEB site] very good and helpful for daily Christian life. Would you please send me such a Daily Might? -- Rudolf
I am part of a six-member East Indian rock band that tours the world. We just returned from India, where we performed several high-profile shows at the Taj five-star hotel chain in Delhi, Madras, and Bombay. During my visit to Bombay, I had the pleasure of "bumping into" one of your members. We spent one afternoon together, and it was an awesome experience. I told them that one day I may run away and join them. -- Jas
I just saw your WWW pages and I'm very interested in joining the Family. Are there any Homes in Europe? I feel something is missing in my life. -- Rob
I gave some spare change to some people on the street the other day and they gave me your pamphlet. I want to let you know that you are doing a great job! -- Cassidy
Great work! I love your home page; it has all the answers to my questions about God and the afterlife. You are so cool!!! -- James
I purchased a few Heaven's Magic tapes in 1988 when I lived in Japan. I've been on the Net for awhile and thought I'd see if you folks were still around; I just found your excellent WEB site. How can I get more of your tapes? -- Walter
WEB Stats for the month of April
Number of visits to our home page: 1,954 (Many people log on directly to other pages, while others visit the home page more than once, so the number of visitors could actually be more than this. This number has been steadily increasing!)
Number of distinct files requested: 2,373 (Many files are downloaded several times, but this shows how many unique files were downloaded.)
Number of distinct hosts served: 1,488 (This shows how many different "hosts" or people logged in. Some of these people log in more than once, of course. This shows how much widespread activity our site is getting!)
Total bytes transferred: 745 Megabytes (This includes any Family material, and graphics, audio and video files. Transferred means that they logged on to a page with that information, which was then transferred to their computer.)
Average bytes transferred per day: 25 Megabytes.
E-mail received: 137
-- GP: 76
-- DO: 21
-- TS: 13
-- Former Members: 27
E-mail sent: 99
-- GP: 57
-- DO: 28 (RE: GP e-mail)
-- TS: 5
-- Former Members: 9
brotherhood
Hungary
(From Joy, Genai, Steve and Rosa [VS team]:) We held a four-day YA/senior teen meeting for all those in the Southeastern Europe area. There were 70 attendees. We had discussions, prophecy sessions, Charter studies and Word classes on the subject of learning to use the new spiritual weapons the Lord has given us, as well as brainstormed practical ways to help the younger ones in our area.
India
(From Andrew and Carina [SGA/VSs]:) Thirty JETTs and teens from Southern India gathered together for a rock'm sock'm JETT/teen camp! We watched some of the Summit and U.S. delegates' meeting videos, enjoyed each other's fellowship, and got tanked up, both by the Word and by hearing from the Lord! When the camp first began, there were a few cool cliques and "trips" here and there, but by the end of the camp the Lord had melted everyone together!
The senior teens led the inspirations and skits, and helped with talk times and shepherding. They were good counselors and wholehearted. It was inspiring to see the bellwether vision come to pass in our senior teens, who are serious about their job of winning this battle for their brothers and sisters.
Australia
(From Jeff:) Christie and Paul Silver (VSs) and I are holding a JETT/junior teen meeting, following the senior teens/YA/SGA meetings just held in Sydney. The most thrilling thing was to see the YAs and senior teens leading the meetings and being so inspired about doing this for their younger brothers and sisters. Out of the 23 YA/seniors who attended the meeting we held for them, 17 of them stayed on to help prepare the JETT/junior teen meeting. They are teaching classes, leading inspirations and skits, doing the scheduling and camp management, cooking, being room captains, etc. The classes have been complete with skits, a live band, games, treasure hunts, and more! -- And of course the Word! They are fresh and original, and it's thrilling to see how the young people present things in such a simple, funny and relatable way!
An exciting point of the senior teen/YA/SGA meeting was their enthusiasm to receive prophecies. Each time we needed to hear from the Lord about something, we asked for volunteers and a group would get together right away to hear from the Lord. There was a real excitement in the air about it. Some of the YAs got up early the first morning of the JETT camp, as they wanted to receive something special from the Lord to share with the JETTs in the keynote session!
Venezuela
(From Gary and Sharon [SGA/VSs]:) While visiting this country we held a meeting with the teens in the area. We showed the U.S. delegates' meeting videos, which they reacted very positively to. We had personal time with each one, and held open forum meetings, etc.
ASCRO
(From ASCRO:) We'll be holding a JETT/junior teen camp for around 60 young people from the Thai/Malaysia/Vietnam/Burma area from May 31st to June 8th at the Thailand Training Center.
pioneering
Mideast
(From Meekness:) We were just leaving an office when we began chatting with one of the secretaries. She was from Iraq, and had left the country when the Gulf War first began. The rest of her family remained there, and she has been very lonely ever since. After a couple of minutes of conversation, she asked if we had books for 10- to 12-year-old children. She learned of our videos and tapes, and bought one tape to send to her nephew and nieces in Iraq.
Then she explained her request for children's books. Her 12-year-old nephew had just written her, mentioning that he enjoys reading, but that due to UN sanctions there are no books available in Iraq. Iraq has had no paper or ink since the sanctions began six years ago; even academic exercise books for children have had to be imported by the Red Cross or the UN. Her nephew was asking her if she could send him some books. Her salary is low, so she was desperate about finding some way of filling her nephew's request.
Hearing this touched my heart, and since it has been our burden for years to reach Iraq in the Lord's time, I wanted to send something for this boy to read. I offered to photocopy all the DF classes that we have available in Arabic. She gladly paid for the photocopying cost, and I returned the next day with about 50 pages of Arabic materials. She put them in a plastic folder and will send them by courier with someone who is traveling to Iraq. She also bought a second copy of our Arabic Happy all the Time tape. We sent a personal note to her nephew and nieces and their family with the lit, so we may hear from them soon. It is so inspiring to see the words and music of David reaching places we are unable to visit in person!
Slovenia
(From the Ljubljana Home:) It all started five years ago when the Family had to leave Sarajevo, leaving behind a local group of sheep to carry on the work. Two of them in particular, Edi and Sheana, faithfully carried on witnessing during the war. They held meetings with the other sheep, and soon their flock grew to 150 members!
Then the authorities found out about their gatherings and forbade them to hold any more meetings. Two of the closest sheep they were feeding were a young couple named Sanja and Sasha. Despite the persecution and the war, they continued to read the Word and wrote us faithfully, even though they had never personally met any full-time Family members.
Early this year, we made a trip to Sarajevo, and learned from the other catacombers that Sasha and Sanja were living in Slovenia. After prayer and getting the Lord's confirmation, we decided to take a side journey there to meet them. Miraculously the Lord supplied free hotel rooms for three days in the same hotel they were staying at! We were thrilled to discover how hungry they were for the Word, and were moved to tears when they showed us the Word they had preserved during these five years: a stack of Letters stapled together and browning with age.
We presented them with some of our more recent pubs, plus the Treasures and Word Basics, which they immediately dug into. We gave them daily classes during the two days we spent with them. They would come to class with their questions written down, and would eagerly listen to the answers we gave from the Word.
After this initial encounter, they visited our Home for two days for more classes and fellowship. They have now decided to join, and have moved in for their trial period. They're doing great! It's beautiful to see the fruit of faithful follow-up through the mail ministry, which is very evident in the lives of these precious sheep -- now new disciples!
studio news
Brazil
(From Michael [Micah] and Paul [Pethuel]:) Thanks to all your prayers, we're up and running here in sunny Rio! We've got some exciting projects on our plate, including the FAST (Family Adult Song Tapes; it was decided to not call them FAT, ha!) - with songs geared mainly to adult tastes. We have already begun recording and have at least 20 or more songs on our list to record, including some oldie-goldies done with a new twist and a lot of brand new ones! Fun! We also have a host of new praise songs with some sweet rhythms and new voices -- maybe some Portuguese and Spanish! Who knows?!
(From another report:) The Lord has blessed us with a nice-sized studio with a large control room and a separate isolation room for voices, guitars, and drums. -- Yes, we use live drums! Our band drummer is a live-out disciple who comes in for recordings. We're great fans of acoustic-based arrangements and getting the optimum out of the sounds of a few instruments, rather than filling the track up with a lot of pads and keyboards. We're not doing very little sequencing.
