DFO GN40: PERSONAL LETTERS!--No.2
12/94
--Letters to Mama and Her Replies!
INTRO FROM MAMA!
Dear Family,
9/94
1. HERE are some more personal answers which we would like to share with you. As we've said before, we wish we had the time to answer each one of you by name in a very individual way, but please be assured that we do read each of your letters to us, and we pray for you. When you bring up questions or problems, we often discuss these with your leadership, prayerfully trying to decide what we can do to make things easier for you and all the other members of our precious Family who may be encountering similar difficulties. So if you don't get a personal letter from us addressing your specific question or problem, don't despair. Please know that we are praying for you and are trying to do everything we can to help you.
2. Some day soon, you may be reading a Letter from Dad or me in a GN and find some words from the Lord that will be exactly what you need, or the key to your situation, something that will answer your questions and help resolve the problems.--Something from the Lord that you will see as His loving answer to your need! Even though you may not find your name in print, you will know that the Lord and we are doing our best to love you and care for you and attend to your needs.
3. It's like reading the Bible--God's love letters to us!--It may not be directed by name to us, but when reading it, we have no doubt that He is speaking right to us. And those precious words jump out at us and comfort us and edify us and instruct us and inspire us, and we know He is speaking to us personally.
4. So please be assured that you're each very precious to the Lord--as well as to me--and we want to do all we can to make you happy and fruitful. So do your part--what you can--and we know that the Lord will do what you can't, and will also help us to do what we can.
Love, Mama
LETTER TO JOSEPH WILLING!
5. (Joseph Willing [formerly Willing] is the father of Mark Elder [see DFO GN 39]. Joseph joined the Family in 1971 at 19 years of age and then left from 1982 to 1986, rejoining during the Searcher meetings in the States. Joseph is the one who first said, "The Family at its worst is better than the System at its best!" Joseph's wife and her new mate and Joseph's five children also rejoined at the same time. His wife and her new mate and their two youngest children later left, which caused great heartache to Joseph, but he determined to continue serving the Lord in Latin America with his three older sons who he was very close to. Then one of Joseph's sons left the Family, which broke his heart.
6. (Joseph felt called to Eastern Europe, and his departure from Latin America meant that he left behind a Latin sister whom he had grown very close to, as well as his two remaining teen sons. While in Europe he heard the news that these two had also left the Family.
7. (At the time that he received this sad news, due to his personal problems, Joseph had just been relieved of all responsibilities and began working in the kitchen fulltime, and was later asked to go to an RTC Home. Joseph's time in Europe was filled with intense spiritual, physical and emotional battles, which he said "lasted every day for the entire two years I was there!" Spiritually, he was barraged by negative thoughts and pictures daily. Physically, he battled back pain and other difficulties. Emotionally, he was overwhelmed with heartache over the losses of his family and loved ones.
8. (The wonderful conclusion to all this is that he has come through the "deep waters" without being drowned, and that he is now back to normal spiritually, the Lord has healed his back and the other physical problems, and he is again a happy and productive disciple. Though happy and challenged, Joseph has asked for prayer because the Enemy really attacks him a lot with the feeling, "I must have failed my own kids in some way for them all to be out of the Family.")
From Mama, 31/7/94:
Dear Joseph,
9. Thank you for writing and sharing your heart with us. Isn't it wonderful to know, Joseph, that no matter how heavy our sorrow or how deep our heartache, Jesus knows all about it and He understands. It's just wonderful to know that Someone not only cares, but can understand what we've gone through and can feel the hurt and the heartache.--And not only feel it, but do something about it. He can reach down and heal and renew and strengthen.
10. One of my favorite songs which I liked to play over and over on the piano when I was a young teen was "Does Jesus Care?" My biggest heartbreak at that time was what many teens go through: being emotionally attracted to someone who didn't return the feelings. But taking my heartache to Jesus made things so much better. I guess even that long ago the Lord was helping me to receive the comfort that I could later pass on to others.
Does Jesus care when my heart is pained
Too deeply for mirth or song;
As the burdens press and the cares distress,
And the way grows weary and long.
Does Jesus care when my way is dark
With a nameless dread and fear?
As the daylight fades into deep night shades
Does He care enough to be near?
Does Jesus care when I've tried and failed
To resist some temptation strong;
When for my deep grief I find no relief,
Tho' my tears flow all the night long?
Does Jesus care when I've said "good-bye"
To the dearest on Earth to me,
And my sad heart aches
Till it nearly breaks--
Is this aught to Him? Does He see?
(Chorus:)
Oh yes, He cares; I know He cares,
His heart is touched with my grief;
When the days are weary,
The long nights dreary,
I know my Savior cares.
11. I can't tell you that I completely understand, Joseph, but I can point you to One who I know does. My heart aches for you, but I know that the closer you draw to Jesus, the lighter the load will be.
There's never a care or burden,
There's never a grief or loss,
But that Jesus in love will lighten
When carried to the cross.
Wonderful, wonderful Jesus.
In my heart He implanteth a song.
A song of deliverance, of courage, of strength,
In my heart He implanteth a song.
12. I was thinking about writing this letter to you and I was praying about what I should say, and the Lord reminded me of our "When You Need Him Most" tape. This is a tape that I hope you have your own personal copy of and are able to listen to frequently. I personally chose each of the songs on this tape, most of which I had known for years, since I was a child, having sung them in church or heard my parents or gospel quartets sing. All the songs on this tape are very dear and special to me, and I knew that if I could get them into the hands of our precious Family they would be a very great strength and encouragement to them in times of trouble. Wasn't that a wonderful title that the Lord gave us for the tape?--"When You Need Him Most."