We're not really a country-western outfit, and are playing less and less of that style, moving into more of an acoustic soft-rock style using the standard country instruments like the pedal steel and banjo in a more contemporary way. We're stereo recording the acoustic guitars, and have a semi-acoustic bass, from which we're taking the sound from the pick-up and a microphone at the same time for a very unusual sound.
BAS
(From Julia, for BAS:) We've had quite a bout of song-writing recently. At the moment we have about 15 new songs in for approval. Lord willing, there's something to suit most people's musical tastes: blues, ballads, techno, dance, ethnic African, funk and more -- you name it, it's coming! Besides the many songs being written here, there are also quite a few in the works from non-resident musicians.
Eman and Katrina are now the proud parents of their fourth child, and fourth boy (how do they do it?)! As you can see, at BAS we not only produce music, we also ... ahem! Well anyway, his name is Shane (Gaelic version of John)! Congratulations, guys! Keep "going for the gold," but, hey, leave some medals for us, will you!?
PAS
(From the PAS team:) We've got some good news for all you Latin music lovers out there! We're on the final stretch -- just two songs away from releasing the Latin music CD. With a little help from our friends at JAS (GBT for their help with singing, fine-tuning and final mixing some of the songs), this CD is almost on its way to final mastering. The last stop is Paulo, who will finalize and final mix the last two songs. So hang on, everyone, Latin music is coming your way soon. It adds variety and is far-out for dance nights!
We've also completed the recording and final mixing of To Ivan (Treasure Attic) #10. Jonathan Nubes visited us for a few weeks, and was able to record the Spanish audio tape, A Labor of Love, as well as translate and record the GP video All that Believe.
Another exciting project in the works is a Loving Jesus tape in Spanish. -- It's kind of like Open for Love and Desiring You, but in Spanish, with new and old compositions done in a new way for this new day. The Lord has been pouring down some pretty cool stuff in Spanish, so keep us in your prayers -- we need them!
mama's mailbox
Dear Mama,
You know, ever since I've been a teen, my dream was to find a guy who would love me enough to say, "I don't care how long it takes; I'll be with you and care for you because I love you. -- When you are ready, I'll be there." Now I've found my dream Man. -- That's just what Jesus said in the prophecies you sent me. When I read that, it was like I'd finally found where and to Whom I belong.
-- a female (17), Russia
Dear Mama,
I love the latest GNs. Recently a teen boy asked me if I read everything that comes in, and I answered "yes." He replied, "But it doesn't say in the Charter that you have to read everything." I explained to him that if I don't read everything, I feel like I am missing something; if I am not careful to follow the New Wine word-for-word, then I feel disoriented.
Awhile ago, you asked the Lord if you were giving us too much to swallow, but the Lord said He wanted you and Peter to keep giving it out. I'm very thankful for this. Although at times I feel like I can't catch up, I also remember times when we had the same mailings for a few weeks and I always wished we could get more.
-- a female SGA (22), Austria
Dear Mama and Peter,
In "Go for the Gold" it was mentioned how some people see children as a financial burden. I remember struggling financially at the time of the RNR. We really had to scrape by, and the government was going to sue us for back taxes. When praying with my wife about whether we could continue to serve the Lord with four small children, the Lord showed us to gear our schedule around the children. He wanted us, as parents, to live for the children and witness through our children. Shortly after this we went on the road. Once we made the decision to put the children first, we never had any more financial problems. Instead of the government suing us, the Lord supplied a large amount of money through the government that enabled us to buy a caravan.
With my second family it has been the same. We have found that if we give our children the right priority, they are only a blessing -- even financially speaking. And it looks like the Lord is sending our family another baby this month!
-- from an adult man, Europe
Dearest Mama and Peter,
I love you so much! I'm an SGA single mom. My young son is quite a handful, but there's never been one second that I've not wanted him. I'm truly blessed! He's got a wonderful spirit. When first pregnant, I was tempted to think that I'd done the wrong thing by going all the way (I got pregnant before "Go For the Gold" came out). I thought I might have done things differently if I'd read that first, but the Lord showed me clearly that it was His will and that He would be my Husband. I took His Word at face value and began acting like He was my Husband. I include Him in on everything to do with me and the baby. Needless to say, He has been better than all my dreams!
-- from a female SGA, Europe
babymania
-- by Jaz, Free Zine country
There is no day like the day that you get your first contribution to a new pub or column! Today was that day, and it was immortalized forever: May 6th, 1997 -- the day I got my first Babymania response. (Well, if you're thinking that's a long time ago -- it takes a while from the time I write this column till it goes through all the steps of checking, layout, printing, mailing, etc., etc. You know!)
So thank you, Joy, for making my day! And here it is, folks -- the true voice of experience, coming to you direct from Hungary.
ATTENTION ALL BABY BOUNCERS!
Bouncing your baby to sleep, or to keep it quiet, may be a great solution for the moment, but ... babies grow! And as they grow, they get heavier! And as they get heavier you'll end up doing a major workout to get them to go sleep at night. (And perhaps during the night too!)
Preventative Action: Pat, rock or sing (Jaz: Or nurse!) your babies to sleep, and if they're fussy during the day, give them a toy, or a change of scenery or diaper before picking them up. If you routinely pick them up and start to "shake" them to keep them quiet for a few more minutes, you're instilling a bad habit in them and you'll pay for it in the long run. (Oops!)
Have you ever heard someone lament that a baby wants to be carried all the time? Well, more often than not it's because someone (unintentionally, of course) carried that baby around from the time they were just starting life outside the womb -- so that's all they know! Although babies (before birth) are used to sleeping in their mom's womb while she's moving around, they're very adaptable and can learn the "new" way of going to sleep real quick if you'll teach them.
Fact: Did you know that most babies can go to sleep peacefully in their beds with a little rock, or maybe just with a nice tape playing and a prayer?
Now doesn't that take a load off? Let's train 'em right!
-- From Joy (of Ben G.); a mother of three who learned the hard way!
(Jaz:) Of course, this is not to say that you should never pick up, carry or walk around with your baby when he or she's fussy. This was actually a bit of a dilemma for me at first, because people told me, "Don't carry her around, or she'll want it nonstop!" And then I felt guilty every time I needed to pick her up! So while the above is very true, on the other side, sometimes it is needed. -- Especially when they are tiny, and need to feel the comfort and closeness till they get used to being an individual, and not inside of you. So just make sure that you try those other diversions first, and don't get into a habit of doing something you're not gonna want to keep up for the next year or two!
Here's a very good quote on that: "Spoiling is caused when the mother persists at something the baby no longer needs. If your baby needs patting or rocking to go to sleep, then pat and rock him. If he no longer really needs it after a few times or a few days but you persist out of habit, he may become dependent on it. So spoiling is usually the mother's habit, and not the baby's. If your baby is crying or discontent, prayerfully consider what he needs. The Lord is always so faithful to give answers." (CCHB 1, pg.276)
In other words: Scenario 1 -- Baby cries. Not hungry or tired? Not soiled? Not interested in toys anymore? Okay, you pick him up. (That will not spoil baby.) Scenario 2 -- Baby is happily playing. You pick him up and carry him around all afternoon. Baby wakes up and gurgles. You pick him up and carry him around all day. Baby is bored and fusses. You pick him up and carry him. Then one day he gets heavy and you put him down. What do you suppose his reaction will be?
think deep
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.
find-a-friend
* Nicole (formerly Elixir) is looking for David (teen, of Peter and Maria). I knew you in Ecuador. Add: P.F. 701/1029, 1399 Budapest, Hungary.
* Claire is looking for Malika (Joey) and others I've lost contact with. Add: Akio Matsuoka, PO Box 851, CPO Tokyo 100-91, Japan (Attn: Claire).
* Samara (Brasilian) of Ron Clous, please write to Mercy (Angela and Hez). Add: Martinelli C.P. 22-516, Bucharest, sector 1, Romania. E-mail: bucgp@mail.rtns.ro.