Fear not the testing,
'Tis to make you stronger,
That not in self,
But in Christ your soul shall boast.
He will not leave you,
Rest now on His promise,
For He is nearest when you need Him most.
13. I don't think there is anything I could say that could be of more comfort to you than to point you to the beautiful Bible-based words of this tape, which were composed by those going through deep waters, tragedy and heartache, but who looked to Jesus for their deliverance and were not disappointed.
14. After writing the first paragraph of this letter to you, I stopped and got my tape and listened to the words of the songs and cried through the whole thing!--Thinking about you and how these songs would be just the answer for you--the comforting voice of the Lord in each one, lovingly encouraging you to cast your care upon Him and He will sustain you.
15. I pray that these words will sink deeply into your heart, that you will memorize them; and that even when you don't have this tape, these words will run through your mind and be a comfort to you and cause you to:
Lean hard on Him, O tested soul.
On Him your cares and troubles roll.
Our God still hears and has control.
He will not fail you now.
* * *
Whenever I am tempted,
Whenever clouds arise.
When songs give place to sighing,
When hope within me dies.
I draw the closer to Him,
From fears He sets me free.
For His eye is on the sparrow
And I know He watches me.
16. Joseph, we probably don't have to tell you all of this, because if you hadn't known how to hold on to the Lord for dear life, you wouldn't have made it. You certainly have gone through deep waters that have almost overwhelmed you, and through the raging fires which have almost devoured you. You have been through the hell of the System, and experienced deep disappointment with some Family members who may have been unwise and unloving. You've battled long and hard the very vicious attacks of doubt and discouragement that the Enemy tried to destroy you with. You've gone through difficult and painful physical afflictions. You've known great heartbreak over the loss of a wife and five precious children to the System. You've battled condemnation. You've wrestled against the temptation to become bitter. You've experienced continual discouragement over NWOs.
17. You've endured all these things, but like Job you've said, "Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him!"--And you hung on!--And you made it! I suppose that often you couldn't even see how "all these things were working together for your good," and you couldn't see how He was "doing all things well!" (Rom.8:28; Mk. 7:37).--You couldn't see!--But you believed that somehow, some time, in some way everything was going to work out all right. It's almost impossible to see it when you're going through it, the price is so great. But when we remember that we could never pay as great a price as Jesus did, and that these sufferings are only for a little time, and then we'll reap rewards forever for our sacrifices, it makes it easier to bear.
18. We can see why the Devil has been fighting you so furiously. You are engaged in a great job for Jesus, one of the most important--teaching our young people, training our babes and rescuing souls from the Devil's clutches. If you thought you were just a "nobody," forget that notion. You are special to the Lord, precious in His sight, and He needs you desperately. He needs you free of your fears, your condemnation, your bitterness. He wants to free you from the things that keep you bound so that you can serve Him with joy. "And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free" (John 8:32), so that you can say, "He brought me up out of the miry clay and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings, and put a new song in my mouth" (Psalm 40:1-3).
19. You may be asking yourself, "How can Mama be writing me?--She doesn't even know me or what my problems are. After all, I almost got kicked out of the Family." It may be news to you--and to many others--that we don't decide who we write by how good they are or how few problems they have!--We judge by the need and how the Lord burdens us to respond to it. Like that old song goes, "He looked beyond my fault and saw my need."
20. Who did the Good Shepherd show special concern for?--Wasn't it the little lost sheep that strayed and got lost in the brambles on the mountain? Thank God we don't have to be perfect to receive the Lord's comfort and love. Like the father of the prodigal son, the Lord rejoices over the lost one more than the ones safe at home. He thrills at the rescue of the one lost lamb more than the 99 left in the fold.
21. "How think ye? If a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray? And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in Heaven, that one of these little ones should perish" (Mat.18:12,13; Luke 15:4-7).
22. Perhaps from a very self-righteous man you have become the humble sinner that He can use, a broken man that He can work through, and now a comforted man who can "comfort others with the comfort wherewith you are comforted" (2Cor.1:4).
23. I'm writing this letter on my birthday, July 31st, and at this moment our Home members are gathered together to ask the Lord, upon my request, for some specific words of encouragement for you. I asked them to do this as their birthday present to me, and they wholeheartedly agreed. They were planning to hear from the Lord for me, but I've had so much wonderful encouragement that I wanted to give someone else a chance, and you were the one that the Lord especially laid on our hearts. I'm asking the Lord to use these special words from Him to turn your mourning into joy, to take away your spirit of heaviness and dispel the clouds of confusion that have descended upon you to try to destroy your usefulness.
Much love and prayers, Mama
24. P.S. Following are the words of comfort which the Lord gave through our Family members when they prayed for you:
Prophecies:
25. As it was with Job, so has it been with thee. I have chosen thee in the furnace of affliction, and I have taken all that thou hast, and yet thou hast not denied My name nor turned back from serving Me, and thou hast become a testimony to many. And thou shalt yet be an encouragement and an inspiration and a vision to many, that though the battles are strong and the Devil fights hard, I will be with him that looks to Me in his hour of need, and I will carry him through. I will bring thee--and all of My dear children--through the battles that are ahead. Fret not for thy children, for they are My children and I have control and I will lead them in the way that they shall go.--And thou shalt see them again and thou shalt rejoice. Keep thine eyes on Me, for thou hast done well, and thou hast kept thine heart with all diligence.
* * *
26. I am the Lord and I do all things well. I know thy heart and I know thou hast thine heart turned toward Me. I have heard thy prayers, and I will be with your little ones and your big ones. But put them completely in My care, trust thou in Me that I will care for them. I am working in their lives, I do all things well. I will restore them unto their place of service to Me. But continue to have faith in Me that I will care for them. Thou hast been an ensample of My love and trust and dedication to many others. I will bless thee for this. Thou hast forsaken much and I count this as an honor to thee.
27. But concerning thy sons, put them fully in My care and entrust them to Me. I will care for them, I will be with them, I will teach and train them. I will teach them the things they have to learn. Leave them now totally in My care, and continue on in thy service for Me. For I will bless thee and keep thee and help thee in every way. I love thee, My faithful one, who loves Me so. I know thy heart and I know it is broken. For I have heard thy prayers, I have seen thy tears, and behold, I will heal thee.
* * *
28. No greater love hath any man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. Blessed is this one who hath laid down his life for the lives of the little ones of others, even though he feels defeated and as nothing in his own sight. I will lift him up, I will raise him and lift his heart and lift his spirit unto Me. He has cast his bread upon the waters and he shall find it after many days.
* * *
29. Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience; but let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. For behold, Satan hath desired to have thee that he may sift thee as wheat; but I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not; and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren. That the trial of your faith being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honor and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ. Be thou faithful unto death and I will give thee a crown of life.
* * *
30. Think it not strange concerning this fiery trial which hath tried thee, as though some strange thing happened unto thee. But rejoice, inasmuch as thou art a partaker of Christ's suffering, that when His glory shall be revealed, thou shalt be glad also with exceeding joy. For these manifold temptations came not to stay, but they came to pass, and every wrong will be made right again.
31. Thou art wise to hold on, for I will bless thee and I will restore everything unto thee many fold. For if thou shalt continue to serve Me with thy whole heart, thy children shall be blessed; for if one parent serves Me, the children are blessed wherever they are. And even though thy sons are sojourning in a dry land, I will feed them and I will keep them, and at the time appointed I will bring them back in full service. Therefore trust in Me and follow Me and I will help thee and keep thee and uphold thee with the right hand of My righteousness. I will encourage thee, I will wipe away all sorrow and all tears and discouragement and attacks of the Enemy. If thou shalt draw nigh unto Me, I will draw nigh unto thee. For it is in Me that thou shalt overcome the attacks of the Enemy.
* * *
32. I love thee, my precious one, on bended knee to Me, looking unto Me. Thou shalt be as one who looked unto Him and was lightened. I shall be thy sun and thy shield and thy buckler and I will defeat the Enemy for thee. I have defeated the Enemy for thee. But in all thy battles continue to look steadfastly unto Me and I will bless thee, I will give thee victory. Continue to look into My face and I will strengthen thee and help thee and answer thy every prayer.
* * *
33. Come unto Me, thou who art weary and heavy laden, and I will give thee rest. Take My yoke upon thee and learn of Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and thou shalt find rest unto thy soul. I shall wipe all tears away from thine eyes and soothe thy broken heart and give thee peace of mind that passeth all understanding in just one moment. Trust in Me, keep thy confidence, keep thy heart with all diligence. There hath not one thing been promised by Me that shall not come to pass. Hold on one step at a time.
34. For I am greatly pleased with thy precious gifts of service and sacrifice--thy children, thy life, thy everything that thou hast given to Me. I will not withhold one thing from thee that thou desirest. I will give thee joy unspeakable and treasures of heart and mind that others cannot understand, because these have been reserved for thee. Thou hast given much unto Me, and I will return 100-fold in this life. Keep close to Me. Thou art My very faithful one in whom I delight.
* * *
35. (Peter:) Behold the strength of the arm that holds the hammer that hits the anvil, and with what fury it smashes down upon the heated metal that layeth upon the anvil.--And how it beats and beats and beats again, and then throws it once again in the burning furnace. And again and again it beats and hits and smashes, and heats again and casts into the water to cool. And then again it heats and then again it bangs, and with real strength and almost anger.--But yet it is not in anger, for it is to fashion the metal into the vessel that I would make it.
36. The metal cannot tell the end result, it only feels the beating and the heat and the cold and the beating again. It does not see the way it is being formed, and the thing of beauty that I am making it into. It only feels the pain and the crushing and the blows and the heat and the cold. It does not see the end result.
37. But I am the Blacksmith, I am the one who is forming and molding it into the useful tool which I will make thee into. It is not for the metal to question or to worry or to doubt. It must know that the Blacksmith is in control and knows exactly what He is doing.--That each thrust of the hammer is measured, every amount of time in the heat is measured, every thrust into the cold water is measured, because I am bending and molding and making thee into a vessel for My use.
38. Therefore be not afraid, for thou knowest not the beauty that thou shalt have. And these things do not weaken the metal, but they strengthen it and they form it into the tool that I make it.--Into a strong tool. For it is no longer just brittle metal, but it is metal that is molded into the shape I desire. And although it is painful and it is long and it hurts, yet in the end thou shalt know and thou shalt be strong and be useful and thou shalt be of benefit to others.