* The Kenya Family's new e-mail add is: action@form-net.com.
* Abner (of Ben and Maggie) is looking for Dan (of Obadias and Kalita). Lived in Brazil together in '92-'93. Contact Abner via Russian ABM.
* Sharon Starlight (formerly Clara) wants to contact Alais, Rima, Angelina, Benji, Pricilla and Magdeline. Add: Caixa Postal 799, Cep: 85851-970, Foz do Igua, Brazil.
* Adria Joy, please write to Anisa. Add: Cx. Postal 02962, Brasilia, DF cep. 71609-970 Brazil.
what's up?
Answering the call
USA
(From Ado and Kanah:) During the DO/TS fellowships held last year, one of the recurring heartcries of the parents of JETTs and junior teens was that our younger ones need to feel more a part of the Family through association with peers and Family members who can have a positive influence in their lives. Many parents expressed the need to have regular get-togethers for our younger folks, which would include interesting activities geared specifically to their age group and understanding to aid their spiritual development and help them develop skills for their future ministries.
Since we are mobile, and have been focusing on working with JETTs and junior teens here in the Western US, the idea came to hold "Mini-Kamps." These camps are bi-monthly four-day get-togethers of six to 10 DO and TS JETTs or junior teens, centered around a certain theme. These are sponsored by DO or TS Homes throughout the area. We attend each of these camps to participate in the shepherding of the JETTs and junior teens.
These camps have a theme or main attraction, around which other activities are scheduled. The JETTs and junior teens spend four or five hours a day involved in these particular activities, aside from devotions, Word studies, personal talk-time, get-out, inspirations, and time spent establishing a personal contact with them. -- The goal being to instill in them our Family values and to strengthen their relationship with Jesus. Following are some themes we came up with:
* An active "Consider the Poor" ministry: feeding the homeless, food distribution to American Indians, disaster relief, etc.
* Computers, mechanics, sewing, dancing, singing, guitar, piano, sign language or other such skills.
* A tour of a special location which played a part in Family history, or someplace mentioned in the Letters or one of Dad's dreams, etc.
* Natural wonders, parks, mountains, etc.
* A witnessing ministry or Home ministry that provides a special service to other Homes.
* Testimonies and firsthand accounts from those who have returned from foreign mission fields for visits or visa purposes. They could give testimonies of what it is like in their mission fields, complete with pictures, maps, etc.
* Horse care and riding.
* Interesting factories or manufacturers in your area where you could take a small group on a tour. Visiting a farmer whose crop needs harvesting or special care; perhaps he'd like to teach some young people about it.
We arranged faith trips to Mexico and sent notices to all the Homes in the US, offering to take any JETTs or junior teens (DO or TS) that wanted to go. We had so many requests for the first two planned trips that we planned another one, and still we had many on waiting lists in case of cancellations. YAs, senior teens and OCs began writing in asking if there were also going to be road trips for their age groups. It seems there is a big need for this type of thing.
Our first trip was composed of 14 teens (half TS and half DO). Status didn't make much difference in their attitudes and hearts, as we found out. What made the difference was their relationship with Jesus and the Word.
We had a memory project for the trip, and daily Word time. Some teens hadn't memorized for years, and others weren't used to witnessing. Some who were nervous about witnessing or provisioning at first, by the end they were some of the first ones to jump up when volunteers were needed. We had quite a mixture of personalities, attitudes, home lifestyles and backgrounds, which made for an interesting first few days as we got to know each other. However, it was amazing how the Lord molded us together -- in part by living in such close quarters -- and we all got to know each other well.
We received donations from the JETTs and teens' parents that covered about 20% of the gasoline needed. The plan was to provision and poster for our needs, and the Lord was so good to us. We did have a few flat tires and a frozen bearing, but the Lord helped us through each step. These first road trips have been a fun and memorable experience for all.
Milestone accomplishment
USA
(From Andrew and Crystal Do-It:) We went one entire year without any System television in our Home -- no antenna reception! The results: increased outdoor activities, a quieter atmosphere in the Home, and more cooperation on jobs and schoolwork to be able to participate in video time!
Saint Alex
Ukraine
(From Valour, Trust, Christina and Joy:) MM member Alexander (Saint Alex, as we call him) is a funny 62-year-old character who has been a believer since his youth. He has been preaching the Gospel for 40 years all over Russia, while working as a miner. Now he lives off his pension and travels with the electric trains all over the Ukraine, witnessing and distributing lit. He almost cried for joy when he saw the stack of posters we dropped off for him. He kissed the picture of Jesus on the "Come" poster, and told us we could never give him enough. He said, "Now is the time for sowing. Time is short."
One evening we parked our caravan in his driveway. There was a thunderstorm, and he entertained us by candlelight, telling us testimonies of his adventurous life. People have tried to kill him four times, including his own father, who was a top officer in the Soviet army. He started a church in his own village, but soon told the congregation to find another preacher. "I'm going witnessing!" he told them.
Single-handedly
Australia
(From Lamb:) I took a team of 10 (eight of my kids and two of their friends) on the road for a two-week SWIFT. Our first stop was a beautiful beachfront site -- one of the Lord's treats -- where we got to see 16 dolphins playing in the surf, board riders, kangaroos grazing, etc.
Before leaving, I had provisioned lodging at a beautiful caravan park. The girls did a show for the campground while there, and the owner's son and his friend passed a hat around and collected a good donation to see us on our way. During our trip the Lord provided meals, petrol and beautiful hotel rooms for the 11 of us. It was a very inspiring and faith-building trip. -- It can be done!
your views on issues
Not losing contact
Japan
(From Marie Claire:) Over three years ago, my best friend left the Family. We continued to write each other, and I visited her from time to time when I was in the States. When she was working on her thesis in college, Ado (of Kanah) helped to supply her with material on the subject she was writing about. This, and the fact that she knew she could call him anytime with her questions, or when she needed counsel about something, made her feel that he really loved her and was concerned about her.
In one of her recent letters, she said, "It's always a great day when a letter from you arrives! You're the only one out of all my friends in the Family who ever wrote me after I left. A sign of a true friendship is someone who loves you no matter what you do, or who you are." Her letter helped me realize how much it means to someone who has left to know that they are still loved, and that we don't look down on them for the life they have chosen. I think this would help a lot of our young people who leave the Family to feel more loved, if someone -- or better yet, if someones -- keeps in touch with them.
Are you afraid?
EE
(From an adult man [almost 50]:) Here's a question to our younger members: It's my impression that our JETTs, junior teens and often our senior teens, YAs -- and, yes, dare I say SGAs -- are afraid to have anything to do with the "older" generation. Maybe I am wrong; perhaps this is only the case with the young people in our Home and those passing through, but it seems that most of our young people are afraid to hug or kiss someone from the "older" generation.
I guess you think we don't need affection? -- Or maybe that we don't need it from you young ones? Maybe I'm coming on too strong. But guess what? We love you younger ones, and although we're a little (okay, a lot!) older, that doesn't mean we don't need the Lord's love through you! I'm just talking about normal affection -- a hug and kiss after devotions, instead of just jumping up and running off, or a "good morning" when we first see each other.
That was what really touched me when I first met the Family: the love that was shown between members -- and even non-members like me at the time. Have we lost this love for each other? Have we become stiff and formal like the churches? Any of you young people care to answer this? Love you lots!
(From Jenna [22]: Dear Almost 50, I can't resist commenting. Your article nearly made me weep! Unfortunately, if I were to be honest, I would have to admit that the above scenario you described sounds much like my teen years. I don't know what my rationale was for "keeping my distance," but I can happily say that in recent years, since opening up to the "older" generation and letting them into my life, I have gained trusted friends and terrific co-workers! I think this generational barrier exists largely within our minds, but thankfully, with a step of faith and some outgoing and simple, loving interaction, the situation can be reversed and remedied, as I have experienced. I only hope and pray that other young people will try it a lot sooner than I did.)