39. Therefore fear not, for thou art in the Master's hand, and I am molding thee and shaping thee for the purpose that I have for thee. Your part is to hold on, to trust in utter faith that I know what I am doing. I shall bring thee forth to great reward and thou shalt be strengthened, and through this thou shalt strengthen many, for thou shalt have been through the anvil and the beating and the heat, and thou shalt know in the end that it is of Me and that I have created thee into what I will have thee to be. And thou wilt be able in turn to help others during their time on the anvil and through their time of beating.
40. (I had a picture that went along with the prophecy of the muscular arm holding the huge hammer. It was banging with full force, with all its strength. It wasn't like it was just a little tinkering, but it was pounding as hard as it could to shape the metal. It shocked me to see something being hit that hard. I never realized they did it that way or that they hit that hard. It occurred to me too that I'm sure Joseph probably feels very weak through all this, but in fact, he's been made strong because of it. All the beating and everything he's gone through has made him into a pretty strong person, although I'm sure he doesn't feel that way. He probably feels like a wreck, but in the long run he's probably much stronger for it.
41. (Making tempered steel is an involved process and it goes through shock treatments, extreme heat, extreme cold--not just once, but repeatedly. But the more it's done, the tougher the metal gets, and it results in very tough steel. The Lord does the same thing with us spiritually to toughen us up.)
Visions and Verses:
42. While receiving the prophecy about the Lord being his shield and buckler (see paragraph 32), I had a vision of Joseph as a knight. He was kneeling on his right knee, his left leg was kind of crooked up, and he was leaning heavily on a staff. And though he himself looked a bit bedraggled, he still had a very bright and shiny helmet and a shiny shield right in front of him.
43. It seemed he was feeling so weak that all he could do was prop himself up on one knee and then lean fully and heavily on the staff with this shield held upright. The bottom edge of his shield was on the ground, and it was in front of him reflecting the light. It was real shiny and bright like he had faithfully kept it polished. It seemed that the shield, like the Word, was the only thing that was keeping him, because the rest of him looked so tired and beaten down. It was so sweet how he had kept the shield so shiny. He was looking up toward the light and he became so joyous, with this incredible look of happiness on his face. It was so sweet and he was so thankful and relieved and happy.
* * *
44. I got the phrase, "Man of sorrow, acquainted with grief." Sometimes you think when somebody is going through it so bad that the Lord is dealing with them, but apparently, in this case He is just making him more like Jesus.
* * *
45. (Techi:) The Lord gave me, "I will never leave thee nor forsake thee. Though the mountains shall depart and though the hills be removed, My kindness shall not depart from thee. I will not leave thee comfortless. I will come to thee." And "A bruised reed shall I not break, and the smoking flax shall I not quench."
* * *
46. While we were praying I saw a vision of him in Mama's arms, and it was really beautiful.--Like through Mama the Lord's love was shining completely over him. He seemed like he had almost given up hope because he had so many burdens and cares, but in the picture he was completely relaxed. It was sort of like he was in the arms of Jesus, but it was Mama holding him all around. Then I got the words, "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart."
* * *
47. (Peter:) When we first started to pray I got something about Job.--How Job lost everything, but then in the end he gained everything back. (Four other people got the same thing about Job.)
* * *
48. I got the verse, "Be not weary in well doing, for in due season ye shall reap if ye faint not," like Job.
* * *
49. I had a vision of a beautiful waterfall in the distance, and then I got the words, "As cold waters to a thirsty soul, so shall these words be from a far country." Also, when you were getting the vision about the anvil, I kept seeing a horseshoe. The blacksmith had a horseshoe and he was banging on it, and it was going in and out from the furnace to the anvil. Then the prophecy said something about, "I am molding thee and shaping thee for the purpose that I have for thee," and in the end the horseshoe became a crown!
50. I also got the verses: "Come, and let us return unto the Lord: for He hath torn, and He will heal us; He hath smitten, and He will bind us up. After two days will He revive us: in the third day He will raise us up, and we shall live in His sight. Then shall we know, if we follow on to know the Lord: His going forth is prepared as the morning; and He shall come unto us as the rain, as the latter and former rain unto the earth" (Hosea 6:1-3).
51. And the words to the song, "Farther along we'll know all about it. Farther along we'll understand why. Cheer up, my brother, live in the sunshine. You'll understand things all by and by."
* * *
52. Guilt can be very strong.--The guilt of failure, your children have left, your mate has left, you feel it's all your fault. And I thought, "Boy, what verse could you get to combat that?" And what came to me was, "There is no condemnation to them that are in Christ Jesus" (Rom.8:1). We need to just keep looking to the Lord. Also, since his teens were of an accountable age, they were responsible for their own actions.
53. I was thinking also of the letter from his son, Mark Elder, and how many kids it's going to help and how many it's going to keep. So even though Mark is away, the Lord is using him.
* * *
54. In the very beginning when we started praying I got the words, "Will I not care for My own?" The Lord loves Joseph's sons even more than he does, and the Lord is going to continue working in their lives and see them through the way He wants them to go.