Who they listen to
Asia
(From an adult man:) We're seeing how our kids are drawn to older teens and YAs. They'll take things from them that they won't take from us. After watching a movie with the teens, during a pow-wow time afterwards, I began to make a comment. The teens visibly tuned me out and I stopped speaking. Then our YA daughter began to talk, and everyone turned around and listened attentively to her. She brought out the exact same point I'd wanted to, and everyone listened and "took it" from her. It would be so helpful if there were some way to make an emphasis on having a committed young person (senior teen, YA or SGA) who wants to do their best for the Lord in each of our Homes.
A System desire
Russia
(From Matthew [22]:) Before joining the Family, whenever I came in contact with Family young people I was excited, as I could easily relate to, understand, and be friends with them. However, sometimes I wondered why they were so interested in talking about the System. Why was their fascination for the world and desire to look like those in the world so strong? The Family young people had what I had been looking for all my life, but they didn't seem to appreciate it. They were interested in, and sometimes admired, the exact things that I hated. (I don't mean to generalize, because I have met many Family-born teens and YAs who were a sample of loving disciples.)
Living most of my life in the System, I found nothing that could make me glad or satisfy me. Instead, I felt caught in the labyrinth of confusing passions, views and ideas, and in the terrible death-bound process of spiritual slavery. When I met the Family and began to feed from the Word, my life changed and I found something more than my own pitiful existence. I found the true love of Jesus and I accepted His calling. The Word delivered me from the evil influence of heavy metal and hard rock music.
It's the Devil trying to get at us from within to destroy our usefulness to the Lord by displaying before our eyes his "riches" and seducing us with false charms of this world in order to take our minds off of Jesus and His vision. The Lord has solutions, but we have to do our part by yielding to Him in order to win this war!
Partial excom
Africa
(From a female SGA:) I enjoy reading about others of my peers who have gone through partial excom. When I found myself there, I wondered if anyone else had ever sinned as badly as I had. So any of you who have gone through it: "Welcome to the club!" To any of you who fear you may in the future, don't worry. You may feel like you're dying, but remember, God's way up is down!
This quote from the "90 Basic Letters" reading list sums it up beautifully: "The list is almost endless again, of all the people God had to humble before He could use them. ... Because by the time God's ready to make you really great, He makes absolutely nothing out of you, so it's only Jesus! He has to break you and humble you and melt you in the fire, purge you, purify you, sift you, beat out the chaff! He has to beat the hell out of you, till there's none of it left -- crucify the flesh till it's dead as a doornail -- mortify the mind, till it's almost gone -- so that Jesus can live and think and move in you" (ML #35:10)!
Don't worry, you couldn't be worse than me (two partial excoms in two years)! I can be pretty thick, but if He can use Balaam's ass ...
roll that gold!
Countdown to Armageddon
South Africa
(From Leyland Valentine [of Spring]:) Countdown to Armageddon has been one of the greatest tools that we have had to share with the Christian world. We got out over 100 the first week, and the reactions have been thrilling!
Christians say how the video opened the Scriptures about the Endtime to them. One company director bought three to distribute amongst his church youth groups. One man, a prison officer who had seen the video "only 20 times!" got so turned on that he came to visit our Home to find out more. He also invited us to his prison to witness to the prisoners. We've found that lending this video to our friends and using it as a tool to witness has borne more fruit than solely being commercially minded and feeling we have to "sell" it to everyone.
Ground-breaking approach
USA
(From Patrick Meek [of Christina]:) One approach I have found useful in personal witnessing here is the "Loving Jesus" revelation. The kids of today are very New-Agey. New Age is influenced by eastern religions -- mostly Hinduism. Having learned to witness to Buddhists and Hindus during our time on the field has been helpful. As Dad taught us, it is very difficult to tell a Buddhist that he is a sinner, so you've got to use another approach.
These New-Age kids seem to react similarly. So offering Jesus as a Lover who seeks to woo us into His Kingdom -- the same way a man woos a woman -- is hard to resist. A true lover always forgives, understands, helps and does all these things that people are craving for in their lives. I start my witness by using verses out of the book of the Song of Solomon, and it goes really well!
Canning with posters
USA
(From Joy Cherub [of Jareb]:) Some people tend to look on canning as just a fast and effective way to raise funds, but a method whereby you don't talk to people much. However, I feel our Home has reached a fairly good balance. Canning helps us to bring in the funds so that we are able to do other things such as CTP, other forms of witnessing and follow-up.
Our Home has started getting out the posters while canning. I've seen some people awestruck because they can tell we're different, and then they give generously and wholeheartedly. Additionally, they are receiving the posters -- which Dad says are our best witnessers.
Rediscovering DTD
USA
(From Free Joppa:) We have rediscovered the "lost art" of going door-to-door! It seems that after discovering many other ways of witnessing and fund-raising, DTD has been sadly neglected by many. We had been doing a lot of parking-lot postering, shop-to-shop, odd jobs, along with mail ministry, but they didn't seem to be bearing the fruit we thought they should, either spiritually or financially.
One Saturday morning we determined to get out witnessing by 10:00 a.m., and we found a likely place to go. In just half a block of houses we got out three videos, prayed with four people, and met many precious sheep. We are now sold on going DTD, and are thrilled with the many possibilities of meeting sheep, getting out tools, doing follow-up, etc.!
now that's funny!
Walking down the street, a dog saw a sign in an office window: "Help Wanted. Must type 70 words a minute. Must be computer literate. Must be bilingual. --An equal opportunity employer."
The dog applied for the position but was quickly rebuffed. "I can't hire a dog for this job!" the office manager said. But when the dog pointed to the line that read, "An equal opportunity employer," the office manager sighed and asked, "Can you type?" Silently, the dog walked over to a typewriter and flawlessly banged out a letter. "Can you operate a computer?" the manager inquired. The dog sat down at a terminal, wrote a program and ran it perfectly.
"Look! I still can't hire a dog for this position!" said the exasperated office manager. You have fine skills, but I need someone who's bilingual! It says so right on the ad! The dog looked up at the manager and said, "Meow!"
-- courtesy of Amy, USA
ws news
Pubs on the way
Life at Mama's Home is rolling full steam ahead -- that means pubs, pubs, and more pubs! By now you should have gotten the "Spirit Stories" GN, along with the first edition of Heaven's Library -- a new fun reading pub for all! Hope you like it, 'cause there's lots more where that came from! Our goal is to get at least one Heaven's Library storybook to you per month, and maybe more on occasion. Pray in the stories! You can get 'em too! We've already been overjoyed to receive a number of stories from folks on the field!
For your interest, out of the five stories published in Heaven's Library #1, four were received by young people. In Heaven's Library #2, which you should have just received, or will be coming your way in a few days, two of the stories were sent in by folks on the field! -- And just to whet your appetite, there's an intriguing story (or should I say novel?) coming your way shortly thereafter. Oh, did I forget to mention that the spirit-author is Sir Walter Scott? So, take the time to hear from Heaven and send in your story today!
WS book clearance
We're happy to announce a special "giveaway" on nearly all of our Family book titles (ML volumes, DBs, Treasures, etc.)! Any day now you should be receiving a book order form, accompanied by a WS notice, explaining this offer in detail. We're clearing out our storage facilities, and would like to get these thousands of books into your hands -- at no cost to you! It's a limited-time offer, so order soon!
Birthday blast
(From Mama's Home:) Let's see ... on the home front, Rusty turned 21! Of course, we have birthday celebrations regularly, but this was a special one; no doubt you can guess why. Out came the long dining table for this gala event, and in the flickering light of the shallow candles that lined the table, Rusty was treated to a one-of-a-kind dance show, as each of our FGA women took to the table to the apropos tune of "Coming of Age"! Wow! -- Who said getting older was no fun? -- Not Rusty!
Appreciation evening
Another special evening this past month was our appreciation and going-away celebration for one of our dear CROs, who had come for a visit. We were also celebrating the return home of our "away team," Peter, James and Rebecca, who had recently returned from their trip to Japan and Thailand. -- And of course, we seized the opportunity to show our appreciation to our queen as well!
Everyone in the Home pitched in and made one dish (salad, dessert, drink, etc.) to contribute to our varied-but-delicious candlelight evening meal and fellowship time together. Even Mama and Peter joined us for the occasion -- a rare treat to have dear Mama with us for dinner!
Then Amy read some fun and unique "appreciation prophecies" for each one, which we all heartily "amened!" Afterwards, to the surprise of all, Gabe announced that this was also an appreciation night for the entire staff. He proceeded to say a very sweet and special word about each staff member, outlining the various lessons and victories they had won throughout the past year, then presenting them with an "award of accomplishment." It was a beautiful evening of love and appreciation! Just for fun, some of the awards presented were:
-- Accepting, Believing and Receiving Award
-- Flexibility Award
-- People Person Award
-- Learning to be Weak Award
-- Open Heart Award
-- Eager Enthusiast Award
-- Yield and Obey Award
-- Step Out on the Water Award
-- Dependability Award
-- Supportive Award
-- Steadfast, Unmovable and Abounding Award
-- Serving Without Partiality Award
-- Workman of the Word Award
(From Free Zine country:) In the last few months we've had an influx of young new arrivals, bringing up the count of the young people in our Home considerably. Two artists, Spiro (19) and Kristen (19), have come to help with the ever-increasing artwork load, especially now with so many "Spirit Stories" needing illustrations. Check out Zine #7 and Heaven's Library #2 for the first samples of their artwork -- with much more to come. Right now they are in a period of intensive art training with resident artists Jac and Tamar.
Two SGA men, Chris (21) and Theo (22) have also joined the WS computer department and are being a great blessing in the many computer projects in the works.
support-a-missionary
INDIA -- Home of four adults/four kids up for adoption! For $500 (monthly) we can operate in any Indian city! Add: L. Walton P.O. Box 5027 GPO Bangalore - 1 India.
cute kids
* Chris (4) was so excited while coloring the Feast activity pages. His favorite was the Super Power Tower picture, which is in "Inline Praise." Suddenly he turned to me and asked, "Mom, why wasn't Jesus like this when they crucified Him?" "What do you mean, son?" I asked. He answered, "You know, so strong and big! Is He doing weights now?"
* When praying for Mama, Aaron (5) prayed: "Jesus, please bless Mama and her staff. Help it to be strong and not to break. And if it does break, please supply her the money to buy a new one. And supply one for Peter too, so his back and leg won't hurt." -- courtesy of Victory (22), Thailand
feedback
We got our copies of Desiring You and we (little ol' me and the next guy) thought it was COOL! As is sort of the order of the day in our Home, this might lean toward being fashionably late, but we wanted to say a word of thanks for all the FTTs.
Granted (to be just a bit repetitious), every single song may not be to every person's perfect liking, which would result in absolute all-out total and unending monotony (one must be grateful for these little mercies), but hey, anyone who's capable of better has ample support to exercise all that latent talent! -- It's a free world! We, on the other hand (being endowed with none of the above such gifts), are quite happy to be content with what we have. Keep up the good work!
-- Happy ol' Habakkuk and Zany Zerubbabel, India
Dropped Out was very cool. I especially like the songs Vas sings. Also, I really like Sunny's style of singing. It's better than Mariah Carey. I'd like to encourage all of you who work so hard to get the FTTs out. Don't feel bad if some people don't like some songs; I think they are the best! Keep singing for Jesus!
-- Michelle (13, of Gideon and Sarah), ASCRO
Breaking Down the Walls is real cool! The heavier drums and guitar are really where it is at! Keep it coming! It's great to have such a wild praise song like "Flood of Love." And the singing on that one is just "wow"!
-- Ariane (17), ASCRO
Dropped Out is a good tape for getting into a real upbeat mood. My favorite songs are "Irresistible Simplicity," "The Room," etc. Give the DC band a thumbs up and a "you are great!" The FTT Breaking Down the Walls also has some hit songs. Not to mention the groove in those rap style songs which gives a good kick every time it is played.
-- Taiwanese Jo (14), Thailand
The kids love the FTTs! Some of their favorite songs are "Tap into the Power," "Charlie" and "Essence of Life." One of the babies in our Home goes to sleep listening to the song "Hot or Cold," ha! Desiring You is great; we listen to it 25 hours a day!
-- Lilian (13), India
movie ratings
Movies Rated for Senior Teens and Up
DEVIL'S OWN, THE (1997)
Harrison Ford, Brad Pitt
Suspenseful drama about a young member of the Irish Republican Army (IRA) who travels to the US and is accepted into the home of an honest policeman. Has a pro-IRA slant. Beware of some scenes of violence, particularly one in a warehouse.
Movies Rated for Junior Teens and Up
MOLL FLANDERS (1996)
Robin Wright, Morgan Freeman, Stockard Channing
Drama about a young girl struggling to survive on the streets of 18th century London. Inspired by Daniel Defoe's novel by the same name, but retaining very little of the original story. Realistic and sometimes traumatic portrayal of events, but also an inspiring example of overcoming.
Movies Rated for JETTs and Up
JUNIOR (1994)
Arnold Schwartzenegger, Danny DeVito, Emma Thompson
Comedy about two scientists who make a desperate attempt to continue development of a new pregnancy drug -- by experimenting on one of them. Light entertainment only.
Movies Rated for OCs and Up
JUNGLE 2 JUNGLE (1997)
Tim Allen, Sam Huntington
Comedy about a New York stockbroker obsessed with work, who discovers he has a son who has grown up in the Amazon jungle -- and brings him back to the big city. Beware of some native rituals.
Movies Rated for MCs and Up
RICHIE RICH (1994)
Macaulay Culkin, John Larroquette
Comedy about the life and adventures of the richest kid in the world. Light entertainment, with a sweet message.
Movies Rated for YCs and Up
CINDERELLA (1950)
(Animated)
Classic Disney version of the famous fairy tale about the sweet-tempered young girl with a nasty stepmother and stepsisters, who yearns for a chance to attend the prince's ball.
I'm wondering ...
Q: The Charter guarantees the secrecy of a member's communication with the Continental Offices and WS via the published addresses. Does this infer that communications sent via the ABM are to be considered unreliable and interceptable? Or does it imply that messages sent via the ABM will be read and/or judged by third parties? -- Jason, Ukraine
A: No. We trust that the Family ABMs are reliable and are doing their best to handle your messages (incoming and outgoing) intact, and at the earliest possible time. ABMs do not have the authority to tamper with your messages, or to decide to intercept them. However, if you are having problems with not receiving your messages, please explain the problem to your Area Office and Continental Office, who we are sure will do all they can to fix the problem.
Q: Are the Heaven's Children and New Heaven's Children books legal in the Family? If they are, then how come hardly any Homes have them, and they're not included in the HomeARC? -- A. (14), Colombia
A: Yes, both of these books are "legal" (providing that following WS instructions, any pages that should have been purged have been). The reason they were not included on the first HomeARC CD is simply because there wasn't enough time to do so. Good news for Homes who would like to have these books can be found in the WS News section! Check it out!
rumor mill
Q: I heard that Anthony (SGA, of Simon and Naarah Black) returned to France and is now working with our enemies in Paris. Is this true? -- Anonymous, USA
A: No, thank the Lord. Anthony is still in the Family and is currently living in the US. We love you, Anthony!
Q: I read in Grapevine #20 that Gary and Sharon from the GPU went to Peru for their honeymoon and held some teen meetings since they were in the area. Is this true?
A: Ha! No, that is a different Gary and Sharon.
How does "mama's mailbox" work?
-- Compiled questions from you; answers by Teresa and Ashley, Mama's secretaries
Q: Do the staff members in Mama's house read the personal letters we (Family members) write to her and Peter?
A: With the exception of those who help her with the mail, Mama's staff does not read personal mail addressed to Mama or Peter. Mama handles all the mail she receives with the greatest care and confidentiality. We compile the correspondence that comes in for her, and she personally listens to every letter she receives, whether it's sent by "snail" (paper) mail or via her e-mail box.
Because she gets so much mail, she isn't able to respond to every letter, birthday card, picture, testimony or tape that she receives; though she is thankful for every one and considers it a privilege to hear from you and be able to get to know you better. But you can be sure that she prays for each and every one of you that she hears from. -- And she is able to answer quite a few of your letters as well.