* * *
55. I had a little picture of a stream that was very very straight, and a big weeping willow tree right by the stream with some of its branches hanging in the water. I was thinking, "I don't understand what this means." Then someone started to give the prophecy about the knight and I thought, "Maybe this is where the knight goes when he's resting; he sits by the stream and leans against the tree and is refreshed by the Lord." But there was also something in the tree, some little white thing. I don't know what it was, but maybe Joseph will know. Actually, I thought it was a note, but I thought, "A note in the tree? That's really sort of far-fetched." (Someone suggests maybe it's Mama's letter to Joseph!)
* * *
Oh, the wonderful story of deathless love!
Each child is dear to that heart above:
He fights for me when I cannot fight,
He comforts me in the gloom of night,
He lifts the burden, for He is strong,
He stills the sigh, and awakens the song;
The burdens that bow me down He bears,
And loves and pities because He cares.
LETTER TO THE YOUNG PEOPLE IN PERU!
From Mama, 9/94:
Dear young people in Peru,
56. God bless you! We love you, and are very thankful for each of you.
57. Some of your shepherds were so impressed with your dedication that they recently wrote us about it. They said that all the Homes in Peru are working together exceptionally well on all fronts and are accomplishing much more unitedly--winning more souls and getting out more message--than could have been done by each Home working separately. They mentioned that you have some inspiring and fruitful ministries, such as weekly meaningful meetings where you are ministering the Word to other young people, a fruitful ministry visiting different drug rehabilitation centers, regular Bible classes where you are witnessing to and feeding other young people, a ministry with the Civil Defense, and now an opening to witness and perform in Miraflores, one of the better sections of Lima. Praise the Lord! We were impressed to hear of your zeal to witness and win souls, as well as your enthusiasm to get out the tools and raise support for your Homes. God bless you for your love for the Lord and the lost that motivates you to go out into your neighborhoods seeking out His sheep!
58. We are aware of the intensive investigation of the Family that was conducted there some months back, and the less-than-loving and inconsiderate way the many tests were carried out on you and your younger brothers and sisters, but how you endured and stood firm in defending the faith and continued to witness. You stood strong and wielded the weapon of the Word, publicly defending your beliefs when questioned about your parents and training.
59. We also heard how the Family was under constant bombardment by the TV and press, and how some of you young people were even mocked and called names by others when out witnessing because of it, but you still kept going out witnessing and it bore very good fruit. We greatly admire you for passing the test and courageously defending your faith.
60. We are also proud of those of you who recently came from Argentina for being such strong soldiers and standing strong through all kinds of traumatic experiences, in spite of the evil attacks of our enemies there.
61. We heard how one of you flew to Argentina to help out during the time of the raids, and bravely faced the authorities and demanded the release of your brothers and sisters, then flew back to Peru with them after visiting and encouraging your parents who were in jail. God bless you, Carmen!
62. In their reports, your shepherds have also mentioned that you young people had received correction for some weak areas that you needed to change and grow in, and that you might have been a little discouraged afterward. We know you're not perfect, and we know there are a lot of areas you can improve in, but you've already been told about these.
63. So here in this letter we just want to encourage you about all the good you have done and all the tests you have passed, and all the progress that you've made--how you've been good soldiers and you've endured hardness and you've been survivors. All these things are much more important to the Lord--and to us--than your NWOs and your weaknesses and imperfections and failures. In fact, it's an even greater testimony that the Lord has been able to do such marvelous things, in spite of any of your weaknesses, to show His strength through you! Praise the Lord!
64. So please don't feel discouraged or condemn yourself for your failures!--Just praise Him for all your successes! It's God's plan that we all fail sometimes to accomplish His purpose of keeping us humble and desperate and close to Him and able to partake of His comfort and mercy and forgiveness. Just don't let the Devil, through condemnation, put a negative interpretation on your mistakes and faults to the point that you become discouraged and stop fighting.
65. The very things that the Lord wants to use to make you stronger, the Devil would like to use to defeat you, so don't let him have the satisfaction of seeing any surrender on your part. Don't give in to discouragement for one moment, or let the Devil and his evil imps have any territory. Resist him and he'll flee from you!
66. As long as you are really desiring to do your best for Jesus, your successes will always be greater than your failures, even if you can't see it. No matter how bad you are or think you are, just the fact that you want to serve Jesus shows that you are still fighting and the Devil hasn't won; therefore, you and the Lord are winning, and that is a great success and outweighs anything else, thank You Jesus!
67. If you have questions and don't understand some things, even after you've asked, if you keep making the same mistakes over and over, if your NWOs keep cropping up again and again, if you don't like some of the people you work with and you don't agree with them, don't be discouraged! Just do the best you can and don't condemn yourself for what you can't do. "For if there be first a willing mind, it is accepted according to that a man hath, and not according to that he hath not" (2Cor.8:12).
68. It's good to fight being critical, it's good to be full of faith. It's important to work on your weaknesses, and it's good to like the people you work with; but the point is, if you miss it sometimes--or even a lot of times--don't take it too hard, and don't give up! If you love Jesus and are trying, He will give you credit for that. We pray you are each able to shine for the Lord and use your gifts to the fullest for His glory. Let's all try to see each other with eyes of love and do all we can to help each other along so that together we can make a good team that can fight together to win the battle and change our part of the world. We love you and pray for you!
Love and prayers, Mama
Excerpts of Letters from the Young People in Peru after Reading Mama's Letter:
From Carmen (21)
Dearest Mama,
69. No matter how I try, I'm not finding a way to aptly communicate to you how very thankful I am for your letter to us. Even though all your words to us are precious, knowing that you took your time to write to us specifically has made me treasure every word, and helped me feel so much closer to you. It was an extra special reward! Thank you, Mama, for your love!