Q: Since Mama can't read, because of her eyes, someone probably has to type all handwritten letters for her, so she can listen to them on tape. Is that right?
A: Yes, that's right. Handwritten letters need to be typed, so that Mama can hear them on tape. Check out the "hot tips" at the end of this article, to see how you can ensure that your letter to Mama reaches her via the fastest route possible.
Q: When someone writes Mama a personal letter and she asks someone in her Home to pray and receive a prophecy for that person, does Mama give the person who is going to get the prophecy the letter from the person, or just a brief explanation about the person, their questions and/or situation?
I am interested to know how much information the person receiving the prophecy has about the situation in question. Sometimes we tell a person or group of persons praying about a situation very little and it is amazing what the Lord brings out! We know that person didn't know certain details, so it is very faith-building!
A: When Mama asks one of us on the staff to pray for a certain person, sometimes she will let us read their letter to her, or she'll share excerpts of the letter, or give a summary or brief explanation of the situation, question, or prayer request. If someone asks a specific question, then we'll read that question before we pray and bring it to the Lord; or sometimes Mama will just tell us that "so-and-so is in need of encouragement, because they are battling in a certain area or making a difficult decision," or whatever the case may be.
Reading excerpts of the letter from the person we are praying for gives us the general idea of what to ask the Lord to answer or speak about; but, like you mentioned, the additional counsel and insight that the Lord gives on matters or details that the person writing didn't specifically mention in their letter (or that the person praying didn't know was in the letter) is amazing and wonderfully inspiring. Mama receives numerous responses from those who receive a personal letter and/or prophecies from her, with beautiful testimonies of how the Words the Lord gave were just what they needed, even though they may not have expressed that particular need or question in their letter to Mama.
Q: With Mama's e-mail address, can we send regular mail or does it still have to be coded?
A: Mail sent to Mama's e-mail address should be coded with the Mama CPY key that was sent out with the HomeARC CD. This is important because whatever you send through the Internet can be intercepted and read by anyone in the world with access to the Internet and some technical know-how. Keep your communications secure!
Additional note: Several people have commented that they have shied away from writing Mama over the years, because once they sat down to begin their letter, they felt that their opening paragraph was inadequate. Perhaps it didn't quite express their love or gratitude as fully as they would have liked. Mama understands how beginning a letter can be the most difficult part (it is for her, too!). She would like to assure you that you don't need to be too concerned about your introductory or closing paragraphs. Mama knows that you love her, and she loves to hear from you! She would rather that you simply write her about what is on your heart, than take a lot of time trying to get the opening and closing paragraphs just right, to the point that you decide not to write or find it a struggle to do so.
HOT TIPS:
-- The quickest and surest way to send a personal note to Mama is via modem or e-mail (mpg@ibm.net). -- And of course, the shorter the better. It's much easier for Mama to find the time to listen to a short letter than it is for her to find a big chunk of time to listen to a lengthy one; but of course if you feel you need to write a long letter she wants you to feel free to do so.
-- If you don't have a computer or modem, then the second best way is to type your letter. This way it can be scanned and put on tape for Mama, and won't have to get typed up first, which of course delays the process and means more work for us!
-- Personal tapes that you send to Mama either need to be transcribed by your CRO office and modemed to us, or they get forwarded to us via mail, which can take months to reach us. So again, your message will get to Mama much quicker if you either modem or type your personal messages. -- Plus, it means less work for a busy secretary, who I can personally assure you will appreciate your efforts!! (If you can't type your letter on a typewriter or computer, it will reach Mama faster if you write it by hand and mail it, than if you dictate a tape.)
-- If you are sending your letter via the Internet, encrypt your e-mail file with the "Mama" CPY key sent out with the HomeARC CD, to ensure security and privacy.
letters to the editor
My apologies to "Disheartened" and any other teens who may have been offended by my comments in Grapevine #7. I'm the "adult male" from Switzerland who suggested that some of our kids have become "dead weight" in the Family.
One thing this girl said (see Grapevine #12) that I feel deserves a response is a point she made about some adults not understanding teens. That's true. I'm one adult who doesn't understand teens very well, and never has. -- I didn't understand 'em when I was a teen! I was never seriously tempted with the "normal" kind of teen behavior which has become commonplace in the world today, and which seems to be a big attraction for teens in the Family.
We were far from being the kind of role models that I would want any of our kids to follow. But amongst my friends it wasn't cool to get into mischief, to be lazy, to have parents that let you do what you pleased, to go ga-ga over movie stars or rock-and-roll singers, or to sit around all day yakking about nothing. I still don't see what's so cool about being "cool." I left the Family nine months after I joined because I didn't have a "testimony," and I was determined to get one. I went out to see what I'd been missing -- and I found it! Only it took me 10 years to get back to the Family.
Maybe this should give me more tolerance for some of the things our kids are going through, but I don't feel sorry for them for what they're being asked to "endure" in the Family -- especially when I see what System kids have to endure. I'm tired of being asked to look at the downside of their potential, because I don't think it does them or us a bit of good. It's what the System does with their kids: "Let'm enjoy life! Let'm sow their wild oats! Let'm wait till they're 25 or 30 to grow up!"
In my present Home, five teens, YAs and SGAs have left the Family this past year. It was their right and I'm not saying they should've stayed. I just wish they would have left sooner, because while we were making up our minds about how far we could let them go, they were wreaking havoc in the Home. Some of their younger brothers and sisters were not strong enough to take it and they are still recovering from it. That's what I'm talking about when I say "dead weight." Maybe there's a more charitable way to say that, I don't know. -- Misplaced inertia?
I'm sorry to come on so hard, because I really like the teens. They're usually pretty straight with you and you can be straight with them. It doesn't take them half an hour of hemming and hawing at a Home Council meeting to make their point. When they can get a word in edgewise, they make as much sense as the adults do. They're not offended as easily as adults seem to be; they're not as sensitive, because many of them had teen shepherds who were straight with them -- unlike a lot of us adults who fall to pieces at the least little suggestion that we're out of it or that we're wasting time.
I think we have a lot more in common, in spite of our differences, than any other group of adults and teens in the world. We adults feel young, at least, and you younger folks have the advantage of knowing where your parents are coming from -- which is something, believe me, we never had with our parents. I think it's great that we learn from each other, hopefully without hurting each other.
-- Philip (of Angela), Switzerland
In Grapevine #13 someone suggested one way to lose weight -- by jogging. I know of a few girls who have developed womb complications due to jogging. I'm sure a little is fine, but someone might read that tip and overdo it.
-- YA, Japan
I was touched that someone wrote in a sweet thanks and nice comment about our Home (Grapevine #15). When someone shows a bit of appreciation, it makes you feel appreciated! It would be nice to see more in the way of uplifting comments about others in the Grapevine.
-- Home in Hungary
Answers for Kenya
Hi, Paul in Kenya! I just read your comments in Grapevine #17, "Cool Talk." You're right, you did strike a hot one there! Just to clear up one little thing, just because people write like that doesn't necessarily mean they talk like that! I don't know of anyone who says, "Yo, dude, send down the salt shaker." You're right, it would be corny. But I think using contemporary terms in our new pubs have spiced them up and made them more fun and interesting to read! Ask the teens, YAs and SGAs that live at your Home if they like it. Most likely they'll say it's a welcome change!
And yes, the Family's stand against being cool (as in worldly) is still in effect. I think the new tracts coming out using "cool talk" (given in prophecy), as well as some prophecies aimed at our JETTs and teens, are great!
I don't think our younger generation is going to be talking like this within a year. To borrow your own example, look at your young black friend who just visited. He probably hears a lot of "cool talk," but he still didn't talk that way. Maybe it just wasn't his style. You'll notice it's not my style either, but that doesn't mean I disapprove. I love you lots!
-- Joy Rose (21, of Andrew), Mexico
Sometimes there just isn't any other word to describe what you feel except "cool" or "awesome." It's okay to use these words every once in a while. -- After all, it's a new day, right?! It's not the words we use, but the spirit in which we speak them. Please, let's not go to the extreme and use those words for every situation; that's not the idea either, and certainly not what we are trying to advertise to our younger brothers and sisters. We all want our siblings to grow up speaking good English. Isn't that what we go to school for?! So use moderation and have a good time adding to your vocabulary. Use your imagination (and your dictionary)!
Gotta go now! Stay "in the house" in order to keep away from the "ultra violet" rays! Ha!
-- teens and YAs in Tampa, USA
Being a young person, I think these new expressions and colorful phrases make the new pubs more interesting and fun. To spice up writing, you have to use crazier words than what you'd use when normally talking. If it sounds a lil' corky (corny + quirky), well, that's the way we like it! It makes us sit up and take notice. I seriously doubt that WS is making an effort to have us all speaking Ebonics (Black English) within a year. I think the idea behind this new lingo is to be different and radical, but to get the point across in a fun way.
To everything there is a season, right? If we young folks do pick up some of this style, we should be intelligent enough to know when to shout out an occasional, "Hey, Dude! Wuz up?" and when to keep our language to what we have come to be known for by academics who have studied our young people -- intelligent and articulate.
-- Al' (16), Japan
PS from Jay ("weird Al's" ancient, fossilized Dad sending his daughter's e-mail for her): I agree with Alisa (uh, I mean Al) when she says the above. After all, when I joined the Family 25 years ago the Family spoke my language: "Wow! Heavy verse, man! Right on! Here's one in this chapter that will blow your mind!" So why shouldn't we speak the language of the young today? Of course, we always need to make sure we are training our children to be able to "be all things to all men," which would include having the wisdom to know when to use refined (and politically correct) language and manners.
As far as our internal communications and pubs aimed at our youth, I say, loosen up bro', and a thunderous round of applause to the editors of the 'Vine and the Zine! By and large, Family pubs are written in a good contemporary literary style that is intelligent and educational, with proportionally very little street talk. Dad always spiced up his writings, though, with slang and language that the common person could relate to. I think our current pubs are keeping a good balance. As far as I'm concerned, as long as the salt has not lost its zip you can "please pass it," "send it on down," "shoot it over" or anything you want!
-- Jay, in a tiny DO Home in Japan
Paul's observations were well presented and made a lot of sense, leaving us with some good food for thought. I agree that the Zine uses lingo that really isn't the norm by today's young people's standards. As this brother pointed out, it is actually those of lower stratas that talk like that. Being in a city where there are a lot of gangs and kids of this sort, I wouldn't want our young people to get the wrong signal or impression that it is "cool and all right" to imitate these sort of kids. It may even be a bit confusing, especially to our OCs and JETTs. Recently in our Home, some not-so-suitable articles were read to our MC's and OC's from the Zine, so one would hope that the parents in each Home would monitor things like this.
-- J. (adult woman), USA
There does seem to be an overuse of what some people consider hip language, but from what I read, it doesn't seem to be from the States. It seems the Family overseas has the impression that everyone in the US speaks that way. The reality is if you are from the South, you speak like a southerner; if you're from the New England area, you speak as everyone does there. If you grew up in the ghetto, it would only be natural to speak the way they do. All that to say, you've got to keep it real. Don't try to be something you're not.
-- Nate, USA
ask-a-midwife
(From Jenna:) Now is your chance to ask that question you've been keeping in the back of your mind for such a long time! -- For all those questions about nutrition when pregnant, baby care, pregnancy, labor, breathing techniques, and old wives' tales you've heard ... this is the moment you've been waiting for!
One of our dedicated Family midwives, Rose, has agreed to author this new column for us. In the interest of keeping Rose available for the many bundles of love that keep her busy flying around the US to deliver, we'll keep this column to a question-and-answer column only. In other words, you write in your questions and she'll answer them. -- And perhaps she'll even throw in some interesting facts and tidbits for all!
But just to avoid questions already answered in the pubs, before writing in your questions, be sure to check out the latest FSM (#313) on this topic (Nutrition in Pregnancy), which contains a great deal of helpful counsel from Rose and others. We're looking forward to hearing from you!
new idea from you!
Would it be possible to note in the "tidbits" section when teens/YAs rejoin the Family? While news of who leaves spreads rapidly through the (unprinted) grapevine, the news of folks who return is often hazy and unclear -- if you hear anything at all. I think it would be encouraging for all!
-- Lily Fighter (21), Nepal
(From the Editors:) We think that's a great idea! We'd love to do it -- but we need your help! Did any new disciples join your Home lately? Any TS returnees? Are any young (or older!) people rejoining? Please send in this inspiring news to the Grapevine, via e-mail or "snail" mail. -- And we'll print it!
ladies and gents
Coping with polygamy!
Have you ever wondered what it's like being engaged to 20 girls, ranging from the sweet-and-girlish to the pouting-toddler-type, from the mature-and-objective to the flirtatious-carefree type, from those with tempers to sensitive, tearful ones, from the independent to the clingy type?
The wonder/horror (however you'd like to see it) is that all these personalities are encased in one very human self -- in this case, me. I never really appreciated or understood all that went into loving someone with that many sides to their personalities, till I met my other half! Aside from Jesus, the perfect and immortal, yet ever so human and personable, Lover, I must say that I really admire my sweet and faithful Daniel. He's been an angel -- and a chocolate one at that! It didn't matter what exactly I was or did -- or wasn't or didn't do -- he was still the same fantastic lover and friend. There were rough times, but his love and understanding glossed them over and smoothed them out.
He's gentle when I'm sensitive, kindly reprimands me when I get off beat, holds me when I'm afraid, winks at my "extra" friendships and fiascoes, speaks softly when I lose my temper, doesn't nag, stays calm when I freak out, supports my aspirations (both realistic and overly ambitious) -- and last but not least -- joins right in when I'm feeling sexy! To put it in a nutshell, we're best friends and lovers! I don't think I'll ever get just how he copes with all my moods (or shall we call them "personalities"?), but there's an ocean of love in his heart, and I wanna spend the rest of my life swimming in it! -- And returning as much as I can, of course!
I love you, Daniel! Jesus and you are the two coolest, most perfect lovers for me!
-- Mariko (20), Thailand
Gents caught in action!
-- girls talkin' about guys
You wouldn't believe what a gentleman this guy is! He literally is like a "king" and treats me like a "queen." He pulls the chair out for me to sit down, helps me in and out of vehicles, opens doors for me, helps me put my coat on and off, helps me with heavy loads, etc. What a dream! And he's so sensitive to my feelings, it's almost unbelievable! He almost knows what I'm thinking and we've found ourselves sometimes saying the same thing at the exact same time. It's so uncanny! Being the sensitive soul that I am, it's won my heart to know that he's not going to yell at me or put me down if I do something stupid. He shows a deep respect for me and my ideas.
-- R. (adult woman), North America
A young SGA couple and their kids came to visit our Home. We had a Family dinner together, and after eating we were just chatting. Out of the blue, the young man came over, started rubbing my shoulders, and said that I was such a good mother and that my kids were so sweet. He gave me a hug while standing behind my chair. That was it, but my, it was the best thing that had happened to me for such a long time! My kids are rascals, and they're regularly the subject of childcare meetings. Being a parent is just plain hard work, but those sweet words of encouragement are something I'll never forget. It felt so good that I just cried, and it makes me cry again writing this.
-- an adult woman, Europe
When passing through Thailand, I experienced something beautiful: a YA who was so loving and caring, not only to those most lovable, but especially to those withdrawn and more insecure. He seemed to sense their need for love, and often, by his sweet manner, seemed to help them come out of themselves. He was very loving in an unselfish way, which touched me. He's a true gentleman, very helpful, and seems to sense who needs help or encouragement. When all others see a smile, he seems to see the secret tears. -- He saw mine. He always looks happy -- probably his reward for making others happy. Thank God for you, John P. Keep it up. You have no idea how far your love has gone.
-- Someone who is thankful for the Lord's love in you
gents and ladies
she said: An attitude that bothers me is when a guy takes everything as a come-on. It's hard to even show simple affection without some guys thinking I'm in love with them. I'm quite affectionate with others -- young or old -- but often I've been labeled as flirty or teased about having many boyfriends. Because of this, I'm afraid to give hugs or lay my hand on someone's shoulder, etc., much less ask anyone for a date!