70. Since we got your letter I've read it at least once every two days, and if I could use one word to describe it, that word would be: Liberating! Without completely realizing it, I've put myself under the pressure of striving hard to be "something" for the Lord. I felt I had to acquire the capability of carrying a big responsibility or title, and if I didn't, then I wasn't living up to my full potential and would be failing the Lord. Being under the weight of trying to fulfill the duty of the law without the spirit or correct motivation was discouraging.
71. Thank the Lord, your words helped pull me out from under the cloud of puzzlement and confusion that hung overhead, making me feel that the goal was unattainable and the mark was too far off. You've clarified that the goal is to love Jesus and to desire to please and serve Him. I'm almost embarrassed to see how I've complicated things by straying from that simple principle. So that's why I now feel liberated to just love Jesus! Though I know that's what matters most to Him, it was relieving and also wonderful to know that you love us unconditionally in spite of our weakness, and you have faith for us! You've given me the faith and conviction to continue fighting, knowing that if my goal is to love Jesus more, all the other requirements will have a reason and a purpose, and I'll be motivated to keep them out of appreciation for the privilege of being secure in His love.
72. Each point you touched on was exactly what I needed: not to worry about unanswered questions, to look at each other through the eyes of love, don't be discouraged, etc. Those little phrases have been going through my head almost continually, and each time I'd get hit with a battle, something from your letter would come to mind and I would stand on that and it would bring the victory. Thank You Jesus! Grandpa said that you have a victory in cheerfulness because you sing or hum praises continually, and since I read that I've been trying to make that a habit in my life! Thank you for your beautiful sample!
73. Thank you once again for your love and encouragement! It's made me want to fight all the harder, to be more faithful to our Family standard, be more dedicated and committed, be closer to you and Dad, and to love Jesus more! I pray for you daily! May He shower you richly with blessings! I love you forever!
Love, your daughter, Carmen
From Elise (formerly Miracle, 27)
Dearest Mama,
74. The day we read your letter I was feeling at the end of my rope as far as discouragement, and had prayed, committing it to the Lord, that He was going to have to do something to help me, as I felt there wasn't anything more I could do! Discouragement has been one of my greatest NWOs, mainly in getting down about myself and comparing myself with others, especially along the lines of being able to communicate better and easier with others. This day in particular I felt that I had gone from a spiral to a nose dive--I was just discouraged about the fact that I was discouraged, on the verge of tears for a couple of days, and didn't know how I could even bring myself to tell someone about it again as I felt I was just a hopeless case!
75. Your letter was short and simple, yet so powerful, and has been a key in helping me to fight! TYJ! It has not only made it clear what I was going through and why, but what I had to do about it!--Don't do it! It was like the lightning bolt that took the scales from my eyes in helping me to see that when I'm hit with these trials, I shouldn't stop to "try and analyze them" like I have done so many times, thinking that this will help me in fighting and getting the victory. All I have to know and see now is that it is not of the Lord and dangerous, and I have to fight it with all I'm worth! Now I have been able to see discouragement as a red flashing warning light, saying, "Danger, get away, fight!" which is helping me to nip it in the bud and get some real victories! TYJ!
76. In being able to see this better, I am also seeing how much some of these things are related: Discouragement, negative thinking, condemnation, comparing, etc., which are all "unfruitful activities." For the first time in my life, I feel that the Lord can truly help me in fighting and gaining real victories in these areas to the point where some of these "weaknesses" can even become "strengths." Hallelujah! With this letter goes much, much love and prayers! I love you!--Elise
From Solomon (21)
Dear Shepherds,
77. Mama's Letter was like warm morning sun dispelling the nebulous uncertainties and doubts that had clouded my mind, and I was so encouraged by her tenderness and understanding of our situation.--Such a precious mother who is so concerned about each Family individual.
78. What really stood out to me is how she makes it so easy for us to be good! When we get so down and discouraged about our sins and shortcomings, she simply comes along and lifts us up with sweet words of encouragement and shows us how much progress we've made and are making! She completely pulls the rug out from under the "poor me" attitude we can so easily get into by addressing each of the excuses we often use and giving us simple, Word-based answers.
79. One of my NWOs and a frequent cause of discouragement is when I start comparing myself with others, and of course it's all downhill from there! But when Mama said, "Don't worry about it, just do your best for the Lord," that really struck me as the key to victory with my bout of discouragement and I felt an immediate relief, as the Enemy's lies were eliminated by that simple truth!
80. I was particularly touched by her compassionate Letter to Mark Elder. (See DFO GN 39.) It conveyed such understanding and sensitivity that I was moved to tears. It's hard to express the warmth I felt as her Letter to him was being read. Maybe it's because I'm naturally somewhat of an insecure person and it gave me such a feeling of comfort and peace that I could just imagine the wonderful encouragement her Letter is going to be to all those who, like myself, have a certain degree of inferiority complex. I simply can't verbalize the beautiful feeling that came over me through hearing Mama's tremendous compassion and feeling toward a wayward son. It's so heartening to know that no matter how low I may stoop or how far I may stray, even when I think I'm at the point of no return, when the coarseness of my sins buffets and mocks past virtue; there will always be a gentle outstretched hand and a mother's soft cry for her forlorn yet unforsaken son. I know there are many, many teens who will be tremendously lifted and encouraged by this beautiful Letter.