It's also nice when guys are nice to everyone, not just their mate or girlfriend or just the girls that they think are pretty and popular. Being single myself, I appreciate compliments -- honest, not flattery -- (and I know other girls feel the same) on my looks, or appreciation for what I do around the house. -- Little signs that they notice I exist. "A little bit of love goes such a long way."
-- a female, Europe
she said: The male species -- a big topic! Guys are wonderful creatures! What we personally look for in a guy is honesty, consideration and humility. Also fun -- mainly someone we feel comfortable with and someone we don't have to try to put on some sort of false image or appearance for; good looks also help sometimes. Now maybe that's a tall order, but we're sure that we have some of those guys around. Don't we?
-- A. (18) and M. (16), females, South America
he said: I think young guys need to learn a few complimentary phrases like, "I think you are attractive! I think you are beautiful! I think you have pretty eyes!" Words are real things, and I believe these kind of words would make our young (and old) women feel loved and appreciated.
I think our young women need to learn to encourage such comments by reacting with, "Thank You Jesus! I'm glad you think so! That's so encouraging! Thank you for telling me that!" Rather than replying, "I'm so fat! I have big hips! I have small breasts!" or whatever other parts of their body they are unhappy with.
-- anonymous male (young in spirit)
he said: Some girls stereotype all boys as sex-mongers, which is not accurate. Boys, like girls, are individuals, and as such have individual needs, emotions, likes and dislikes. A big need a lot of us guys have is just for friendship, companionship and understanding. Sometimes there's a girl who I'd like to get to know or just fellowship with. (It's not that I'm trying to jump in bed with her, although, hey, who knows, in time that may be a possibility too.) But say I'd just like to go for a walk with her or whatever. (For some girls the prospect of going for a walk with someone is much more freaky than if the same person had asked them for a date.)
On a number of occasions I've heard girls comment to each other or even to boys, "Yep, girls like love and affection, but boys just want sex." While few people will deny that in general boys are into sex, the key phrase here is "in general," as I've met some girls whose interest in this field far surpasses that of many of us boys. But sometimes it hurts to feel pre-judged or stereotyped by members of the opposite sex before they even know you, and it greatly reduces the opportunity for good friendship and understanding. So just as us guys need to be aware of the girls' needs and feelings, remember we have feelings too.
-- Toby (22), Free Zine country
someone said: It seems that a lot of us are jumping on the bandwagon with our opinions of guys in the Family being irresponsible, not gentlemanly, and basically immature. I wonder if it's encouraging them to do better, or just putting a label on them? Like the saying goes, "Give a dog a bad name and you might as well hang him. But give him a good name and see what happens!" I know a lot of guys could do better, but if we would look more at the positive things, I think we would all be much happier!
-- sorry, not a clue!
thanking ...
From the "Heaven's Library" editors:) Tommy French, Mariko, Marie, Praise, Peace, Tina, Michael Anthony (Thailand), Peter Picture and Esther, Anaik and Amie (Japan), Christina and Chris (Ukraine) for the spirit stories you sent in! They're wonderful! Keep 'em coming!
fruitful fields
India -- (From ASCRO:) If you're interested in coming to India and have the "How do I go about getting a visa?" question, here are a few points in brief:
* Tourist Visa: These are impossible to renew. So unless you're only coming for six months, read on!
* Student visas: These are easy to extend and relatively easy to get. We advise these visas for young people, as it looks fairly normal. However, you have to be prepared to study a bit in order to stay on these visas. This requires a few hours weekly, or attending a couple of classes a week.
* Business visas: Many folks have come into India on these visas. Some found it very easy and others found it difficult. In some countries the Indian embassy is more lenient than in others. Once you're in India on this type of visa, renewing your visa requires proper documentation and proof of business.
Once in India you can counsel with the Indian ABMs as to how to proceed further with your visa renewal. All things are possible! India is calling! We need you! (For more details, please write ASCRO, who will send you an India information pack.)
Russia -- (From Russian ABM team:) To those interested in SWIFTing in Russia for the summer:
You will still need to find a Home before we can begin processing your visa. The first step is to send us your want ad so we can send it to the local Homes.
You will need a round trip ticket and anywhere from $300-900 (per adult) to travel from Moscow to the city your host Home is in (travel inside Russia is getting more expensive!). (Once you know where you are going, we can give you a figure; Russia spans over eight time zones-- a third of the world!)
If you can bring a minimum of $100 per month for the time you wish to be in Russia, it would be a real blessing.
Our e-mail address is: chip03glasnet.ru.
open forum
-- Law of Love
I've heard YA and SGA couples comment how they are "being loyal" to their mates, saying how they haven't been with anyone else in so many months, or whatever. Or I hear single young people say, "When I get married, I'm gonna be really loyal to my wife/husband."
That sounds like the way people in the System look at marriage and sex, and it seems contrary to the Word and the Law of Love. Am I wrong? Peter said that the Law of Love should not only govern the sexual aspects of our lives, but every area of our lives -- but he also said that it does and should govern the sexual aspect, too.
Hearing these types of comments from my peers makes me (a single) feel "guilty" to share with someone who has a mate. It gives the impression that the Law of Love (in the sexual aspect) ends when you get married -- that it's only applicable for singles. I believe if sharing is done according to the Law of Love, with all parties consenting, it can be a beautiful thing, as I have experienced before.
-- single female YA, Japan
I've noticed that some of our YAs and senior teens have a mistaken idea that in order to share sexually and show love to others (regardless of how far they want to go), that they need to be romantically attracted to the person. This is sad, and because of this attitude there is very little sharing going on.
When sharing was first introduced into the Family, it was viewed as a sacrificial way of loving your brothers and sisters. We knew that we were all responsible to make sure that the needs of all were met. If you only share with the ones that you feel attracted to, it doesn't seem very sacrificial to me, but rather selfish. Some of our young people seem to be very choosy about who they share their love with.
The "Go for the Gold" GN and the "Loving Jesus" revelation about "being Jesus to one another" should now take away any excuses for saying: "This person doesn't appeal to me," or "I don't feel romantically attracted to so-and-so."
This attitude seems to go against the spirit of the Family; that of showing love impartially and making sure all feel loved and needed.
-- an adult woman, USA
Hot topic, huh?! Well, since it is a "new day" of love, would anyone like to share some personal experiences, thoughts or tips on the "sharing" subject? Here are a couple ideas of discussion topics, and, hey, feel free to add your own!
-- If stepping out to share with others is (or was) hard for you, what gives (or gave) you the faith to take the first step?
-- What does it take to be able to happily continue to meet the needs of those you don't have a mutual attraction to?
-- What benefits or blessings have you received in sharing with others -- even in instances where you might not have been so attracted to them?
-- What should "being loyal to your mate" mean in the Family?
-- How can we ensure that everyone's needs for love, companionship and affection are met? What's your part?
-- What do you consider to be the main obstacles to more loving sharing in our Homes?
Special CD Offer!
USA
(From the DC Home:) Isn't the variety of music that has been coming out via the FTTs great? We've discovered many common "favorites" which young people put onto their compilation tapes. So we decided to make our Home's local project of compiling the most-listened-to songs onto two CDs (one fast/one slow) available at the cost of the CDs and shipping.
Lord willing, more compilations like these will be available in the not-so-distant future; also a CD of the Dropped Out--DC Band Live! with cover and songbook, coming soon! These CDs are being offered on a "first come, first serve" basis (till July 15th), so get your order in as soon as possible! Send your order by mail, including the following information:
* Your full mailing address.
* A check or postal money order made out to The DC Family, covering the cost of the CDs and shipping/packaging.
* If you send cash, send US dollars, and do so at your own risk.
Fast/Slow Set (2 CDs; sold as a set only!) = $10 + shipping costs:
* $1.75 First Class
* $3.50 Priority Mail
* $4.00 International
Send your orders to:
CD Project
5223 Wisconsin Ave. N.W. Suite 170
Washington, DC 20015
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Copyright (c) 1998 by The Family