Love, Solo
From Heidi (15)
Dear Grandpa and Mama,
81. I love you! I wanted to thank you for the letter you sent us teens here in Peru, it was so encouraging. Lately I've been hit with discouragement and negative thoughts, and like it says in "Standing at Heaven's Gate" (Christian Digest 13), the Devil was trying to put out my light and make my job and service for the Lord look very boring. I was asked to go and record a few songs in the studio, but instead of leaving my battles and negative thoughts, I took them with me.
82. I poured out my heart to one of my shepherds and told her that I had taken my eyes off the Lord, and instead of putting my all into the singing I would get sidetracked and think of myself and the way I was feeling. Then she prayed for me, and by faith I have the victory. I almost got discouraged, but I thought: "I'm not going to get discouraged, because Mama said in her Letter to us, `If you have questions and don't understand some things, even after you've asked, if you keep making the same mistakes over and over ... if you don't like some of the people you work with and you don't agree with them, don't be discouraged!'" It was such a comfort to know that there was still hope. I'm really thankful that you took your time to write us and for being a real mommy to me.
With much love, your daughter in the Lord, Heidi
From Rejoice (17)
Dearest Grandpa and Mama,
83. I love you so much! I've read your letter to us three times already, and I just feel like reading it over and over again, because it's so encouraging and gives me the faith that I need to keep fighting.--Much, much love, Rejoice
From Daniela (YA)
Dear Mama,
84. I love you! Your letter gave me instant victory, like coming out of a dark cell. The phrase that stuck with me the most was when you said something like, "No matter what your mistakes are, if you fall in love with Jesus, your victories will always be greater," and also that, "It is the Lord's plan that you fail sometimes to help keep you humble." Every part of that letter touched me personally and moved me to tears, knowing that you care about us even way out here in Peru. Thanks so much for taking the time to write. Just the other day I was feeling a little down, but when I remembered that you said you were praying for us, it changed my whole outlook, thank You Lord!--Love, your daughter in the Lord, Daniela
JUST SAY "NO!" TO CONDEMNATION!
85. (Intro: After hearing the news of Dad's graduation, dear Paula [Bithia] became extremely despondent, feeling that the hurt she had caused Dad through her involvement in the persecution of the Family had contributed to his death. Paula's shepherds had asked for desperate prayer for her, as no amount of counselling, talking, reading or explaining had been able to help her shake this feeling of despair and condemnation that she was suffering. After hearing this request for Paula, Mama wrote her the following letter:)
From Mama, 12/94:
Dear Paula,
86. God bless you! I love you! I heard you were having some big battles and I wanted to write you right away. I've been real happy for you and just thrilled with what the Lord is doing in your life. The Lord has so wonderfully helped you! Please don't let the Enemy steal away your victories now. Not only is he trying to steal away your victories, but he's trying to steal your life!
87. You're fighting for your life, you know, so don't just give up and let the Devil have it. Just stop it! Right now! The Lord has given you a will, and you can use it. I've had to tell that to four people in the last few days, starting with myself. But it's so very true. If we'll just say "No!" to the Enemy and "No!" to the Enemy's darkness, his doubts, his fears and his condemnation, and "Yes!" to the Lord's light and truth and freedom, we can overcome.
88. Every time I would think about Dad, no matter what the memory of him, I would get hit with a condemning thought. If I'd think about him sitting out in his little work area, the Enemy would immediately attack me with: "You didn't spend enough time there with him." If I'd think of him climbing the stairs and what an effort it was for him, immediately the Enemy would say, "You didn't sympathize enough with him!" If I'd think about sharing the television news together--he watching and I listening--immediately the thought came: "You didn't record enough of his commentaries on it for the Family," and on and on and on!
89. No matter what sweet picture I would remember of Dad, there was an immediate attack of the Enemy to make me feel guilty. I'm sure it was all true, but what can I do about it now?--Nothing but do my very best for Jesus and for Dad to carry on with the work that they have assigned me to do.
90. So I realized I had a will and I could choose not to think about Dad--if in so doing, I was getting so attacked. So I just decided to do what the Word says and "forget those things that are behind and look forward to the things that are before" (Phil.3:13). After all, those are just memories of Dad. Right now I have Dad with me just as much as ever, in Spirit, and I am conscious of his presence all the time, and it makes me happy, not sad. So why think back on past memories when I can look forward with Dad to glorious possibilities? I don't need the memories of the man when I've got the man! The memories will be nice some time when the Devil stops attacking me on them and trying to make very sweet, positive experiences so negative.
91. So, Paula, no matter what you did in the past, the Lord has forgiven you, Dad has forgiven you, I have forgiven you, and the Family has forgiven you. The Lord never allowed one thing more than He knew the Family needed, nor one thing more than we could take. You suffered enough just through the natural consequences of your actions. But you have been forgiven, so who is it that condemns you?--It's the Devil, of course. The Lord spoke to someone the other day and said that any discouraging thoughts were of the Enemy and not of Him. So if you feel discouraged or worried or fearful or guilty, this is not of the Lord; it is of the Enemy. You must resist him and give no place to him!
92. The following is something I sent to someone the other day, which I would like to say personally to you as well:
93. So cheer up if you make mistakes! --You should be thankful! The Lord loves your broken and contrite heart. "Contrite" means "repentant." How can you be "repentant" unless you've done something wrong? How can you say, "God be merciful to me a sinner" if you never make any mistakes and you don't believe you are a sinner?
94. So why don't we try thanking God for our mistakes instead of beating ourselves up for them? Why don't we try to see all the Romans 8:28 in them instead of sinking down in despair and bemoaning our failures and all of the problems they've caused us and everybody else?
95. Even if we can believe that Jesus doesn't condemn us and that others don't condemn us, we have a hard time not condemning ourselves. We figure that if the Lord isn't going to punish us, and no one else is going to punish us, we have to punish ourselves. After all, we're bad and that means we need to keep paying the consequences. But this is not the case. Jesus has already paid the price for our sins--not just our sins before salvation, but when He died on the cross He took all our sins--past, present and future--on Himself, and was punished for those sins so that we would not have to be punished.
96. But we still try to punish ourselves --we still try to do penance. Penance is self-punishment, suffered willingly to show that one is sorry for having done wrong in an effort to obtain forgiveness. But penance won't gain us forgiveness--not one iota of it! We can only be forgiven through Jesus' blood that He shed on the cross, not through our own works.
97. What the heathen do for penance in the flesh, we often try to do in the spirit. They whip themselves, nail themselves to crosses, walk on hot coals, etc. We torture ourselves the same way in the spirit as they do in the flesh. We can no more help ourselves by this torture of our spirits than they can by their torture of their flesh. We just can't do it ourselves; only Jesus' salvation is able to save us from our sins and mistakes.--And since we're already saved by His blood, why are we trying to save ourselves again by our own efforts?
98. If we try to punish ourselves when Jesus already paid the price so that we wouldn't have to be punished, we are literally slapping the Lord in the face and telling Him that His sacrifice didn't amount to anything. We are despising it, we are belittling it and we are saying that it wasn't enough, and that we have to pay for our own sins. What a terrible thing to do to the Lord, who has sacrificed His life so that we could be free from the bondage and punishment of sin and death!--And thus free to serve Him joyfully without the heavy weights of condemnation.
99. He says very clearly, "There is therefore now no condemnation to them that are in Christ Jesus" (Rom.8:1). Are you in Christ Jesus? Have you accepted His death on the cross as your salvation? Does He live in your heart? Then you also have to accept that that punishment that He paid for your sins means all of your sins--every one of them--and that there is absolutely no need for you to pay for them yourself or to punish yourself through condemnation. Not only is there no need, but you have no right to try to do it. You have no right to try to usurp Jesus' place. You have no right to tell Him that He didn't do a good enough job, that you still need to punish yourself, because He didn't do the job well enough.
100. He is saying to you, "There is now no condemnation, because I have paid the price. You are no longer condemned for your sins--any of your sins--because I paid for them all by giving My life. I was condemned for you so that you don't have to be condemned." The Devil will try to condemn you, but his condemnation is a lie, and if you accept it, you're letting yourself be punished for something that you don't need to be punished for--that you shouldn't be punished for!--Because Someone was already punished in your place.
101. Not only are you making the Lord feel bad because you didn't accept His sacrifice for you--the gift of His life that He paid for you--but you're torturing and immobilizing yourself for nothing. It's not necessary and it has no value, and it's not going to do you any good. It makes you feel very bad and it saddens the Lord, who paid so much to keep you from having to pay because He knew that you could never pay enough, and that any payment you would pay would be worthless. It would do absolutely no good.
102. So, dear Paula, think on these things and let them take root in your heart. You can be sorry, yes. You can be convicted, yes. You can decide that you won't do what you did again, and you can learn lessons from the mistakes you have made. But you cannot sink into the depths of despair, flagellating yourself, refusing to be comforted and constantly thinking negative thoughts that the Devil wants you to think. Be sorry for any damage caused and get it over with, and then be thankful for your mistakes and count your blessings, and see what God has done through your mistakes to make you a better person for Him. Get up right away and go on and try again.
103. Jesus knows how much you love Him and how greatly you are dedicated to His work and His Family, and His heart breaks to see you in such a state of despondency and overwhelming grief. Not only does it torture you, but it immobilizes you, and gets you right where the Enemy wants you. Jesus wants to take you in His arms and comfort you, if you'll just look up and reach out.
104. Dear Paula, as that beautiful song goes:
When you have exhausted your store of endurance,
When your strength has failed 'ere the day is half done.
When you've reached the end of your hoarded resources,
Your Father's full giving has only begun.
* * *
He'll fight for you when you cannot fight,
He'll comfort you in the gloom of night,
He'll lift the burden, for He is strong,
He'll still the sigh and awaken the song.
The burdens that bow you down He'll bear,
And love and pity, because He cares!
105. --All you have to do is let Him. Please do!--Right now! You've come so far, don't disappoint the Lord! Don't fail His Family. Don't hurt Dad. What you will do now if you give up will be worse than what you did before, and will have just as grievous consequences. Satan has desired to have you, but Jesus--and Dad--are praying for you that your faith does not fail. With God's love, nothing is impossible--if you'll just put your will on His side! Just say "Yes!" to Jesus!
106. We love you very much and are upholding you in our prayers.
Love, Mama
P.S. Dear Family, please pray earnestly for Paula, as the Enemy is attacking her viciously--not only with condemnation, but with problems with her children, etc.
Copyright (c) 1998 by The Family